Lonely, my ass.
So, you all may have heard me rave about how bleedin’ woooonderful my Maytag Neptune washer and dryer set are. Well, I take it back. I take it all back.
The washer is a front-loader. It’s all eco-friendly and nice to my clothes and all. Well, the damn thing started stalling in the middle of the cycle. And stalls again and again. So we called the Maytag repair hotline. We were told that a service call would be 99 bucks. 99 bucks? The damn thing is less than 3 years old! But it’s out of warranty. Okay fine. It happens.
So we try to schedule an appointment. We can have one in a few days. Great! What time? They can’t tell me that. They say that we will be called at 9 pm the night before the appointment with the time. But we have work. Well, you can have an appointment with the time set in advance, but you might have to wait longer. How long? 3 weeks. Grand. So, we agree to the call-the-night-before thing. The night before, the phone rings. There is a long pause and then a computerized voice starts. Telemarketer! So I hang up. And we don’t get the call to tell us what time the appointment is. So we call the hotline, and we are told that the they use a computerized voice to tell us of the appointment time. Just terrific. What if my (proverbial) 6-year-old had picked up the phone? They could have warned us that it would be an automated voice. But they are able to tell us the time of the appointment. Fine.
So, the Maytag repairman shows up. We’ll call him Kevin. (that’s his name) He asks me the symptoms. I tell him. He tells me there is nothing wrong with the washer. Why does it stall? It’s not stalling now, he says. But we haven’t been able to complete a load of wash in weeks. He says something that strongly implies that I must be imagining things. I firmly tell him that I am not imagining things.
So, he suggests that the door locking mechanism may be flawed. Fine, replace it. So he does, and charges me $70 for the part. He assures me it’s working fine, so I pay him and he leaves. I notice after he leaves that he has left all the parts and junk in my slop sink.
So, my husband calls the hotline and yells at them. They agree to cover the cost of the part as a “concession” for the guy eing a slob. Okay fine.
So, we go to do a load of wash, and the damn thing stalls again! And again! So we call the hotline and ask what they’re gonna do about it. Well, we can have another service call. Will we have to pay? Yes. I think not. Okay, no. When can we have this service call. 5 days. But we haven’t had clean clothes in weeks! 5 days. Can you tell me what time? No. You’ll be called the night before. But your guy didn’t fix it the first time! Nothing we can do. And can we have a different service guy, because Kevin didn’t know how to fix it. No, we have to have Kevin, because he “knows the history of the machine.” Oy vey.
So, we try to coax a load through the machine, and miracle of miracles, it works! And it works for the next load too. So we cancel the appointment. The next day, it stalls.
So we call the hotline again and make another appointment. This time, my husband manages to convince them to send another guy.
We go through the rigamarole of the “call the night before” thing yet again. Ezra shows up. He asks me the symptoms. I tell him. He spends some time with the machine, and determines that the motor is completely whacked. And why is that? Because the motherboard is fucked, and it managed to kill the motor. I said, how did you know? He said that he suspected that the motor was the problem when I told him the symptoms, and upon investigation of the motor, he found the computer problem. Yay! He spends several hours replacing everything, and it now works. Terrific. He leaves.
An hour or so later, he calls me from the road to tell me that he had forgotten to tell me that they now have a way to fix a minor ongoing problem with that model of washer–water left in the wash barrel. They will come out at no charge and install the fix. Great! And I can schedule it at my convenience. Maybe there is some up-side to this ordeal.
So we got to enjoy our wonderful working washer for all of a week, when we notice something odd–the dryer is not turning itself off. It has a “moisture sensor,” so it will turn itself off when the clothes are dry and not dry them longer than necessary. Saves money and is better for the clothes. But apparently, it’s broken. Fabulous. But there is still the regular timer. So I put a down comforter in there and turn on the timer. 6 hours later, I happen downstairs, and discover the dryer is still on. Shit. The comforter was fine and all, but we were rather unpleased to see that the whole timer was shot.
So, we spent a couple of weeks with an un-timed dryer, because we were so loath to call the hotline again. We turned on a kitchen timer to remind us to manually turn off the dryer. Finally, my husband got too sick of this, and called the hotline again. They said they’d send someone out, but it would cost 99 dollars. So, my husband basically told them that their dryer was a fire hazard, so they’d better send someone out at their own cost. Okay, they’d do it for free. WTF? (The lesson, here, kids, is that you can easily get out of paying the 99 dollars…so you’re a sucker if you pay. A great way to do business.) So, we go through the whole appointment thing again.
We asked if they could do the fix on the washer at the same time. They said no, that has to be done on it’s own, separate appointment, because it’s a “concession.” Another wonderful day of waiting for the Maytag Repairman.
The van pulls in at 1 today…and who gets out but Kevin, the guy who doesn’t know his motherboard from his locking mechanism. Greeeat. I tell him what the problem is and leave him alone with the dryer. 5 minutes later, he tells me that the thing has no problem–it is advancing. I say that it is most certainly not advancing. He, again, says, something that strongly implies that it must be my imagination. I said to him, “this is the second time you’ve been here and failed to fix the problem.” He said “yeah, how often does it happen?” I said “at least a dozen times.” He looked at me as if I were nuts, and I realized that he was asking me how many times he’d been there, not how many times we’d observed the timer not working. So I said, “this is the second time you’ve been here. We have seen the timer not work at least a dozen times.” His response? “Well, it’s working now.”
I suggest that he try with some clothes in it, and I just happened to have a wet load in the washer. So, he agrees to that. I put the load in the dryer–a load which includes some polartec fleece and a couple of bras. In other words, stuff that should not be dried on “high.” So I turn it down to medium and turn it to the timer option and turn it on. 5 minutes later he says it is working.
Then he says he could replace the timer anyway, as he has the part. I asked if there would be any charge. He said no, as it was a “concession.” I said to replace the part. 10 minutes later, he says he is done, and just needs my signature. I go to sign, and he tells me that he replaced the part at his own cost. I said, I thought it was a concession. He said that it comes out of his own pocket. I really wanted to say, “are you trying to make me feel guilty, you condescending jerk?” But I just wanted to be done with him, so I signed and sent him on his way.
A few minutes later, I went back downstairs to check on things…and found the fucker had turned the dryer BACK UP TO HIGH! :mad: And it was on the “timer” option, not the motion sensor option, so it’s not like he had any vested interest in getting the clothes dry faster. What an asshole. It’s time to write a letter to the company.
Fucking Maytag repairman. No wonder he’s lonely. He’s a jerk.