You know, not the hero guy but the not quite so cute guy who is smart and has a crush on the main girl but she see’s him only as a friend. (a really good friend!) Dejected as the Dope Fest of Doom breaks up into pairs of people making out and alas there is nobody for me. I drunkenly walk outside to pine for my sweetie who is going down on a dumb jock. (how’d he get to the dope fest!) After I round a corner some sort of long spear impales me through my ribs. A flash of lighting casts a shadow of myself being held aloft by the killer’s shadow.
[Hint hint] Later the girl I have a crush on will hide in a closet somewhere as the killer is in high gear. She sees my face and reaches out to me only to have me fall limply over her. Yeah, this will happen later to some scantliy clad chick. /[Hint Hint]
I’ll be the sarcastic, witty guy who hangs out with the hero and his (now deceased) friend Zebra, and cracks jokes about everything going on. For some reason, I’ll be the only one who notices what’s going on, and sees the pattern emerging at the dopefest.
Hopping into my car, I speed off to find the hero and warn him. Alas, I get a flat from a conveniently placed dead body, and have to pull off. I hear a noise in the woods, whell around, and the camera cuts to black as I scream bloody murder.
(Later, when the hero is fighting the murderer, who stands ready to impale him with a joystick, a gunshot rings out, the killer falls, and I walk out from the doorway holding a pistol, saying some witty comment. As it turns out, the guy in the woods was just THespos, coming to tell me, in his own creepy manner, who the killer is.)
hey no takers for Hero??? wow never thought i’d get to do the honors. Well i’m the hero who the sexy heroine is gong out with but she suspects him in the middle but in the end the real killer comes after her,only minutes before finishing me off.
However i am not dead(surprise surprise!!!) and i manage to kill the villain and it turns out to be…
well in the end i get the sexy heroine.
WOW…thanks for letting me be the hero
Hey but thats already been done in the blair witch. Come on, does the hero really have to die.
I’d rather be the killer than have to die…unless i get to do one of those lingering death scenes where he is trying to kill me off but i am not dying and so the suspense is intense. I always have enough life to keep saving the sexy heroine. However to everyone’s surprise one of the killer’s attempts at killing me succeeds and that too after the audience was so damn sure i would live till the end.
This would be a first 'cos ussually if anyone has to die,they just do so quickly, all the lingering scene people or the people who survive enough for ambulances to come ALWAYS survive.
I’ll be the G-man who shows up at the end and empties two Guv’mint .45s into the villian just as he’s about to kill the only survivor, a scantily-clad female. Then I’ll have to comfort her…
I wanna be the sassy, cynical side-kick of the main character [andygirl] who doesn’t get killed until near the end, in some violently bloody way while saying some sassy retort. “Um, like, this movie sucks anyways gets stabbed violently, head gets chopped off, yadda yadda”
Ooo! Oooo! Can I be the really paranoid chick who sits, huddled in a corner, rocking back and forth while her friends are being knocked off one by one?
Then, later in the movie, it’s revealed that through some past childhood trauma, I’ve become severly unhinged and started working with the killer…
But, I get creeped out by the way the killer is acting and attempt to go to the police. Unfortunitly, the killer discovers this and kills me is some bizarre and totally bloody way.
