I was in line at the grocery checkout standing behind my buggy. There was a woman with her buggy behind me. I stepped out of line, leaving my cart, to get some nearby chewing gum. In those few moments I had moved the woman behind me moved forward. Now I could not stand behind (and rest my foot on) my buggy.
And it was too late to ask her to move back as the people behind her had already moved forward. what a friggin’ idiot!
I couldn’t resist…I went back and looked. Yeah, it was you alright. You sure you aren’t working for the Calgary Board of tourism? 
Turns out you were pretty much the top contributor in that thread, so don’t be surprised when I come knocking on your door on my next vacation – er, but I’ll take a step back before you open the door. 
I can’t even begin to describe how unlikely that is, nor how amusing the very idea is. But it’s nice to think that a gaggle of 16 year-olds might stumble over me just to get my attention – I appreciate the vote of confidence!
There seems to be some consensus that supermarkets suck for people who like personal space. That probably explains why I only go shopping when I can do the self-checkout.
If you ever do decide to visit Calgary and area, we’ll definitely take you and Jakeline out and wine and dine you (maybe for some Grade A Alberta beef - now, with less BSE!) Ha. I slay me.
Chiming in as another person who needs more personal space than I usually am given. I really should grow a pair, I know, but I just can’t bring myself to open up my mouth and ask someone to step back. The one time I did, it was very much like zelie zelerton’s situation: the old woman behind me refused, and started arguing with me. I looked around for a store employee (this was at self-checkout) to solicit help from, but the nearest one was either too busy, or pointedly ignoring me. I mean, what kind of dimwit thinks that they have a right to breathe down your neck while you’re entering your PIN on the machine?!
Ummm… directional burpage?
When they’re climbing down my neck while I’m trying to swipe my card or sign my slip, I’ll give them the old “Excuuuuse me?” with a glare.
For general stand-to-closers, I prefer the “oblivious” step backwards, enough to either bump into them much more obviously than they did to me or to actually step on their feet if they’re really close. I’m a little possessive of my space.
We have a winner! I’m irritated I never thought of that…
Even the stand-too-closers always have some personal space requirement. Do what I do–turn around to face them, look them in the eye, and stand even closer than they were to you. No need to say anything. They will almost always take an automatic step back. Turn back around and go about your business.
Usually they will remain a step back, but with a few of the more clueless you may have to rinse and repeat.
Of course I recognize that this won’t work for the less confrontational among us.
OMG that’s another thing that peeves!
When you answer the door and there is a person RIGHT at the door. As a child my mother taught me to ring the bell and then take a step back or step off the porch. On account of not wanting to be perceived as trying to force my way into someone’s house when they didn’t necessarily want me there. It really annoys me when there is someone in your face when you answer the door - why would someone do that?
erm…trolley…
I think I have the answer to this one for you - the same reason most people do most things - because it has never occurred to them to NOT do it because it doesn’t affect them.
You know what I think it is? I think there’s a phobia in our society about being made to wait even so much as an extra second. Actually, I don’t know if it’s a phobia, or just hypercompetitiveness. But people seem to have this secret fear that someone will cut in front of them in line, or in traffic when they’re driving, and they’ll lose precious seconds, as well as face. I see this behavior when I’m getting on the bus or the subway, and it’s made worse by a secondary fear people have that the doors will close before they’re on.
But actually, it could be worse. When I was in Africa, the students waiting for the bus would all rush the door as soon as it opened, and you would have to viciously fight through the scrum in order to get aboard. Your personal space counted for about as much as your personal dignity at that point.
I used to be petrified when I had to fart in public, but now there are situations like this where it comes in really handy. Only problem is, if I’m not careful, I get fartprints in the tighty whities.
This is part of the reason why I do my grocery shopping at 11:00pm using the self-checkout. That, and I’ve had people actually have the gall to comment on what it was I was buying.
One time I was just doing a dry run to pick up a few things. I had one lady look at my cart with lowfat milk, yogurt, cereal, and toilet paper and go, “Looks like somebody’s on a diet!” Of course, I responded back with, “Yes, I am. Need some tips? Because whatever diet you’re on isn’t working.”
Another time, it was the cashier herself. I was getting most of the stuff I listed above, with some TV dinners and a few frozen pizzas. She started right in telling me that if I would learn how to cook, I might meet a nice girl. The nerve! I grabbed the toilet paper and asked, “Is this enough toilet paper for the bullshit you’re spewing at me?” She didn’t say another word to me other than, “Here’s your receipt.”
Come to think of it, maybe I need to start going during daylight again. Smacking down those people is kind of fun.
Now why would you go and ruin a good thing like that? This is precisely the kind of person I’d want to run into if I had a cart full of condoms, vaseline, popcorn and baby formula.
Other possibilities:
I think some people have less awareness than others about how much space they are taking up, and whether others need it. (I am reminded of a very narrow store I once worked in with two very wide women: one was always in my way and the other one, never. My husband is very narrow, but he always manages to be in my way for some reason.)
Once I was waiting for a bus. There was one other person at the bus stop.
The bus trundled up, empty. The doors opened. I graciously let the other person go first. She stood in front of the open doors (on the sidewalk) and rummaged in her purse for her fare (and completely blocking my path to the door). Rummage, rummage, rummage. The driver and I watched her do this for a while, until eventually the driver asked if she could get on and let me by. She got on the bus, and resumed her rummaging in front of the farebox, again completely blocking my path onto the bus.
Rummage, rummage, rummage.
Eventually I managed to squeeze past her, sat down in the window side of one of the two-seaters on the (empty) bus.
She comes and sits RIGHT BESIDE ME. Literally. This woman has trapped me with her body three times during the straightforward process of boarding an empty bus, without apparently noticing at all.
I asked her to move, and got up and sat somewhere else. Very unCanadian of me (usually I would just sit quietly and seethe) but I was pretty fed up.
And throughout all this, I don’t think she noticed at all.
In this case I think cattle prods are appropriate. I want one for my keychain.
Exceedingly annoying, and I’ve encountered people like this, but out of curiousity, why did you ask HER to move? Granted, I don’t think you should be forced to move since she was the one who inconvenienced you in the first place – I get that. But unless you think she was intentionally trying to get to you, I’d think she’d get the point more if you disgustedly got up and relocated.
Maybe that’s my non-confrontational mind speaking, though.
This is something that drives me nutty on a regular basis. I’ve been waiting at the stop with someone for 5 minutes and they don’t even bother looking for their fare or pass 'til the bus has pulled up & opened its doors - or I’ve just followed someone down the stairs into the subway & they don’t look for their pass 'til they’ve already wedged their ass into the only working turnstile. Grrr. On the bus I’ve started reaching around them to swipe my pass then pushing past them. Very Bostonian of me. Yes, I’m violating their personal space, but I feel it’s justified when they’re acting like stupid cows.
I think cowgirl meant that she asked Ms. Oblivious to move so cowgirl could get out of the seat and go sit somewhere else.
I don’t get people sitting right next to you when there are lots of other seats available, either. This happens in movies sometimes - Jim and I usually go when the movies are on second-run, and the theatres usually quite empty, so why do people feel the need to sit right in front, back, or beside us? Crowded theatre, popular movie, no problem. Empty theatre - I need about 10 feet of personal space on each side, then (Jim’s allowed within the 10 foot zone, but only by special dispensation. )
Ah, I had the chance to get angry at people for this just the other day. Back the hell up people, the line doesn’t move faster just because you squish me!
I hate it even more when I’ve left a generous gap infront of me, so that people who are walking by (say in a coffee shop) can cut through the line without having to walk around it… and then people creep up behind me and ask “Are you in this line?!”. Yes I am and you don’t have to worry, I won’t let anyone else cut infront of us, this will not affect our waiting time in any way.