Doper-Babes: Is there some sort of Sacred Chick Law that says “Perfume can only be applied once a day, so you have to use plenty?”
Where I work, some woman who gets to work about 3-5 minutes before me (I’ve arrived early and bumped into her, to my disgust) apparently gets her perfume in multi-gallon-containers from Slutco™ judging from the amount she must be using. And the smell lingers. Every day, when I arrive, I can smell her leavings throughout the whole walk in, even though it’s a 2-3 minute walk to the front door in an outdoor parking lot near a highway. Usually by the time I’ve arrived she’s already inside, I could (and on a bet once, did) close my eyes and follow the trail of stink into the building, bloodhound style.
I don’t know what she’s using, but it’s simultaniously icky-sweet and has the skunky, musky odor of dead animals that once were in heat. (Imagine Maple Syrup, Flowers and Cat Piss, mixed.)
Normally, I walk about 20 yards away from the bimbo-shaped trail of stench; parallelling it. A dark spot in each morning is the inevitable moment when, due to basic geometery, I must cross her path and encounter the dark, fetid miasma of her noisesome stench, my nostrils are becoming calloused from the abrasion caused by her .
Luckily, once inside, she’s nowhere near my department, so as long as I don’t use the elevator for 30 minutes or so after getting in, it’s not too much of a problem. (And it’s forcing me to take the stairs which are better for me anyway).
But…why? I’m sure she’s suffocating the others in her office (the windows don’t open in this building). What does she think she’s accompishing? Isn’t gas warfare prohibited by the Geneva Convention? I want to tell her “Trust me, babe. No guy thinks that a woman smelling of a gallon of cat-piss and maple syrup is erotic.”
Fenris