The New Marmite Horror: Marmageddon!

I used to work with a guy in his 60s who said he grew up (in the U.S.) with a similar product called Vegex (which he pronouced ‘VEE-jex’). I don’t know where it was made, but it sounded like it was common enough a few decades ago.

In fairness, Ireland doesn’t either. Imported Marmite from the UK is available in supermarkets but it is in no way popular. Which is ironic as Marmite began as a by-product of Guinness.

It’s also, in my opinion, more stickier and tar-like than the British Marmite, which has a smoother, browner look. Also you can distinguish the two because British Marmite is how you people lost the Empire, and NZ Marmite was bestowed upon us by the gods.

I will have to call my friends in Christchurch and extend my deepest sympathies.

As one who has never aquired a taste for turpentine in a gel form, nor had a hankering to spread black toe-jam from a Russian gulag on my toast, I can offer no first hand solice.

However, due to heavy rains and a poor peanut harvest this year, the price of Skippy Super-Chunk peanut butter has risen dramatically.

Thus, I can offer a sympathetic ear to your woe, as long as I do not have to offer a sympathetic nose and can remain at least 100 yards of an open container of anything that ends with the letters “…ite”.

I thought about buying it but it’s bloody expensive, especially if it turned out to taste like shit.