So I was doing some errands over my lunch hour, and I drove past a stipmall nearby (stipmall - a long building containing a number of shops, side by side. The sidewalk in front of them is outdoors, and usually under a roof or awning. Where I live, many grocery stores, pharmacies, etc are in stipmalls.)
Sandwiched between the healthfood restaurant and the liquor store is a place called “Coffins, Urns and More”. In the window was a sign “Ask us about affordable pet cremation urns.”
Since when can you get a healthy sandwich and window shop for a coffin, all in one stop?
You know, just yesterday I was picking up some eyeliner and realized I needed to make arrangements for my death. I was really looking forward to getting myself into that new DEADMAXX X-TREME 20000! coffin (with built in plasma tv, natch!), but there wasn’t a coffin store in sight!
They are becoming more popular - there has been a coffin store here for several years. If you are cost-conscious and have a place to store it until it’s needed, I think it’s a great idea. Funeral parlors charge huge markups on coffins.
I wish we had one of those in our mall. The closest Coffin Store (yes, that’s the name) is in Parma, on a main street. No one ever wants to drive to Parma, even though it’s not very far away. But when people ask me where they can buy things like that, I have no other option.
Someone brought in a cool cross necklace the other day…it held ashes. Remains you can wear!
Whoa, freaky. We were at Costco yesterday and saw that they sell caskets.
Mr. Rilch: “That is just so white trash.”
Me: “Not only that, but one of the functions of a funeral home is to be a calming force when people are in the midst of grief. Ever notice how mellow funeral directors are?..Well, you wouldn’t have; that’s the point. You would have noticed if they hadn’t been. I can’t imagine dealing with Costco when someone I cared for had just died.”
On the frontage road of IH35 in Austin sit three business right next to each other.
First (I may not get the order of them exactly right) is a XXX type message parlour, next is a skimpy lingerie store that advertises discounted prices for exotic dancers and finally there’s Affordable Coffins.
So if your man keels over of a heart attack after getting his massage, you can identify the body, buy new undies for the funeral and pick out his coffin in one shopping trip.
Still, the advantage of a coffin shop over, say, a clothing store is that you’re sure to find something that fits.
They offer Make Your Own Coffin courses locally. The creativity comes in when it comes time to store them - I’ve heard of people using them as coffee tables, book shelves and all kinds of wacky things.
Well, that beats my favourite strip plaza: until recently, near the gym where I work out, were the following (from left to right): Dentist. Picture-framing shop. Ukrainian consulate. Drivers and vehicles licensing office. Deli.
I figure it worked something like this:
Arrange your visa for your trip to Ukraine. Get your driver’s licence. Go to the dentist to get your teeth fixed, so you can impress the Ukrainians with your smile. Buy Ukrainian food for the trip. After you come back, have the pictures of your adventures in Ukraine framed.