Set in fictional 1930’s Kansas, amidst a backdrop of colorfully eccentric small-town types, Clark Kent (George Clooney) is the well-liked reporter for the “Smallville Gazette.” In the middle of his usual beat of farm reports, he stumbles upon what appears to be a kidnapping of popular folk singing local celebrity Lana Lang (Frances McDormand) that threatens to rock Smallville to the core. Taking it upon himself to solve the mystery and rescue the girl, Kent encounters a series of bizzare characters that only deepen the plot in this screwball comedy. Upon determining that the kidnapper is his old high school nemesis Lex Luthor (John Turturro), Kent is shocked to discover that Lana was merely on tour with Kent’s estranged twin Mark (John Goodman) who engineered the plot as payback for being nicknamed “Bizarro Clark” as children. Also stars Steve Buscemi as Brandon “Braniac” Ackerson, who suffers an untimely death involving a milking machine.
You think that’s bad? I heard that there was once a Superman movie in production that starred Christopher Reeve! I mean, come on, that guy can’t even walk!
I just about broke down and cried when I heard the Ashton Kutcher rumor–I hadn’t thought anything could be worse than Nicolas Cage. And as much as I love all things Superman (hell, I even watch Smallville), the only time I was even vaguely excited about a new movie was back when Kevin Smith was involved.
Please, please, please, Hollywood, don’t mess with a good thing. sigh
