The Thing's Dick (Fantastic Four)

Cafe Society
21

Napalm…

22

Lava

23

When Sue ever got mad at Reed and wanted to punish him, do you think she ever put a force field, y’know, down…there?

Or worse, do you think she ever put a really, really supersmall force field right around Reed’s own…um…thing?

24

And I bet you aren’t surprised that there’s cartoon porn showing exactly that.

25

erm, ahhhh, . . . cite?

26

Please, for the love of God, I need my brain unbroken to write my papers tonight…

27

Is that how he refers to his hand?

28

Also, I humbly submit this to you Dopers.

29

Wow, it’d save them a fortune in condoms! :stuck_out_tongue:

30

He certainly wouldn’t need viagra. But I think the women in his life still just take it for granite…

31

That’s like rubbing basalt into the wound.

32

But what do you think we’re all about here?

Fighting igneous since 1973

33

Gneiss. Very gneiss.

34

"It’s Sperminatin’ Time!!!"

35

He might not have a dick, but he can still get his rocks off.

d&r…

36

[Chuck Berry]
My Thing-A-Ling.
My Thing-A-Ling.
I want to play with
My Thing-A Ling.
[/Chuck Berry]

37

I can’t talc it anymore.

38

Oh, for schist sake!

39

I knew I should’ve posted this in GQ…

There is no mystery, no questions behind Mr. Fantastic’s dick. We all know what it does, and that makes it less interesting to me. The only thing I know about the Thing’s dick is that it’s circumcised and yes OBVIOUSLY I’ve seen Mallrats.

40

He’ll just have to manage asbestos he can.