The more noises I make standing up and sitting down.
The less I am able to actually sit on the floor.
The less interested I am in going out over staying home and getting a good night’s sleep.
The faster time seems to go by.
The earlier I get up. I don’t sleep in as much as I did when I was younger.
The more I cherish my kids, because I know they will move out before I know it. Most of the time, anyhow.
The more I want to do more, be more, and save more money.
The more I appreciate time spent with my parents.
…the bigger it gets.
(Prostate, cataract, social security check)
I’ve got a low (maybe a foot off the floor?) footstool that I now use for sitting on when I’m doing something that 10 years ago I would have sat on the floor to do – assemble Ikea furniture, put away CDs, etc.
What a fantastic idea! Time to go footstool shopping!
I realise I’m still the nicest person I ever met.
Now get off my fucking lawn, I won’t tell you again you bunch of arsewiping fuckers 
Moving thread from IMHO to MPSIMS.
…the better I was.
No, actually, for me it works the other way. Moments of stupidity that I obsess over now probably didn’t amount to anything when they happened.
…the more frequently I have to get up at night to pee.
…the less I want to go out for the evening and the more I want to stay home and read with/to my kids.
Yep I would have to agree with AskNott
I feel the older I have gotten the better overall I have gotten.
I eat better, am in better shape, more even tempered, more easy going and good natured, much more happy about life and my spouse. I make a hell of a lot more money then I did when I was younger and can pretty much afford anything I want. I used to worry about being accepted in my position and then one day realized I am ‘the man’ and the old gray bearded guy!
All in all
the older I gets the better I gets!
now get off my lawn
…the smarter my parents get.
Mine too! 
except, I’m a guy. 
… the less ambient store music I can tolerate. Only Home Depot plays oldies that are old enough.
The older I get, the more I think Dorian Corey was spot-on:
the more tired I get.
the less tolerant I get.
the crankier I get.
Did I mention tired?
I’m really, really tired.
The older I get, the more I wish I’d taken lots more “risks” when I was younger. I say “risks” because the things I contemplated weren’t really dangerous. They were adventurous, and I should have followed my muse.
That’s funny, because I did all those risky things, ran off and joined the circus as it were. Had some incredible adventures but now I’m starting late in life at some things, just bought a house, not married, having no kids. I kind of look at my comtemporaries who’ve got families and a secure retirement and wish I’d been a little less of a wandering adventurer.
…the further away the Social Security Administration sets my retirement age. :mad: What’s up with that??
The older I get, the more appropriate it is to have crushes on my high school teachers. (Since I work with them now.)
Only if you also keep your own skin.
This sounds like the start of a dangerous decline! 
Why? The older I get, the more I think many of those things are merely prisons we create for ourselves because everyone else is.
Also, the older I get, the more I realize most people don’t really give a shit what I do and how unimportant it is if they do. I mean think how important having the “right group of friends” in high school or college seemed and how important those people actually are 10 years later (I mean the ones you didn’t keep in touch with).
Of course, the older I get, the more I realize how important the people you do stay in touch with over the years are.