Things I'm Certain Of But Cannot Prove

[puzzlegal]

At the risk of hijacking the thread a little longer:

I know several couples who went to marriage therapy and are still together. (That includes my marriage.)

My brother and his ex split, but they continued to go to their therapist as they worked through the divorce, and she helped them negotiate a split and a settlement they were both comfortable with. They found her immensely valuable.

[Cardigan]

@Spice_Weasel

There’s an underlying, unified reality that most of us are unaware of in our everyday lives. I’ve seen glimpses of it in meditation. It’s hard to explain, but in this worldview, the self drops away entirely. I guess I would say we are pure experiencing, we just don’t know it. This is the closest thing I have to a tenet of faith.

To anyone who has experienced the state of being you refer to, it’s not an article of faith or ‘belief’ in it any more than it is for someone who knows the sun rises in the east. Either one has seen it or they haven’t.

[Briny_Deep]

@Velocity

Never been to marriage counseling myself, but one thing I suspect but can’t prove: The vast majority of marriage counseling is either 1) akin to performing CPR on a dead person (way too late,) or 2) is meant to get the therapist to serve as a an ally to team up 2-vs-1 against the other spouse.

I have a wise friend who holds the view that most marriage counselors are extremely uninterested in preserving the marriage; they want each partner to maximize his or her individual self-fulfillment and often individual self-fulfillment RIGHT NOW, which can mean divorce, which is then seen as a win. And perhaps it is in some cases, but what’s missing from the therapist’s POV is the idea that in a marriage, each person has a moral obligation to the other.

[TokyoBayer]

@Velocity

One thing that I feel certain of, but cannot prove, is that, deep down, most people who follow a religion - or some political ideologies, or a certain politician - know that it’s full of holes, or isn’t true. They just won’t admit it out loud.

I’m an atheist not, but I grew up as a very conservative, ultra-believing Mormon surrounding by others and I strongly disagree with you.

I believed in a young Earth creationism, as does pretty much everyone I grew up with, and all my relatives. My uncle is a professor emeritus of engineering at a prestigious university and he believes the world is 7,000 years old.

Otherwise very intelligent people have the ability to compartmentalize their belief systems.

[Zyada]

So how much experience does your friend have with marital counselors?

[Briny_Deep]

Well, what he said was that most people he knew who’d been to one had broken up, and that was the reason he and his partner wouldn’t consider seeing one. So I guess some experience, but purely anecdotal.

[Czarcasm]

@Ulfreida

that there is a different kind of truth embodied by science and data and fact, atheists also know, on some level, that there is truth that is deeper and more profound than any science can approach. They often cannot admit it to themselves, but there is a part of them that knows this.

As an atheist I find this just a little disturbing. It is as if I stated that I believe that religionists deep down don’t actually think that something beyond science exists. Whether I believe or not, I sincerely believe that they believe for the most part and are not lying to themselves and others, either consciously or unconsciously.

[Zyada]

ISTM that he took a big leap to get from “all the people I know who went to marriage counselors still got divorced” to

@Briny_Deep

marriage counselors are extremely uninterested in preserving the marriage; they want each partner to maximize his or her individual self-fulfillment and often individual self-fulfillment RIGHT NOW,

What you described here would be a bad counselor. A good counselor knows that real change isn’t instant. A greedy one would milk the relationship for as long as possible.

[Briny_Deep]

Well, this is the thread for things I can’t prove, anyway. But I sincerely apologize if I offended.

[Shalmanese]

@Briny_Deep

Well, what he said was that most people he knew who’d been to one had broken up, and that was the reason he and his partner wouldn’t consider seeing one. So I guess some experience, but purely anecdotal.

“Most people I see walking out of the hospital have giant white casts around their arm that prevents it from moving and I really benefit from having a mobile arm, therefore, I refuse to ever step foot inside a hospital”.

[Beckdawrek]

People don’t walk out of hospitals. They rarely use old time white casts any more.
Can’t prove it but I think you don’t wanna go to the hospital for other reasons.

(I also believe you quoted some comedian, can’t prove that either)

[PookahMacPhellimey]

If men menstruated too, everyone would get time off work for cramps and other menstrual problems.

[Slithy_Tove]

Yeah, that great big brotherhood of man, where of course they’d cut each other the slack that they don’t cut women. Or not send other men down to die in the mines, or be blown to shreds by artillery by airbursts, or scoured off ships’ decks by green water over the bow.

[Beckdawrek]

If women didn’t have periods with cramps and PMS, we wouldn’t need men telling us it’s all in our minds, either.

Of course, I can’t prove it. Men being men and biology being biology.

[Czarcasm]

I truly believe that man wouldn’t use it as an excuse to get time off, but instead use it as an excuse to mistreat others- “The Red Defense”.

[Beckdawrek]

The best explanation I ever heard was if a man got kicked in his nuts 3 times an hour for 3 or 4 days, maybe he’d understand horrible menstrual cramps. Then he’d cry til he died.

Not everyone has them, or that bad. Enough women do.
The second day you don’t have the strength to exact misery on another. You just want it to end.

I’m always amazed what young woman can do. Every month, year by year.

[PookahMacPhellimey]

A reason. Not an excuse.

Disclaimer: I am from Europe and not working when you are not well is the norm.

[Q.Q.Switcheroo]

@Zyada

So how much experience does your friend have with marital counselors?

I’m reminded of the marriage counselor who boasted that he knew all about marriage, having been married four times.

[Ulfreida]

I am certain that many people are certain of things they have no experience with and never did any research on either.

[Stratocaster]

I think that can be conclusively proven.