"Can’t talk, coming down," Lisa says this when she gets home after ingesting some substance.
This has to be my all time favorite:
"Good rice, Good curry, Good Ghandi, Let’s hurry!" Apu’s grace before a meal he ate with the Simpson’s.
This isn’t a qoute but I find it quite hysterical. Homer and family are buying a pool and the sign on the shop says, "Pool Sharks - Where the Buyer is our Chum."
Damn, there goes my typing finger again. I hate misspelled words.
Oh, and I nearly forgot–the fact that Homer bought his gun at BLOODBATH AND BEYOND still makes me giggle. To this day I can’t pass a BED, BATH AND BEYOND without smirking.
Kent Brockman: I for one welcome our new insect overlords.
I can’t believe I forgot about the insect overlords! I absolutely love that one. Thanks for the reminder!
The red haired, Scottish janitor, Willie is hilarious. Also, the foreign exchange student is funny.
So, where is this Simpson’s Springfield? Ha Ha! We already covered that in the GQ forum.
The Simpsons show is getting old, though. I prefer South Park now. At least they are absolutely clear where the town is located, Colorado.
One of Troy McClure’s funniest greetings:
Hi, I’m Troy McClure, you might remember me from such educational films as “Designated Drivers, the life saving nerds.”
My two favorites are #1, the one where Mr. Burns brings in all the professional baseball players to work at the plant so they can be on his baseball team. Favorite quote (I forget which player, but after he receives a near lethal dose of radiation): “Can’t…lift…arm…or …speak…at…normal…rate…” and when Mr. Burns comes up with the brilliant strategy of having Darryl Strawberry hit a home run (“okie-dokie, skip!”): “I told him to do that!”
#2, the “Hullabalooza” episode that features Peter Frampton and the Smashing Pumpkins. “What are you kids so down about?”
“You’re right! We’re millionaires – I’m going to go buy a mink bikini!”
Anything out of Ralph Wiggum’s mouth is sheer genius. “Mrs. Krabappel? My red crayon is missing.” (With red crayon debris ringing his mouth.) “My cat’s name is Mittens!” “I sure am glad you cho-cho-chose me!” and who can ever forget “I saw principal Skinner and Mrs. Krabappel in the closet and they were making a baby and I saw the baby and it smiled at me!”
And my favorite quote of all is from Grandpa, used frequently in our household whenever someone is rambling incoherently: “I wore an onion on my belt, which was the style at the time…”
Oh, man…I totally forgot. “The steel industry’s been gay for years, Homer…Everyone knows that!” and the end where it’s dedicated to the Steel Workers of America “Keep reaching for that rainbow!”
and of course, the Pulp Fiction episode. Is that the one entitled “33 short films about Springfield?” I couldn’t believe it when they actually showed Chief Wiggum tied up with that ball in his mouth. For anyone who’s seen Pulp Fiction (and who hasn’t) that is so daring and bold, I can’t get over it.
The “22 Short Films” episode was a spoof of “32 Short Films About Glen Gould” - and I’ve never seen such an esoteric reference before in my life. The original was about Glen Gould, a Canadian pianist and total wacko.
The Pulp Fiction parody was in that episode, but it was only part of it.
The thing that I love about the Simpsons is that it isn’t afraid to use stuff like obscure artsy films or Gilbert and Sullivan. My all-time favourite episode is the one in which Sideshow Bob performs the entire HMS Pinafore while trying to kill Bart. It’s not dumbed down half as much as most TV.
Exactly why I love it, Eris–as per my quotes above, what other TV show–on ANY channel, let alone Fox!?–would make a reference to Zelda Fitzgerald, Frances Farmer and Sylvia Plath?
How about Homer’s soul donut. Flanders as the Devil: “It’s always the person you least expect, Homer.” And the jury of the damned with the '76 Flyers and Richard Nixon.
Nixon (appearing): “But I’m not dead.”
Flanders/Devil: “Quiet! I’ve done you some favors.”
Nixon: “Yes, Master.”
LOL Markxxx. So glad you quoted that gun episode. Laughed uncontrollably when you reminded me of that line 
Here’s one of my favorite Simpsons quotes:
[Bart was caught shoplifting and his parents have found out]
Homer: “I’ve figured out the boy’s punishment. First: he’s grounded. No leaving the house, not even for school. Second: no eggnog. In fact, no nog, period. And
third, absolutely no stealing for three months.”
What a great thread, I’m just busting a gut over these. It’s like an all punchline episode!
“Mrs. Krabappel, are you trying to seduce me?”
I almost forgot the Paul McCartney episode. Lisa decides to become a vegetarian and the family is eating breakfast; Lisa refuses to eat bacon.
Homer: “What about sausage?”
Lisa: “NO!”
Homer: “What about ham?”
Lisa: “Daaaad, all those products come from the same animal”.
Homer: “Oh, suuuuure, Lisa. Some kind of wonderful, maaaaagical animal.”
Apu loses his job at the kwiky mart and moves in with the simps, he sings ‘who needs the kwiky mart’ the family joins in at the end each singing a line that ends with a rhyme with ‘mart’, homer has the last line,‘the kwiky marts the place …DOH!’
“Saxamaphoooone” The entire bit with the big man in the little car. ‘doh! nuts! mmmmm doooonuts’ homer in the land of chocolate Admit it folks ,watching the Simpsons embiggens us all.
“…”-Marx
DOH! How could i forget the musical version of Planet of the Apes? And the whole something ‘fishy’ about Troy?
Oh, just one more…from the Michael Jackson episode when Bart is writing Lisa a birthday jingle.
“Lisa! Her teeth are big and green.
Lisa! She smells like gas-o-line!
Lisa! da da da Disa,
You are my sister, your birthday, I missed-a!”
Also when Marge is on hold calling the mental hospital and the hold Musak is Patsy Clines’ “Crazy”
Yep. It’s Marge’s response when, after getting Itchy & Scratchy toned down for violence, she’s expected to fight against Michelanglo’s David for its obscenity.
For those of you wondering what quote… here it is:
“I guess it is possible for one person to make a difference, although most of the time they probably shouldn’t.”
cue 80’s pop music
Help,
the humans,
are about to escape.
Get your hands off of me,
you dirty ape.
gasp
He can talk
he can talk he can talk he can talk
he can talk he can talk he can talk…
I can siiiiinnnngg!
Ooh, help me Dr. zaius
refrain:
dr. zaius, dr. zaius
dr. zaius, dr. zaius
dr. zaius, dr. zaius
ooooh, dr. zaius.
dr. zaius, dr. zaius
What’s wrong with me?
I think your crazy.
I want a second opinion.
You’re all so lazy.
Refrain.
Can I play the piano anymore?
Of course you can.
Cuz I couldn’t before.
Refrain x 2
I hate every ape I see
from chimpan-a to chimpanze
and you’ll never make a monkey
out of meee.
Oh my god, I was wrong
it was earth all along,
you finally make a monkey…
Yes we finally made a monkey…
Yes you finally made a monkey
Out of meeeee!
I love you Dr. Zaius!