Oh you’d like that, wouldn’t you?
So how YOU doin’?
Are you flirting with me?
Do you want me to? 
Why not?
Is halitosis a good enough reason?
On the internet, does that really matter?
How do I know you’re not a 90-year old guy pretending to be a 25-year old supermodel?
Why would you care?
How do I know you’re not a 25 year old supermodel pretending to be a 90 year old guy?
Would that be a problem?
Are you saying I have a problem?
Did you know that the first step is admitting it?
How do you get from here to there?
Do you need a map?
Why, are you lost?
Can’t I leave you people alone for 24 hours without someone starting a fight?!
Have you accepted Jeebus as your savior?
Can I see his resumé first?
Do you mean his curriculum vitae?