Hey SaxFace, don’t apologize. I went more than four years with my last one! 
Sorry - the term I have heard for introducing solids rather than purees etc and letting the baby feed themselves is baby-led weaning - but I think baby-led solids is probably a better descriptor.
I will breastfeed her as long as she wants (within reason!), but I’m wanting experiences with giving babies finger-sized foods and other solids rather than baby food or homemade purees - Unauthorized Cinnamon’s example is the sort of thing I’m looking for.
Ellen, that’s awesome! 
I think what we were thinking is called child-led weaning :
irishbaby is almost 8 months now, and is on three solid meals a day plus breast feeds.
As she isn’t exactly keen on bottles or cups she also has expressed milk made up with a little baby rice from a spoon when I’m at work.
So far she eats pretty much everything I’ve offered her…with the exception of mashed salmon and avocado puree- I think the salmon flavour is too strong, and she didn’t seem to like the texture of the avocado.
We started with baby rice and cereal, moved onto apple, parsnip, banana, pear purees and then to mashed sweet potato, pumpkin, potato, carrot, plum, broccoli, peas etc. She loves porridge.
I do give some bought baby food (there are some nice ones) but she also gets yogurts and home made mashed food. The shop bought pouches and pots are great when you are out and about as you can be sure that they are safe to eat (I’m a bit wary of taking home made leftovers out of the fridge, carrying them around for hours and then only lightly warming them).
You can buy baby or soup pasta shapes and then add that to a simple puree or sauce for some texture- she loves pasta with home made pesto sauce!
YMMV- but I was against baby-led solids for the simple reason that I know she wasn’t going to find it easy moving from the breast to expressed milk when I went to work, and at least if she was being spoon fed I would be sure she was getting some decent nutrition, rather than waiting all day for her to lick a piece of chicken!
At 7 months she started eating toast, rusks, rice cakes, pieces of soft fruit (banana, melon, peach) and some veggie sticks (red pepper, carrot). She actually hates the mesh feeder and won’t eat anything from it- but she’ll happily wolf down anything that you give her otherwise.
So far, it is 2pm and today she has had- 3 breast feeds, a bowl of porridge with yogurt and banana, a pre-made baby food pot (quinoa, pomegranate, guava and plum) while we were out and several rice cakes. She’ll be having leftover lentil and lamb casserole for dinner…I’ll be having Chinese takeaway!
I avoided cereals and grains, and most starches until about 11 months. My children ate lots of vegetables and still do.
This can take two years to do it says on the website. It sounds like a new fad. How many Mom’s have the time to do this sort of thing? I didn’t.
I just did what my Mom told me to do which worked out fine. What next Baby led toilet training? It will take two to 4 years or whenever you tire of buying pull ups…
Kids showing up in kindergarten in their pull ups because they don’t feel ready to wean off them. :dubious:
Perciful, if it doesn’t work for you, don’t do it. It’s not a trend - it’s biology. This might interest you: http://www.kathydettwyler.org/detwean.html
For me, it was important that my daughter be breastfed as long as possible so I made it a priority. I don’t think cow’s milk is good for humans, so I was happy to provide human milk for as long as she wanted. Nothing wrong with parents who choose or think differently.
Also, nursing a toddler isn’t like nursing a baby who may want to be fed constantly. By the time my daughter was 2, she nursed once in the morning and once at night - or if she was injured or sick and needed extra comfort. Those gradually tapered off as she got older when she discovered other ways of feeling safe and secure.
I think a lot of our parenting decisions come from how we were raised. My mother nursed me for 2 and a half years. My grandmother nursed my father for 5 years!
sorry for the hijack
I don’t see the need of a baby breastfeeding for that long. Your Grandmother may have not been able to afford food as it was the great depression. Who is getting the benefit, the child or the mother? Most people drink cows milk all their lives so I don’t see the importance of breat milk after a year. My kids drank from cups at a year and were toilet trained at two and reading by 4. My Mom had a late in life baby, my brother and she bathed him in the sink till he was 4 or 5 and it was ridiculous. She broke all the rules with him because she wanted the attention.
She admits now it was selfish to try and keep him a baby too long. He is now a 30 something year old baby that calls Mom to bail him out and will never marry. I get nervous when I read of anything that is ‘baby-led’ because ultimately that means Mother led.
Actually, most pediatricians do recommend baby-led toilet training, within reason. I think it’s a personal decision and should depend on the kid. My son finished toilet training at 2.5 years. When I pushed him to do it, even taking away his pullups, he misbehaved in other ways or just peed and pooped all over the place. Finally, one day I was sick of fighting with him and told him, “Here’s what you get when you’re toilet trained. Here’s what you can’t do until then. You tell me when you’re ready. Until then, I’m done asking” He was completely potty trained four days later.
As for breastfeeding that long, it may be difficult, but it should be doable. Kids are notorious early risers - so you should have plenty of time to nurse laying down, before work or before you start the day. And nursing before bedtime can just be part of the evening ritual. I think it becomes more difficult logistically when you have more than one, but still possible.
And it might be something of a fad in the West (though longer breastfeeding is becoming more common), but in most other nations in the world, breastfeeding well into toddlerhood is the norm, much like co-sleeping. My husband is from India and was nursed until he was four and slept in the family bed until age seven. Cribs are unheard of in many families, which can facilitate extended breastfeeding.
Thanks, I did not know that long term breastfeeding it was common in other parts of the world. I sometimes don’t take into consideration that cultures in other countries can be very different. My kids are adults now and baby formula is so expensive! We are all different and I had to work so my kids had to be weaned early. Up and out the door by 6am. Co-sleeping is just not something I would elect to do but it may work for some. I wonder how you have sexual relations with children in your bed? Yikes!
My kids were toilet trained in 3 days. Once the diapers are off they never go back on. Same thing for sippy cups and bottles. They are gone and do not come back. My kids were disgusted and started using the toilet after having to pick up a poo or two. Of course I did it on a weekend and didn’t leave the house. If you want to see kid led toilet training work you throw away diapers and make them clean up their mess. They catch on very quickly. No screaming or tantrums or potty chairs to clean and months of failure which I think is bad for the child. I never asked my kids if they were ready. I was ready and it was over in a few days and on to the next milestone. I did let them pick out their own big boy, big girl pants as a reward.
FWIW the WHO recommends exclusive breastfeeding for 6 months and breastfeeding for a MINIMUM of 2 years.
Cow’s milk is not biologically suitable as a main drink before age 1, and as the alternative is formula, you have to consider that it is actually “natural” to breastfeed until a year AT THE VERY LEAST.
Cultural norms about potty-training vary as well-in some cultures babies simply don’t wear nappies!
The current western “nappies til 4 and breastmilk only until they cut their first teeth” is a relatively new phenomenon.
I hear you on the formula thing. Other than the closeness you enjoy with breastfeeding, the convenience and cost make it ideal if you can get past those first weeks (for what it’s worth, I wish someone had prepared me for the reality; being told “If it hurts, you’re doing it wrong,” wasn’t helpful). With my first, I just couldn’t breastfeed exclusively; with kid two, it’s been much, much easier.
As for the co-sleeping thing, it wasn’t a choice I would’ve made with my first, but circumstances required it. With the second, she stays in her crib most of the night until she wakes for a feeding; then, she might stick around to nurse and we’ll both just doze off until the alarm goes off or kid one comes in (whichever is first) or, if she’s being exceptionally disruptive or is very congested, I’ll swaddle her up and stick her back in her own bed. I should be more consistent - I had been concerned about her getting confused - but our arrangement seems to work all of us.
But that is at least in part because worldwide, water is not safe or plentiful. The issues of formula feeding in the first world are significantly less than the issues of formula feeding in the third world - where water may be half a mile away and may not be clean.
Not to say that if you choose to breastfeed until two that’s bad - it certainly isn’t. Just that there shouldn’t be any guilt about not being able to do it that long if you can’t if you have easy access to clean water - like I’d imagine everyone on these boards does.
Yeah, our Western work ethic and culture is not particularly conducive to a long nursing relationship and I do not judge any woman who cannot or does not want to breastfeed for any reason. It’s not my business. It’s a personal choice all the way on how to nourish your baby (as long as he or she is being nourished, of course!).
On the other hand, I think those of us who choose other ways that are not necessarily the cultural norm should not be told how wrong we are/were and that our children will ‘turn out’ badly. There are so many variables when it comes to parenting and so much pressure on parents that differing opinions can lead to feelings of alienation. The “if you don’t do it the way I did it, it’s wrong” mentality just shows me that there are people who, for some reason or another, just need to feel validated.
My second daughter would only eat things she could feed herself from age 5 months. She breast-fed until 8 months. She ended up on a special diet due to failure to thrive. At that age, she didn’t have the coordination to get enough food into her mouth to meet her nutritional requirements. If your baby is breastfeeding happily, then maybe you can skip the puree stage. If they are relying solids for calories or nutrition, they might need a bit of help. It’s hard to take in a lot of food just by sucking on solid chunks.
Unless he was born an identical twin and the twin was raised in a different manner, it’s impossible to blame your brother’s adult personality on the choices made when he was an infant. There are plenty of kids who were doted on excessively who rebel and cut all contact with their parents. There are kids who were left to fend for them selves, and become insecure, needy adults as a result. So why should anyone blame themselves for how they “turned out.”
The notion that first foods dictate adult food preferences is just as misguided, IMHO. There are few babies that were given Scotch or Gin, mixed nuts, and cigars, yet those are quite popular in adults.
One easy way to turn soft solids into ‘baby friendly’ purees’ is to buy a good, solid metal garlic press. The beauty of this (as opposed to a food processor) is that you can even carry it to restaurants, etc. with you. You, baby, and whoever go to a restaurant? You take a few of your softer foods, press them through the garlic press, and, voila! Instant ‘baby food’!
Wow - that’s a truly inspired idea! Not only do you have insta-baby food, you also have the perfect-sized serving. Did you think of that yourself? If you did, I want to bow down before you. Seriously, I think you just helped me figure out how I’ll be prepping baby food once our daughter starts on solids.
It sounds like it is working well. I was just wondering about down the road? There was an epsisode of ‘The Nanny’ that touched on children sleeping with their parents. At a certain point these parents had to hire ‘The Nanny’ to break their two sons of sleeping with them. The kids would not take no for an answer. It was causing night time wars of gigantic proportions. As I watched it I thought I’m in the wrong line of work! She makes a fortune doing what I did for nothing. Laying down the law in my days was a Mother’s job and now they need a Nanny to come in and clean up the mess? She got the kids and parents squared away in a week and both boys sleeping in their own beds and all sippy cups were put out for trash. I’m sure she made thousands doing it.
I’m not trying to say you are wrong, lets get that straight. I am always learning things and new ways of doing old things. I have an open mind. It is just that babies should be babies and they should not lead. We are the mothers and we call the shots for good or for bad. We have instincts and we know our kids better then anyone else.
I even learned something watching my own mother being selfish. There is only 7 years difference between my brother and my son. I raised my kids the way I was raised. My brother was raised by my Mom desperatley trying to hang onto her last baby. She was trying to keep him a baby and dependent on her forever and she succeeded. It is very selfish. He would have turned out fine had he rebelled against my Mother but it was easier to just do what she said and take the money. My Mom is tough! My Mom also was in the process of losing my Dad to Leukemia during my brothers high school years. So in a way she replaced her husband with her son. She sent him to college and then called him home. When she got a boyfriend she kicked him out. It was just selfish. Long and sad story.
One of the hardest things for me was to not to be selfish. I cried buckets when my son moved into his first apartment. I couldn’t even watch him move out. It ripped my heart out but at the same time I let it be. He had to go and live his own life.
Being a Mom has to be the toughest job I ever loved.
Great idea! I’ll pass it on.