You actually can fix stupid, provided you’re using ‘fix’ in the sense of ‘neuter or spay’!
“If they’ll do it to someone else, they’ll eventually do it to you.” Also see: “Leopards don’t change their spots.”
Phew, some hard-learned lessons related to these sayings hath been learned by me . . .
According to Tom Lehrer (I think it was) it was an engineer who said it.
One I learned right here: Never try to argue someone out of an opinion they didn’t argue themselves into.
I had a high school graduating class of 19, and one of them killed himself two years out of school. When I told my dad, he replied: “That’s the price of knowing people.”
It wasn’t so pithy as it was just brutally true.
You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?
There are two types of people in the world. 1) Those who can can extrapolated from incomplete data.
When talking about a plant, pithy does mean full of pith, but when referring to advice, it means an idea forcefully expressed with very few words. Of coarse, part of the effectiveness of any statement is going to depend on the situation. Here, some pithy advice for you would be, “Find a new dictionary.” The pithiest advice I ever got was, “F off!” Again, its effectiveness relied haavily on the situation, but at that time and place, it was excellent advice.
Never take advice from the guy sitting across from you at the poker table.
A salesman always knows what is best…for himself.
Also - if you can’t immediately spot the sucker at the poker table, it’s you.
This too shall pass.
“Truth” and “Fact” are not usually synonymous, and “Right” and “Wrong” are not usually antonymous.
My sister once told me to “run your own boat.” I don’t know why she worded it that way, but it’s a good thought: DO IT YOURSELF. Do not expect any one else to do it for you.
My mum used to say this. Very true, on every level.
“CYA…consult your attorney.”
Real boats rock.
After I turned 50 I had a small accident where I had to go to the ER for pulled muscles in my back. The doctor gave me some good advice:
1/ Never pass up a chance to use the bathroom when you have the chance.
2/ Never trust a fart (for obvious reasons).
3/ Never waste an erection. He didn’t seem to concerned when I told him I currently didn’t have an SO.
#'s 1 and 2 have come in handy several times.
Two more.
*He who laughs, lasts.
*
and, for old folks:
Don’t let your ass be higher than your head.
Dreams about going to the bathroom never end well.
When you get older, the best part of waking up is self-evident.