The "What Can You Do With a _____ Degree" Thread.

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

What Can You Do With An English Degree?

  1. Become a prescriptive grammarian.

  2. Pretend you’re a journalist.

  3. Talk about Chaucer a whole lot.

  4. WalMart greeter.

  5. Get into fistfights about comma usage.
    (and my favorite part about being an English major)

  6. When you don’t know the answer to a question, you can throw up your hands and say “Hey! I’m an English major!”

2

What Can You Do With An Engineering Degree?

  1. Look for a new job every six months.
  2. Singlehandedly keep the Pepto Bismol people in business.
  3. Chuck it all and open a fruit stand.
  4. Reminisce about being a productive member of society.
3

What can you do with a music degree?

  1. Spend many mornings of your life trying to convince interviewing panels that you do have other interests/ skills besides music and would make an excellent receptionist/ office junior/ waitress and aren’t actually an airy-fairy scatterbrain so wrapped up in your art that you can’t function normally in the ‘real’ world…

  2. Be a human encyclopaedia, able to answer any question about any composer or piece of classical music no matter how obscure. Surely after four years of study you must be able to identify this theme from the third movement of a flute sonata that I’m whistling to you now…

  3. Regularly attempt to play stuff you’d mastered at 18, bemoan your weak, wet-fish-like fingers, fantasise a little about playing for an enraptured audience of thousands, then go off and smoke a cigarette and watch some crap on TV.

  4. Help prevent spontaneous sing-alongs from falling apart by getting your mates back on track when they’ve lost the key

  5. Impress people at parties - see it is good for something.

4

Seriously, I’d like to know.

5

What can you do with a Liberal Arts degree?
Ask your customers if they’d like fries with their order. :smiley:

6

What can you do with a Library Degree?

  1. Wear glasses.
  2. Answer questions like “So, you like to read,” and “Do you know the Dewey Decimal System” and “You need a degree for that?” (Yes, yes, and apparently)
  3. Do your friends’ homework for them
  4. Be Pavlovianly compelled to Google until your fingers hurt
  5. Collect things like comic books, pulp novels, and pornography and call your job a cornerstone of civilization. ;j
7

[ul]
[li]Research[/li][li]Any job that requires mathematical literacy[/li][li]physics teacher[/li][li]merchant banking[/li][li]software engineer[/li][/ul]

Anything in fact.

8

What Can You Do With a Linguistics Degree?

  1. Pretend you know a bunch of languages.
  2. Write in phonetic transcription–a shorthand code that is 100% guaranteed to baffle everyone.
  3. Write a proper sentence.
  4. Know the origins of all the slang words in the world.
  5. Be one of the coolest people on earth, natch. :wink:
9

What can you do with a General Studies degree?

  1. Talk about a wide range of subjects, all of which you know a little about.

  2. Remind your parents that you did at least finish college.

  3. Brag about the number of minors you had.

  4. My job.

10

What can you do with a Masters Degree in Art Therapy?

Gee, I don’t know. The bottom fell out of the human services market about the time I graduated. As people who receive art therapy are often children or people who are chronically mentally ill, there does not seem to be a great clammoring for funding adjunctive therapy services like art therapy.

I did learn a lot about myself. I also use my skills to dodge emotional spatter (and occasionally shrapnel) at home and at work.

11

The misquote of the century

12
  1. Learn Klingon with minimum effort
  2. Smackdown the English majors who became prescriptive grammarians
  3. Intimidate absolutely everyone by diagramming a sentence a dozen different ways
  4. Bore absolutely everyone by doing it as a party trick
  5. Lie awake at night trying to divine the pronunciation rules of the symbol “g” in Old English, based on the first four lines of Beowulf, because you’re too lazy to look it up
13

What can you do with an MS in Economics?

  1. Hold two opposing opinions at the same time.
  2. Make investments that are as bad as everyone else’s.
  3. Pretend to understand what the hell Greenspan is saying.
  4. Work in marketing.
14

…or become a prescriptive grammarian yourself, except you do it right. :slight_smile:

15

:confused: Huh?

16

D’oh! Never mind. I get it. :smack:

17

What can you do with an English major (yep, another one)?

  1. Recognize Moby Dick in that horrible dragon movie with Matthew Maconaghy (sp?) and Christian Bale. Amaze your friend with the reference.

  2. Recognize the far superior Beowulf in Michael Crichton’s much poorer Eaters of the Dead. Annoy your friends with the reference.

  3. Read everything with a red pen in mind. Exasperate your friends by pointing out misplaced commas and apostrophes.

  4. Become the office expert on grammer and MS Word.

  5. Get a pretty good job as a technical writer.

  6. Get exasperated yourself with the endless “So whaddya going to do with that? Teach?” questions at your wedding.

18
  1. Teach high school or below.
  2. Join PeaceCorps, Americorps, etc.
  3. Accumulate even more student debt (grad school, law school, etc).

That’s the degree I graduate with. No one at my college has a major. The closest name that we (students) can come up with is a double major in math and linguistics, with a double minor in comparative literature and science.*

**this completely neglects the philosophy and music aspects of the program, but…yeah. I’m done.

19

What you can do with a technical theatre degree…

-Remain at the school’s theatre for six, seven, hell, maybe even eight years, with no progress outside that little world.

-Spend a lot of time looking down on the only creature lowlier than a theatre tech: Actors.

-Closing Night Parties. 'Nuff said.

20

What can you do with a degree in Cinematography/Film Studies in the Midwest.

  1. Work for minimum wage or slightly higher.

  2. Hear “COOOOL…pause…what can you do with that?” everytime you tell someone what you majored in.

  3. Get lots of “can you make my music video” requests.

  4. Rack up lots of debt.

  5. Analyze films until you aren’t invited out anymore.