This week, members of the International Olympic Committee are visiting Toronto to review Toronto’s bid for the 2008 Summer Olympics. They’re being squired around town and put up at the ritziest hotels and being told how wonderful Toronto is and about all the stadia we’ll build and all the volunteers there will be. The city and provincial government, as well as the representatives for our amateur athletic organizations, are pretty much doing everything they can to fellate the IOC folks, figuratively and, as rumours would have it, literally.
So far bid preparation has cost the taxpayer millions, and will cost millions more.
What a massive, colossal pile of bullshit.
The odds of Toronto hosting the 2008 Olympic Games are roughly equivalent to the odds of the planet Neptune hosting the Olympic Games. The only way Toronto is getting the Olympics is if Beijing, Paris, Osaka and Istanbul are all wiped out by meteors before the IOC holds its vote. We have no chance whatsoever. This entire process is a colossal sham; anyone without blinders on can see that the IOC has already decided to give the Games to Beijing, with Paris being the backup choice.
Toronto has no real plan for building Olympic venues and no plan for funding any of this beyond massive taxation, which if history is any guide will not even be close to recouped in revenue. The city is utterly unprepared for this and won’t be ready in 2008. Of course, none of that matters, because the members of the IOC consider only four things when awarding the Games:
- Cash bribes
- Non-cash bribes
- Whores
- Trying to get to different continents every now and then
The actual qualifications of the host city and the bid committee mean dick all, as evidenced by the decision to give the Olympics to Atlanta.
Not that it matters. The IOC decided to give this Games to Beijing long ago, because Beijing has doubtlessly redoubled their bribery since Sydney out-bribed them for the 2000 Games. If you actually think the IOC’s nominal “Reforms” changed any of this, you’re fucking retarded. The Olympics are a cesspool of greed, fraud, graft, lying, political backstabbing and avarice on a grand scale.
This whole Toronto bid is an embarassment and a waste of time and money on so many levels I don’t know who to tell to go fuck themselves first. The behaviour of our politicians in blowing the IOC’s cocks is embarassing on two levels; first, because it’s embarassing to watch our leaders falling all over themselves to prove Toronto’s worth to a pack of inbred multi-titled fucksticks whose “qualifications” to make these decisions for the IOC consist entirely of being able to rate luxury hotel rooms (Toronto got 8/10 for luxury hotel rooms for the IOC - it’s an honest-to-God rating category. Really.) drink, and call up escort services. Secondly, it’s embarassing to see them going through this ridiculous dog-and-pony show for what any seven-year-old can see is a scam of the most transparent and offensive nature. Everyone knows it’s going to Beijing. If the Toronto shitheads had half a brain they’d know this. If they had a full brain they would have known that competing for an irreperably corrupt sporting festival against a vicious Communist dictatorship, which doesn’t have the slightest moral or ethical compunction against cheating in every conceivable fashion or enslaving or murdering its own citizens for the sake of convenience in making their “bid,” is a pretty fucking stupid waste of time and money anyway and is frankly above the citizens of a civilized nation, and wasn’t worth the price of a postage stamp to send a letter to Geneva telling the IOC to jam the 2008 Games straight up their smelly shitholes.
We’re being played for fools AND being asked to pay for it, and our idiot “leaders” respond to this insult by putting on clown suits and playing with cream pies for the IOC’s amusement. It’s like being a teenager, and your parents wear jester outfits whenever you’re in public with them. On top of that it’s infuriating that our “leaders” are guilty not only of the most bonebrained dumbfuckery in being fished in like tuna for this scam, but are planning on stealing my money and embezzling plenty of it themselves to pay for the Olympics they’ll never get. Well, fuck them. Fuck them sideways.
As for the IOC, they’re too pathetic to fuck sideways. Just before they arrived Toronto tried to shuffle off all the homeless people downtown. After all, they’re just a bunch of freeloaders with no real jobs who take up a lot of space and drink a lot - the IOC members, that is. When you’re importing rich European freeloaders, the regular Canadian ones gotta move aside.
In summary:
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Fuck the Olympics. It’s fun to watch on TV but it’s a surefire money-loser if you hold it youself. We’d be out BILLIONS of dollars, would completely fuck up our city, and would be left with more white elephants than the All-Albino Animal Circus.
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Fuck every Canadian associated with the bid. I don’t know which is worse; the fact that they’re a bunch of pathetic, snivelling idiots taking it up the poop-pipe for a pack of Olympics thieves when they’re being scammed the entire time and are too fucking stupid to see it, or the fact that they’re greedy, underhanded weaselfuckers planning to bilk the public of billions so their personal businesses can get in on the action. So fuck them twice: Fuck you! Fuck you! And fuck you again for good measure!
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Fuck the Canadian Olympic Committee and the amateur associations who have been whining nonstop since the Sydney games and demanding more and more taxpayer money. The leaders of the COA have screwed up the funding they DO get in such a colossal and fuckwitted fashion that we now have Olympic athletes in Canada who campaign against our own Olympic association.
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Fuck the IOC. But who can blame them for taking us for a ride when we’re playing the fool so well? We may as well just take the rest of our bid money, put in it a big paper bag, and hand it over.
Thus ends my rant.