Forgot my action figure.Sorry.
Princess Diana (has she been done?) if so, then Nancy Reagan
Sleeps with all your male action figures. Brain the size of a pea sold separately. Bastard younger son not available.
Shakespeare
As you can see comes with book and quill pen.
King Edward the Confessor
Pull his string to hear him say “Sun’s bad for an albino!” and “I’m saving myself for my wedding night… in fact, not even then!” Comes with a faceless unnamed successor figure.
Peg Entwhistle
(In case it’s too obscure, Peg Entwhistle [whose name comes up on these boards a fair bit] was the actress who jumped to her death from the Hollywood(land) sign and also [just for trivia] the stepmother of actor Brian Keith.)
Well, with that bit of research help…
The Peg Entwhistle action figure is equipped with Amazing Hollywood Sign-Leaping Action ™. Caution: NOT a flying toy. Hollywood sign, Brian Keith and Grieving Family action figures sold separately.
(I hope everyone noticed that I restrained myself from making a Tolkien joke. “Entwhistle”… heh.)
George Michael.
My first thought was “I wonder if she’s related to the Who bassist,” so I guess we all have our own forms of nerdery.
George Michael
Watch its amazing Park Restroom Pickup Action! Part of the Sad Pop Hasbeen Line – collect them all!
Alger Hiss
The Alger Hiss action figure opens up a world of Cold War play options. Is he a Soviet agent? Parlor pink? Courageous public servant? You decide! Comes with a well-cut suit, briefcase and revokable State Department security clearance. Whittaker Chambers action figure, HUAC Hearing Room and Pumpkin Patch playsets sold separately. Richard Nixon 1950s action figure with Dynamic Microfilm-Reading and Red-Baiting Action ™ now discontinued due to lack of sales.
(BTW. Alger Hiss was a classmate of my grandfather’s!)
No shit! Cool!
And who’s next?
Ooops! Right.
Ethel Merman (it was her birthday earlier this week).
It doesn’t come with a megaphone – it is a megaphone – because
There’s no business like show business …
Harriet Beecher Stowe
Dressed in a crinoline. Has lifelike, ink-stained hands. Pull her string and she says, “I’m the little lady who wrote the big book that started the great war.”
Henry VIII
Henry VIII–has lifelike, blood-stained hands. Has several old wedding dresses, which may or may not be like crinoline.
Comes with bluprint for several generations of religious civil war.
Yuri Gagarin.
Pull his string and he says in a Richard Burton voice, “I care not if the sun and the planets cease in their courses, I shall have her!”
Nice action figure to impress the ladies.
Really, really annoyed Pope is not included.
Wives available separately.
Comes with a dog and a monkey; other cosmonauts sold separately.
Thomas E. Dewey
There were no other Cosmonauts—those were unmanned test launches. Completely unmanned. The other figures advertised on the back of the Gagarin package were…prototypes that were dropped from the toy line.
Tom Dewey comes with a card-model gallows, and a complimentary UMD disk featuring a music video by the Kingston Trio, and the full-length motion picture The Legend of Tom D—oh, sorry. Wrong figure.
Uh…Thomas E. Dewey comes with an easy-bake-oven wedding cake kit, a stack of death warrants, and he is a very nice figure, very nice indeed. He has a bright future. (Over-optimistic newspaper sold seperately.)
Figure may be redeemed for a John Kerry action figure with a mail-in offer.
:smack:
Since Ranchoth forgot to give a name, let me throw out …
CG Jung
The C.J. Jung action figure comes with a stack of books, ink-stained fingers and a little sign that says, “It’s pronounced ‘Yung,’ dammit!”
J.K. Rowling.
Damn close to impossible to find behind all the stacks of money – keep digging, though, she’s in there.
Coco Chanel.
Coco comes complete with her own miniature bottle of gold colored water, labelled No. 5. She also comes with a pillbox hat, and a severly tailored suit with contrasting piping. Pull her string and she says, “There have been many Duchesses of Westminster; there is only one Chanel.”
Little black dress and Nazi officer escort sold separately.