Scientist and professional masochist Justin Schmidt has had himself deliberately stung by a wide range of insects in order to rank the severity of the pain so induced. The result is the Schmidt Sting Pain Index. The scale ranges from 1.0 for the lowly sweat bee, all the way up to 4.0 for the bullet ant, so named because the pain of its sting is reportedly akin to being shot.
The worst thing I’ve ever been stung by was a yellowjacket. It was extremely painful, and the resulting yellowjacket paranoia has kept me from a repeat performance for 22 years now. I was embarrassed to learn that yellowjackets only rank a 2.0 on the scale; turns out I’m a wuss afterall.
So what have you been stung by? What’s your rank on the Schmidt Sting Pain Index?
I have a hard time taking any pain scale seriously when the descriptions include such gems as ‘Light, ephemeral, almost fruity.’
But, given that, the last sting I received was from a paper wasp which is a level 3.0 on this scale. Let’s see… how did Schmidt describe this?
“Caustic and burning. Distinctly bitter aftertaste. Like spilling a beaker of hydrochloric acid on a paper cut.”
I suppose the first is accurate, but the second?
I do not experience pain as a taste.
Perhaps Dr. Schmidt has a form of synesthesia.
And how, pray tell, might one determine the validity of the third statement?
I know the man is described as a masochist, but hydrochloric acid on a paper cut?
Sheeesh.
I was stung about 20 times on my lower legs by yellowjackets in one day when I was a teenager. They were congregating around a bridge I had to cross as part of a job I was doing, and I couldn’t run past them because of an injury I was recovering from. They stung me each time I hobbled by.
I was bitten by an assassin (wheel) bug as a kid. It was by far the most painful bite/sting I have ever experienced, even more painful than a wasp sting that left a bloody welt. i was bitten on the finger, and it left my whole hand numb for several hours.
I’ve been stung by yellowjackets, honeybees, bumblebees, and bald-faced hornets.
I strongly disagree with the listed index, which states that the sting of yellowjackets is equal in pain to the bald-faced hornet. In my opinion, the bald-faced hornet sting is far, far more painful - excrutiatingly so.
Edit: also, anyone willing to be stung by one just to find out what it feels like must be nuts, or insensitive to pain; either way, their accounts cannot be relied on.
I’ve been stung by yellow jackets and baldfaced hornets. Neither were high on my pain register; I flung the baldfaced hornet right into a killing jar after he stung me and I only used a few swears in the process.
I jumped or fell off buildings and never was in pain. I only became concerned because I couldn’t walk anymore.
However, Salmonella and E Choli were different. I think I made up new swears to describe those.
Cow killers, anyone? Those things have 1/4 inch long stingers. Great swelling and pain- bright cherry red skin for inches around each of three stings on one leg.
(Less colloquially, velvet ants- beautiful, solitary, wingless wasps.)
I’ve been stung by Bullet ants twice, by a stingray once.
Hornets, fire ants, wasps, bees, caterpillars, etc… the only thing that even remotely compared to the Bullet ant sting was the stingray.
Bullet ants HURT!!! The pain was severe and shocking and overwhelming and came along with a sense of severe malaise / “critical damage sustained”, sort of like if you’ve ever cut yourself deeply or broken a bone and right after the injury, your thoughts get panicky and loop on repeat “Oh no! oh no! oh no! This is Bad!” And it goes on and on and on for hours.
Anyone who intentionally gets stung by a Bullet ant is either unbelievably devoted to their work, extraordinarily masochistic, or really naive/dumb.
Schmidt seems to feel that “W. C. Fields extinguishing a cigar on your tongue” isn’t quite as bad as “a matchhead that flips off and burns on your skin.” :dubious:
And of course, using “a running hair drier has been dropped into your bubble bath” as a description of pain is just fantasy.
Oh, I’ve been stung by paper wasps (3.0) several times. There were plenty of them round the place I grew up.
Been stung by everything up to paper wasp. Got repeated stings from paper wasps back in 1992ish[might have been 1993] catching and carrying chickens into the barn up a small set of steps that had a paper wasp nest underneath. There was a huge thunderstorm rolling in, with tornado warnings and I didn’t want the chickens left out because they were still almost babies and were out ‘tempering’ and didn’t have a real hen house built at the time. I had 20-30 stings on each leg, and 10-20 on each arm, and some on my face and neck. Luckily I am not allergic to bee/yellowjacket/wasp stings. They actually reduce faster than mosquito bites on me.
I would put the pain of pseudogout at a similar level, though trying to walk on pseudogout flare is about like trying to walk on a freshly broken bone that shock has not killed the nerve pain on.
Menstrual cramps on me felt like someone reached up my ass, grabbed a handfull of intestines and was twisting at the same time they were drawing them out.
I’m digging the description of what it feels like to get stung by a bullet ant: “like fire-walking over flaming charcoal with a 3-inch rusty nail in your heel.” He probably could’ve just said “like getting shot” but he had to go for the drama (probably because he’d just been stung by a bullet ant :D). Pretty intense.
My worst insect sting was a honeybee. I was five. My mom and I were driving to the grocery store, and on the way there, I felt a burning sensation in my left thigh. I lifted myself up a bit and found that I was sitting on a bee, which had made its way into the car somehow :eek:. That one’s a 2.x, but I think it was mostly traumatic because of the surrounding circumstances rather than the sting–it certainly hurt, but I think I was more upset that “ewww I sat on a bee!!!” In any case, mom turned the car around and we headed home so she could treat the sting.
My worst sting, period, was probably a jellyfish sting, so I guess that doesn’t count (unless there’s an index for those, too). It wasn’t so much the sting as it was the angry red welts that formed in a spiral up my arm a bit later. It looked as though the jellyfish was trying to grab me.
@Maastricht: Ha, I saw that one too. I like that scale.
I’ve been stung by all sorts of nasty insects. I’d put yellowjackets at the bottom of the scale, then wasps, but the worst was a big-ass bumblebee. Nailed me right in the middle of my thumb pad. Maybe that’s why it hurt so much–the location, but Jesus Christ, did that hurt.
Funny nobody has mentioned fire ants. I’ve never had the pleasure. I wonder what they’re like?
Fire ants are pretty meh, one at a time… They feel like maybe a deerfly bite when they sting, then an itchy white pustule develops. The real problem with them is they gang up on you- a bunch will crawl on you and then seem to all sting on cue. There are people with allergies for whom it’s much worse.
