Yes this is her Uni as well.
Her boyfriend is an adjunct Prof there as well.
He advises her to keep in under her hat.
Her boss is known at the university to be a problem.
Looks like she’ll be looking for new employment for the next semester.
These office worker positions are highly prized jobs in her dept.
It looks good on your resume or something.
So, for now, she’s gonna stay quiet. The other young woman is out. She is terribly upset by the whole thing.
This is a defeatist attitude, in my opinion. Do we even know her boss is “respected”? He could be an adjunct, for all we know. And if she doesn’t go to HR, perhaps she could just find a friendly, sympathetic ear in the bursar’s office.
I don’t know what field LW is in, but my son is a “lowly graduate student” (in STEM) and the school depends on him and has an ongoing commitment to provide him with employment in exchange for the fact he pays no tuition. They aren’t going to boot him just because he has the misfortune to encounter an unfair situation not of his own making.
I’m not suggesting LW “go public” or openly embarrass her professor, but before assuming the situation is hopeless, I’d need a lot more facts. The way you interpret it, she should keep her mouth shut no matter what’s happening, simply because of a perceived power imbalance. What if he were sexually harassing her? She should just accept it, because letting him get away with it might rock the boat, and the “lowly, minimum wage employee” should always just suck it up? Well, sometimes you have to stand up to bad behavior.
I think how I would respond to this would depend on whether or not it was likely to happen again. Steps should be taken to make sure it doesn’t happen again, and that should about cover it.
Yes, she’s a lowly grad student in the Education dept.
He is/was a very respected Professor and supposedly hand picked her. He’s never been anything but nice to her. Kinda aloof.
She being a dramatic chatty Cathy type, might kinda bug him.
The only real complaint she’s ever had is he expects her to bring him coffee from the local coffee joint every morning. And never pays her back. Now we know why.
No offense to LW, but this makes me wonder if one of the reasons he picked her is because he figured he could get away with BS like making her pay for his coffee. Some students might have the cojones to say, “oh, sorry, Professor, I left my wallet at home. Can you give me the cash for the coffee up front?”
He’s starting to sound quite despicable.
I don’t think you should put the video on social media, but doing nothing is how bullies are born.
I’d absolutely show it to her boss and to someone at the university. Then it’s up to them how it’s handled. No one should be subjected to such abuse anywhere and especially at work.
I totally agree. I told her the same.
I think she does ask him to pay for the coffee. Girls got a mouth on her.
I’m not sure how often he does.
That mouth of hers is why the video shocked me. I can’t believe she stood there while the Woman was going off, mostly silent.
I can tell, by the pitch of her voice the only time she was really worried was when the lady was grabbing for her phone.
IMO, that’s close to assault.
That makes me happy to think about - I am imagining that you serve as a role model for a certain amount of outspokenness, and that’s a good thing.
Thx. But sometimes that mouth gets a foot stuck in it.
She’s the one, who in highschool bucked the system. They had a dress code about odd hair colors.
She was in Grease. Altho’ she was Sandy. She decided all the pink ladies should have pink hair. The Director ok’d it. But the office didn’t.
She fought tooth and nail to let them keep their pink hair through out the play run.
After that, she, with her beautiful blond locks got a color called Cotton Candy put on her hair. It was pink, blue, yellow and purple pastel. Ugly as sin.
She was called to the office.
When I got there she was practically standing on a desk telling those people she had paid $70 bucks for it and it would have to fade out cause she wasn’t dying over it.
They kinda left her alone after that. The dress code about hair colors was phased out.
Her hair looked like crap for her grad pictures. I swear I still see a blue streak occasionally.
She got a D in deportment.
I don’t think it affected her grade point. She was Valedictorian.
(Yep, sneak brag. My baby!)
Love that story. I retract my speculation that the professor may have picked her because he thought he could control her (or if he did, he must not be much of a judge of character).
I’m surprised there are any schools out there that would still give grades in deportment. That seems so old fashioned. I went to a women’s college, class of 1980, and even then we thought stuff like that (which the school had been full of in earlier years) was out of touch.
As far as I know our school system still has it.
Maybe I called it “deportment” in error.
Good citizenship?
Ability to get along with well others?
Not disruptive?
I don’t remember the term exactly.
But, teachers and schools should/could assess students on the barest of behavioral standards. To maybe forestall some bad behaviors before they’re not recoverable from.
IMO.
By the time a student reaches highschool this may too late. I hope not.
The Lil’wrekker has always been a warrior. She’s the tiniest person in the family and came out with her fists clenched. I could see her as being hard down mean and nasty. But she’s not.
Sometimes her mouth overloads her, still.
I keep telling her some one, some day is gonna knock her silly.
I just hope she has an inner compass about these things.
This incident may prove she does. Like I said she was unnaturally quiet in the video. She may have sensed it was best to just let the crazy woman do her crazy.
I’m gonna ask her and see if I can understand it better.
As long as it is coed, I don’t have a problem with it, most likely. The kind of thing that I’d peg as old-fashioned is the sexist stuff: lessons in how to get in and out of a car while wearing a skirt, how to make conversation with a man (say little, ask questions that show you’re listening, admire him), how to apply makeup tastefully, etc.
Does the Prof pay HER correctly on time?
I’d be strongly inclined to find another job…?
She is paid by the University.
Apparently he rated 2 office lowlifes per session.
According to her, he doesn’t over work them like some profs do. And she can work on her own stuff while in office.
I was going to say that LW better learn to stand up for herself, but for your description of her. But letting a deranged person rant at her for 22 minutes? I would have either called the cops or just walked out after about 5 minutes – let her rant to an empty room!
He is a “very respected Professor” so likely paid a reasonable salary. Yet he owes many people, is months behind on rent, and stiffs her on buying coffee each day – where is his money going? My guess is booze or drugs. So his job may not last that long, and then where will her job go? Might be time for her to start looking for something else.
Having to constantly deal with bill collectors over his personal debts, including deranged ones ranting in person, is a hostile work environment. Something the University HR department might be interested in. (But remember, HR departments work for the employer, NOT you – easiest way for them to solve complaints is to get rid of the person bringing the complaint.) Are grad student employees members of a union there? If so, talk to her union steward.
I don’t think students(grad or not) rate unions. So that’s not an option.
She is gonna make Prof look at the whole video.
And tell him she’s sending it to Realtor company who handles his rental.
Her boyfriend who also is a Prof thinks the HR would be a worthless pursuit. He thinks the Prof is well respected, I wouldn’t think he volunteers his info on problems at faculty events.
Next fall she’ll start her student teaching so work at the University probably won’t be in the thought process.