I was in this situation just two weeks ago - a very good friend died. We all knew she was gravely ill but didn’t think it was going to be so soon. Her sister called me at 4am - I had left the hospital about 6 hours earlier. I knew I wasn’t going to get back to sleep, but I waited until 7am, when most people would be getting up for work, to notify the people I had been asked to call. I didn’t see any point in waking them up with bad news when there wasn’t anything they could do anyway.
My Dad had a heart attack around 3am and didn’t make it to the hospital. I was at the racetrack with friends 5 hours away. My stepmother waited until 7am to call us. She didn’t want me driving the RV home in the middle of the night out of my mind.
Prudent decision.
If someone in my family dies, and I expect to be at the funeral, I better be told right away, day or night. Jewish funerals are normally held within 24 hours of the death, if at all possible, and much of my family lives across the country from me. So I have to start booking my plane tickets immediately if I hope to have any chance of making it to the funeral in time.
Ed
If it is a close family member and I should go to the house to help, wake me up. If I am just expected to go to the wake it a day or two, it can wait. Or you can do it like my mother, “Didn’t I tell you that Aunt Betty died? I know I told your sister.” There are four of us. At least one is always left out of the information loop. At least it rotates, she’s not playing favorites.
As part of my job, I have to make death notification calls to next of kin when U.S. citizens die overseas. (The least favorite part of my job.) There is almost always a time difference so my general rule is if it’s after midnight where the NOK lives, I wait until it’s 06:00 or 07:00 there before making the call. However, as Suranyi noted, if I know that the person is of a religious denomination that requires speedy burial, I’ll call immediately, regardless of time.