The Late, Great Hamburger! I Mourn It's Passing.

In My Humble Opinion
1

Once, a long, long time ago, when the world was young, the skies were clear and everyone had a car in every drive way and a chicken in every pot, people said things like ‘gosh’ and ‘gee’ and kids rode single speed, fat tired bikes and televisions were Black and White and used antennas, there were no fast food places. One went down to the local diner or drugstore soda fountain, and ordered a hamburger.

These were hamburger SUPREMES! These were hamburgers made of genuine meat! These were hamburgers not made from pre-frozen, vegetable protein cut, pre-weighed, pre-formed patties. These were burgers made from a ball of ground beef, skillfully rolled by the waitresses dainty hands or the cooks hard ones and dropped on the surface of a well aged, sizzling hot, dark iron griddle and flattened with a steel spatula.

There were no fears about bacteria in the meat because the government had not declassified - degraded - the grades. Grade A beef WAS grade A and not grade B raised to grade A, like today. They did not process manure back into feed either and feed it to the cows, like today, nor slaughterhouse scraps.

As the thick patty sizzled on the grill, soaking up the flavoring from many, many a previous burger cooked on the porous iron, a skilled waitress/cook would reach into a small stainless steel bin and scoop out some freshly diced onions and slap them down in the grease to fry fragrantly. At just the right time, she would place a fresh bun on the dry area of the grill, open side down, to toast to a golden brown.

All of this while smoothly waiting on other customers, who were sitting at the counter and enjoying the fragrant smells of the burger, boiling hot dogs, sizzling fries and frying eggs while enjoying Cokes made from soda fountain carbonated water and syrup, served in tall, crushed ice filled, curved bell glasses.

As you sipped on your indescribably good Coke (adding the syrup was never an exact science then and if the waitress liked you, she gave you a little extra squirt) through paper straws, she expertly placed the hot, aromatic buns on a plate, flipped the sizzling, juicy burger on one, covered it with a serving of amber, cooked onions, added a side of lettuce, a slice of rich, thick tomato and a big slice of juicy dill pickle and served it up to you with a flourish. Along with it came a smaller side plate heaped up with golden, never frozen French fries.

She would then present you with small jars of Mayo and mustard to add to your feast at your discretion.

NOW, THAT WAS A BURGER!!

There was no slapping thawed patties of 75% meat, preweighed down on a grill, no reheating them in a microwave oven, no slapping them on cheap, cardboard flavored buns, and one could safely have them rare. Hamburgers were beef scraps mixed with beef fat and no organ meats were tossed in for filler or bits of beef best tossed on the scrap pile. Mostly they were made from scraps of steak, trimmed off and ground up.

Back then, butchers took pride in their hamburger, regarding quality and flavor above cost and filler. Adding soya bean extract would have been considered appalling.

MMMMMMMMM! I miss those burgers. I miss those places. I have not had a good Coke or Pepsi or Root Beer or any soda since they started selling the stuff pre-mixed.

When Royal Castle vanished, so did those wonderful little diced and delicately cooked onions. Now they throw on a massive slab of onion and expect one to be happy or not to notice that it makes you think you’ve got a thicker burger.

Plus, those great dill pickles are gone. Now you get chips or measly quarter slices.

2

The part I miss the most is the part about not being able to get them rare anymore cause of this stupid E. Coli scare. The waitress always tells you that the can’t serve them rare, then offers to give you one that is medium rare, but when it comes its the same brownish hue as dog crap. Forget bungee jumping, someday I’m going to tell my grandkids that I used to eat big, beautiful, blood-dripping practically raw, 3/4 pound hunk of ground beef. Of course I’ll probably be telling them postumously cause I feel inspired to thaw out some artery-clogging cow flesh. :slight_smile:

3

I grew up in that same ‘Leave-it-to-Beaver’ neighborhood. And I loved my cheeseburgers. I can still remember how they tasted, and Burger King doesn’t have the recipe. But don’t lose hope. Here on the Big Island of Hawaii, a bar and eatery called ‘Charleys’ still makes them any way you want. Local Angus beef, cooked rare and juicy. Fresh, sunripe tomatoes, sweet Maui onions and green, leafy lettuce, all grown locally and picked the same morning.

Of course, we also have the freshest fish for sushi and sashimi. Meat and fish only need to be cooked when they are too spoiled to eat raw or have been frozen. Chicken and fowl? Well, I throw them on the barbie for awhile.

4

Passing? You mourn its passing?

It hasn’t gone anywhere, pal. YOU’VE just started eating at fast food franchises, and now you’re getting all nostalgic for something you can still heve at your local non-chain coffee shop, diner, or grill.

This comes up OVER AND OVER, especially in the Pit…people complain about crappy food at McDonalds and Burger King and Wendy’s, as if they have NO CHOICE but to give those establishments their business, and eventually someone (Byzantine, often) drops in and says “STOP EATING THERE!!! YOU DON’T HAVE TO EAT THERE!!! THE FOOD ISN’T GOOD THERE!!!”

Anyway, those hamburgers of yore were not as good as you remember…check out some 1930s fiction (references in Steinbeck and Thurber come to mind, for example). People in those books didn’t have “a hamburger.” Thet had “a couple of hamburgers.” That means that there was so little actual meat between the roll that you needed two or three sandwiches to stave off hunger. And I’ll bet those little diners and grills on those country roads, or downtown near the train station, were no strangers to “meat extenders,” either.

5

Damn it, TC, now I have to vacation in Hawaii. I’ll buy you a burger if you’ll show me where this place is.

6

GRRRRRRRRRRRRR!! (Savage snarl there.)

I wasn’t around in the 1930s, but I was in the 50s and locally, plus in the popular next city, our diners and soda counters (like the old Woolworth’s used to have) turned out a good sized, magnificent burger. They kept the meat, ground chuck or a good ‘hamburger’ in a stainless steel container, chilled, near the grill. When a burger was ordered, the cook or waitress/cook would reach in, scoop out some by hand and ball it up.

They might have had filler in the 30s, after the ‘great depression’ but I came about in the boom times after the war. Business was good, everyone had a car, developers were plowing in authentic ‘ranch-style tract housing,’ people were working and the economy was fine. Television was still new and quality was something to be proud of.

Grade A beef was GRADE A beef. Eateries around here got good grade hamburger. Royal Castle sold mini-burgers for 5 cents each - topped with cooked onion. They often sold them in ‘sheets’. The meat was not ruined with Soya, ‘garbage’ meat like from the neck and organs considered unsalable, vegetable protein and packed with extra water added, or fat.

I don’t eat in local fast food places, having already experienced their fare. I have found a few diners which make a hamburger from fresh beef, but the beef has changed and few, if any, use those delicious, chopped and fried onions. (They have gone the way of the once ever present beef stew in restaurants.)

When I was a child, my city was considered a small town. (Not anymore!) People ate raw beef safely. My brother, having an iron deficiency, was told by our doctor to eat raw beef liver. My Mother bought it for him and he ate it, developing a taste for raw meat in the process. He, among others, used to enjoy eating raw beef and hamburger from time to time. You could get meat nearly raw at restaurants. Now, you cannot and he no longer eats raw meat.

Local bakeries produced tasty breads and buns and the commercial ones sold in grocery stores were good. No one would dare produce the tasteless, cheap bread that SUBWAY does and use it for anything but pig food. One could buy cut up beef bones in the grocery store for pennies a pound. (They’re used for making beef soup stock. They add taste plus the broth made with them will jell when cooled.) Now one pays $1.00 a pound for them, if they can be found and the quality is usually very low.

Even the buns the Big McD and BK use do not have the flavor of the old ones. I have to order custom made hamburger to get something tasty and sometimes, I find it necessary to make it myself. AND, what is the big deal about no longer making those good, diced and fried onions that used to be so popular?

7

You can still get one of those in my town. A local bar, the guy pats them up himself, also homemade chicken and tuna salad. I just very rarely eat hamburgers. I hate hamburger. I rarely even want one on the grill at home. I was married to a guy for 17 years that ate 3 things, one of them was a hamburger. But I will occasionally eat ground beef in something or make my kids a meatloaf. And when I do eat one it has to have lots of mayo, tomato, lettuce, onion, salt and pepper.

I used to love the local drugstore that had a counter. You could get a limeade and homemade egg salad sandwich with chips and a pickle. That was great stuff.

Needs2know

8

You can still get one of those in my town. A local bar, the guy pats them up himself, also homemade chicken and tuna salad. I just very rarely eat hamburgers. I hate hamburger. I rarely even want one on the grill at home. I was married to a guy for 17 years that ate three things, one of them was a hamburger. But I will occasionally eat ground beef in something or make my kids a meatloaf. And when I do eat one it has to have lots of mayo, tomato, lettuce, onion, salt and pepper.

I used to love the local drugstore that had a counter. You could get a limeade and homemade egg salad sandwich with chips and a pickle. That was great stuff.

Needs2know

9

I couldn’t afford to vacation in Hawai’i. I had to move here instead. But it was worth it, even though I took about an 80% pay cut and had to change careers. I’ll do better than tell you where Charlie’s is. I’ll meet you at the airport and drive you there.

10

I couldn’t afford to vacation in Hawai’i. I had to move here instead. But it was worth it, even though I took about an 80% pay cut and had to change careers. I’ll do better than tell you where Charlie’s is. I’ll meet you at the airport and drive you there.

11

You can get a burger and soda and milkshake like that at any Nifty Fifty’s. There are four of them in the Philadelphia area. One is extremely close to my apt! You can get any kind of milkshake you want, freshly made, they have all the syrups for sodas you can think of, and all the food they make is hand made and REAL. chicken nuggets made out of REAL chicken. Fresh beef and rolls. They even have filet mignon burgers, a piece of steak on a roll! Real french fries with the skin on, always cooked in fresh oil.

I really like this place, in case you can’t tell.

12

Some of you might be missing the point. It’s not that we can’t get good burgers, it’s that good burgers used to be the norm.

So were good fries.

And ketchup and mustard bottles used to sit on the table, along with sugar bowls, paper napkin dispensers, dill pickle jars, and salt and pepper shakers.

I worked as a waitress when I was in high school, and the only thing a customer would have to ask for was extra butter. (Real butter.) Cranky old Helen was too cheap to leave it unattended.