You're obviously working so VERY hard to create a pleasant environment

The BBQ Pit
1

Holy FUCKING Christ, bitch, how about attempting decent FUCKING human interaction, you diseased cunt!

I attend a university famed for bureaucratic red tape, but up until now I have had mainly pleasant experiences with the administrative side of things. All the staff, including cafeteria workers and janitors, are sweet and friendly, and especially the professors have been wonderful, always ready to go that extra mile.

But just one small interaction today has me so angry that my roommates mistook my stomping in for some wild animal attacking, complete with shrieks of fury.

I am a freshman, and up until halfway through last semester I thought I was ineligible for upper-level courses, so when I found out I was very excited (yes, I’m a nerd of the first degree). Unfortunately I couldn’t get a space in the class I wanted most, but, not being easily daunted, I went to the prof the first day of classes and asked about possibilities for joining anyway. He said it was no problem, but told me to wait until after add/drop to formally request into the full class, since I might be able to get a spot conventionally first. I tried but failed to get in, so the minute add/drop was over I started proceedings to get a spot.

This led me to interact today with a girl working in advising at the Student Affairs Office, who is hands-down the most supercilious individual I have ever spoken to in connection with a help-desk. She was condescending, bitchy and incapable of smiling or even adopting a non-friendly tone of voice. All I needed was some forms, but she still felt it necessary to sigh and roll her eyes at me even as I explain that I was doing exactly as my prof had counseled! She eventually thrust the papers at me, informed me that this was a one-off and that one could only do this once at the uni, and I left.

Let me add that during this entire proceeding I had been niceness itself, smiling and thanking her for the forms and her help. Nothing in my demeanour hinted at I thought she was being a little ridiculous. I had the backing of my prof, so I wasn’t worried. Still, I wanted this over with as soon as possible, so I decided to fill out the form etc right away.

I wrote the request letter needed, got the signatures, filled out all the information, and within 45 minutes I was back at the desk, beaming and ready to finally be a part of POLI 345. The girl is standing and gossiping at the back of the office while I wait, but, no worries I think, everyone deserves a bit of down time.

I wait about a quarter of an hour before she finishes up her conversation about how her friend Susie might be breaking up with Mark (bear in mind there’s a line behind me and she’s the only person at the helpdesk) and slouches over to me. I smile and hand her the various papers etc… She looks incredulously at me, down, then back at me, making it very clear she wishes I would go off and die, grumps “fine” and walks off with my papers without a word. I’m unsure whether or not that was it, so I wait a while before she pokes her head around, snarls “what?” I ask whether that was it, she stares at me, so I smile, say “Thank you so much!” and leave.

What. The. Fuck.

Listen bitch, I understand your job sucks, and I bet you’re just dying inside, surrounded by all these smart kids while you were rejected by your local community college, but when someone politely interacts with you during the course of your job, it is your obligation not to fucking hiss at them. I’m not expecting a “top o’ the morning!” attitude, but a tone that doesn’t say you wish I were sliding down a banister of rusty razor blades into a pool of rubbing alcohol does seem a must. Like it or not, you’re in Customer Service, and since my tuition directly pays your salary, I think I deserve to be treated like a human being. If you don’t like it, here, have a shotgun, there’s the bell tower. Do your job or get the fuck outta Dodge.

I’ve since learned that one of my roommates friends actually fled in tears when she went to ask about minimum credits for a partial minor.

I understand that I am a lowly undergrad, but for fuck’s sake, will you literally explode and die without that condescending tone?

Go fellate yourself with a piece of shark’s skin, you cunt.

2

I’m pretty sure I remember what university you’re at, and I’m sorry. I had, thankfully, minimal contact with the student affairs people - mostly due to the fact that their office is NEVER OPEN.

3

You should complain to whoever managers her. Seriously. Can’t gurantee her manager will do anything, but if he/she does, she won’t see it coming.

4

University admins are always such rays of sunshine. I understand it’s a shitty job, but a minimal level of civility isn’t too much to ask.

5

Heh. I have a habit of turning things around on people like that. I would have asked her, “You seem to be having some trouble. Do YOU have a problem I can help you with?”
When she freaks out, I don’t let her get off, I calmly say, “Give me your supervisor right now.”
It creates a scene, sure, but she’ll know that there’s a way to behave. Besides, yours probably isn’t the first story her supervisor has heard, and even if he doesn’t do anything about it, it gives you the upper hand. Even if she’s a monumental cunt after that exchange, that’s all she can be. Who cares about people like that?

6

I second the suggestion to talk to her supervisor or manager. Even if nothing happens to her that registers on your radar, it will help tremendously with that feeling of impotent rage.

7

She sounds like someone who is used to dealing with young students who don’t snap her attitude back into perspective like older people might (note that I’m not excusing her attitude, just attempting to explain it. There is no excuse for acting like she acted.) She needs to get an administrative job in the real world, where bosses, co-workers, and customers don’t put up with that shit for one hot minute.

Sorry it was such a bad experience for you, ThirdCulture. You could consider doing as Faruiza has mentioned - no one who is supposed to do a job has the right to give you a bad attitude, and you do have a right to politely call someone on it. Just something to think about; you certainly don’t need to feel like you should have said something or stood up for yourself more. She was 100% in the wrong here from what you’ve described.

8

:scratches head in total bewilderment:

9

Thanks for the sympathetic comments! I’ve cooled down somewhat, but I still haven’t decided whether or not to take any action.

On the one hand, this seems to be a problem many students deal with, as I’ve now heard more stories from the same office. If this is as endemic as it seems, it might be good to bring it to the attention of the higher-ups. On the other, I’m loath to make a complaint while my request is pending, so as not to stir things up. Who knows, maybe the whole office has the same attitude, in which case I’d be antagonizing people responsible for some very important transactions. So do I act for the common good or out of self-interest?

One thing is for sure, I can feel a very angry op-ed coming the way of our campus newspaper!

10

There exists the very slim possibility that she is acting out as a result of some tragic chain of events playing out in her world. A brother’s suicide, a mother’s agonizing death following a length illness, a violent, abusive marriage reaches it’s apex, I’m not saying I know what it is, just that she may be exhibiting this because of some other horror in her world.

Of course, if you knew that, you’d have nothing but compassion for her when faced with the acting out in inappropriate fashion. But how can she speak the horror?

Perhaps you could just muster some compassion for her because clearly she needs it, something is terribly amiss in her world, which makes her this way.

11

Dude, she’ll never hit anything with a shotgun from a bell tower. Then she’ll be even more pissed off.

12

You’re way too nice.

If something in her life caused her metamorphosis into the woman described in the OP, maybe she shouldn’t be at work.

People don’t change their behavior just because they’re having a bad day. Bitches get bitchier, but everyone else copes without taking their problems out on others.

13

It did occur to me that something might be amiss in her personal life to make her lash out in the way she did, and I momentarily felt bad… Until I remembered her gossiping animatedly with her colleague, in the course of which she was smiling maliciously, looking more like a cat who got the cream. In the course of the five steps it took from her desk to me her demeanor changed from pleasant water cooler-snarker to supercilious snob.

If there were something disrupting her life to the extent necessary to put her in such a mood (in which care she really shouldn’t be at work), I think it would have carried over more.

14

I believe you’re whooshing us, but in the event that you’re not…sorry, I couldn’t disagree more.

Tragic events in one’s personal life does not give one a blank check to act bitchy to random people at your job.

15

Whereas I have no intrinsic problem with your rant as a whole, I just have to point out that this gave me a cognitive-dissonance headache.

Carry on!

*bolding mine.

16

:smack:

17

Actually, there is an easily accessible target regardless of her location, but she’d need to stretch a bit to reach the trigger.

18

That’s what toes are for!

19

I saw the opposite interactions at my university. Administrative things like dropping classes, adding classes after the semester started, and so on, usually involved waiting in a line. I never saw more examples of privileged and snarky behavior than I saw the students give the staff. I remember when I got to the head of the line, one of the administrative workers apologized for the wait. When I said that it didn’t matter in the greater scheme of things (hey, it was 10 minutes out of my life), she almost cried in gratitude.

The downside to my situation was that you couldn’t very well complain to the parents about what a poor job they did to raise such snot-nosed egocentric assholes. You can, however, complain to someone about the advisor you were exposed to. In my old age, I’ve become a big believer in the well-placed, polite, and coherent complaint.

20

Speaking as someone who has had the joy of managing university staff, my thoughts (in no particular order):

Staff at a university can really suck. You are treated like shit by faculty and students. The faculty consider themselves Gods, and the students consider themselves customers. You are hampered by annoying levels of bureacratic shit that prevents you from doing anything remotely logically. There is minimal upward mobility. The longer you work there, the harder it gets to ever leave. You do it for the awesome hours, more relaxed work schedule, and typically a damned good pension and benefits program.

You MIGHT have been student #10 asking for something that day, the previous 9 having been whining, bitching, moaning. Based on the post, you were great - I am not excusing the actions of the staff.

PLEASE write a note to the person’s boss. I had a staff member when I took over who could be a royal pain - according to rumor. NOBODY would write a comment, so I had nothing to use to fire the bitch. It is VERY hard to fire people at the University once they have been around for awhile without good documentation and justification. I had to start a file on her, ask for students to write me notes, and I built a case. After 6 months the best I could do was convince her to transfer to another area. Give the boss the ammo. Please.