I’ve just been through all this, from what started as a routine mammo in August, through several follow-ups including the “harpoon” biopsy, to a lumpectomy last week. So far, it hasn’t been as awful as I was afraid it would be, but I would much rather not have to deal with this kind of thing at all.
Your wife has my sympathies; I know just what she’s going through. I hope it all turns out well for her.
When I met my wife, she was a B cup. Not large, but she did have defined breasts. After the two kids were finished borrowing them, they shrunk down to an A or so.
A question:
If I reassure her that if they need to remove one, at least she won’t be losing much, will I be able to move back out of the dog house sometime before retirement?
Just joking, of course, it sometimes helps with the worry.
Funny, I know that the odds are overwhelmingly good in our favor. Micro-calcification does not always equal cancer and if there is any cancer, catching it this early gives a really good prognosis, but this is where that reptilian part of the brain reaches out and wants to take over. Panic! Fight! Flight! Do something! And you can’t do anything, so you worry instead.
And, I know that it’s far too early to be worrying about anything, but it’s hard not to. Completely irrational. You jump from “we need to take another look” to “how am I going to raise my kids by myself?” Silly. Serious overreaction. Thank the gods that those thoughts only come and go.
The other, completely detached inner Spock is calculating the odds and just shrugs. No big deal. I’d say I spend 90% plus of my time in this mode.
My wife is handling it OK. She says she’s completely fine, but she’s worried a bit. I try to be as supportive as possible, and keep inappropriate jokes to myself.
It will be good to hear the news, either way.
It is really good to hear from others, pros, those who have had the same experience and everyone who is offering encouragement.
Thinking good thoughts for you and your family.
Good luck, TokyoBayer. I’m sure you know this, but I’ll say it anyway…Even if it is cancer, catching it early can make a huge difference.
My mother was diagnosed with breast cancer about 15 years ago. She had a double mastectomy and reconstruction. She’s still going strong today, and is over 70 years old.
My grandmother had a mastectomy at the age of 91, and lived to be 107!
Good luck, and don’t worry until you need to. My wife has calcium show up in hers routinely, and the doctor says it’s nothing.
Even if today’s test turns out badly, odds are great that she’ll be fine even without anything as hard-core as a mastectomy. My grandmother had a palpable lump in her breast, and her idiot doctor told her that since it was a painful lump it was definitely not cancer so it was fine to delay any testing till after her vacation. So, a month after she first called her doctor about this lump she finally had the biopsy, which came back as cancer. Even with a delay of a month between having a palpable mass and getting any treatment, they were able to do just a lumpectomy and follow up with radiation. She’s still sailing along like the Queen Mary eighteen years later.
Thank you.
I’m pretty sure that treatment in Taiwan is much more conservative than in the States.
She went in for the mammogram today and will go to see the doctor on Tuesday. I’ll update after we hear the news.
I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you both.
As I suspected from the doctor’s reaction, the diagnostic mammogram showed something he wants to look at closer. They’ve scheduled a mammotone biopsy(?) for next week. The doctor doesn’t like the shape of the things, so he’ll take them all out.
It looks something had gotten lost in the translation. My wife and I talk in Japanese, even though we’re both not native speakers. The doctor had been talking about a biopsy, not a mastectomy.
Back to waiting, I guess.
Good luck.
Good luck to TokyoWife, and good vibes to you both, TokyoBayer! I know this is a frightening situation and that it isn’t made less so by dealing with language issues, but I hope everything turns out okay.
This is following the same path I took three years ago, so far. I mentioned the mammotone biopsy in my post above. Holler if you would like more details.
Heads up: This will be kind of painful.
We got a copy of the report and It looks like they are recommending a nettle partial mastectomy after all. The bi-rad is 4b, which is an intermediate level. There are 8 to 10 of the micro-critters, and the doc doesn’t like the shape.
We’ve got a second opinion lined up tomorrow.
My wife is freaking out, worried about all the worst case things which could go wrong.
Sort of like when she was pregnant.
She’s calming down, though.
We’re all sending all the good wishes we can for you and your wife and family, Tokyo. Fingers, toes, and everything else crossed!
I’m not even going to tell you what I’ve got crossed.
TL:DR version:
2nd opinion is less pessimistic. We’re checking into options now.
She went in for the second opinion yesterday.
In February, she was told in Japan that they had something faint and it should be followed up on. It was assigned a BI-RAD of two, which is benign. Her first doctor here in Taiwan doesn’t like the change.
The second doctor she want to yesterday is a little more cautiously optimistic, or rather less pessimistic. He thinks a biopsy would be a good idea, but thinks it wouldn’t be the end of the world to wait another six months. He thought that the micro-calcification was too linear (ha!, I wondered if the shape had a significance), which is good, but the breast tissue is dense so that makes it less certain.
He also said that her breasts are too small for good nettle biopsies and recommends an incision. Now why is it that doctors can say things like that? If *I *told her that her breasts were too small, I’d be sleeping on the couch for months.
The problem with second opinions is that it makes things less clear. There is a highly regarded cancer center in Taipei and I think she should have it checked out there. It seems that there isn’t much of a downside to having a biopsy, and given her family history, it may be prudent. I think it may be possible that the doctors at the cancer center are more skilled in the various procedures, and getting the best is a good idea.
Even though I wasn’t there yesterday, I do like the second doctor much better than the first. He explained things to my wife rather than just dictate what to do. The first is a 1960s kind of guy.
The family history does concern us, but it’s nice that the second doctor isn’t quite a worried. He thinks that the doctor in Japan may have interpreted the x-rays a little more generously and gave a BR-RAD of 2, there the doctor he was more cautious and gave a 4b. That change in a little less than 10 months had concerned me, but his explanation makes sense.
Thank OG for the Internet. There is so much more and better information around.
She’s seeing how long it will take to get an appointment at the cancer center, then we’ll go from there.
Things seem much better than yesterday, even if the news is bad, it’s more understandable. I know a lot of people don’t want to hear the details, but I feel much better understanding what’s happening.
When we were dealing with Ian’s problems and then Shawn’s heart, it was so much more comforting to be able to go into the doctor’s office better prepared. I really like doctors who will work with us explaining what’s happening and also the uncertainty.
For some reason I can live much better knowing that somethings even doctors don’t know and can only make educated guesses at. When Ian was born and then died, it was less traumatic for me knowing that even the doctors wouldn’t know until he was actually born what the condition was. I can live with uncertainty, if I can understand what the uncertainty is, if that makes any sense at all.
How did that get in there? 
TL**: D**R The : and the D formed a smiley face.
I wish you and your wife the best. Thanks for the update.
Two years ago they also found something suspicious in mine and it turned out to be nothing after a second mammogram. Best of luck to her.