Theonion.com Personal ads........Paying NOT to talk to someone, WTF?

[KarmaComa]

Andy’s tips to cruising the personals (half-serious):

*Originally posted by MrSarcasticus *
**It was just a few lines saying how I think you’re cute and that I’d like to know more about yourself.

You freakin’ amateur. First of all, you misuse the reflexive (ha ha ha). Second, only mention a photo as an auxiliary to another compliment. Jeez!

But, if truth be told, this theonion.com personals scene sucks ass. I bought 50 credits and used them all over the course of a few months. I actually managed to exchange emails with about 5. Briefly. Had two dates with ONE. Fizzled soon thereafter. This is especially distressing, since I used my ugly handicap. I only picked the ones who I thought were cute but not hot. Even there I failed. Oh, shame of shames. **

Well, it really depends on your demographic. First of all, seriously, choose based significantly on the profile (not the photo). Otherwise you may as well be in a bar. Be patient and stay casual. Of course, it’s a totally different game for a 23 year old than it is for someone a bit older. Also, be erudite, but not pretentious (tricky balance).

As a testimonial, I’ve met 7 people, was interested (in some form) in 6, am now friends with 3 (and getting it on with 1 other), and got it on at some point with 4 (and am in correspondence with 3 whom I haven’t met)… but then, I’m a hopeless slut.

OTOH, it might just be a bad scene for you.

NightRabbit, I hid my email address in random capitals in one of the fields, then mentioned being a 'capital’ist, but not a capitalist… works as a screening IQ test, too. Also popular is mentioning heat or hot with a hotmail username (non-English word) nearby. I’ve been busted many times, but now it seems I’m under the radar.

[Zsofia]

I gotta say, I do like the relatively small self-selected Spring Street personals group, but I’ve had more -success- with Yahoo, of the “picture of my fish and my truck” reputation. I do like the Spring Street payment plan, though, where you pay per contact versus per month.

Honestly the whole scene’s been worth it to me - dated a good many people, continue to hang out with a couple platonically, still going out with one. Way better average than I get in bars.