Don’t spoof your ID to the USSR and use a trojan horse to steal all of Microsoft’s OS code. It’s crappy anyway and you are just wasting bandwidth.
If you are going ot listen to music BRING FUCKING HEADPHONES! The next person to do this is going to get blasted with one of the following:
Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On: Love Theme from Titanic.”
Prokofiev: the Montagues and the Capulets from Romeo and Juliet.
the 1812 Overture
Gordon Lightfoot
Russian Orthodox Funeral Music from Doctor Zhivago
It’s always the new freshman and the foreign exchange students who do this and get pissed when told the rules. Yes you are new. No, that doesn’t give you an excuse.
Don’t save stuff to the harddrive and get pissed when it’s deleted. That’s what discs are for.
Admins: is it too much to ask that the scanners actually fucking WORK?
Do not pull the holes off the fan-fold archive listings (by the hour) just to make them look tidy.
Do not ignore the order of things with an order. Reversing a pile of documents as you step through it is NOT keeping it in order.
Don’t sneeze on the keyboard.
The Sun computers in the back of the lab were made in 1990, and are too slow to go hacking.
Don’t try downloading a virus from one of the machines into the system. The administration will know who did it (or cover it up when it was one of them).
Helpy Fun Desk may stick to certain types of skin.
heh heres my rule
Learn to play counterstrike.
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Do not print your 10-page term paper and immediately close the document window without saving it and then blame me for having lost the printout because the print queue deleted your document for having waited too long
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Do not get pissed that you cannot use 2 or 3 computers at the same time to download crap. Guess what fucker, one person PER computer.
Do not let your friends use your account and get upset when your account is locked.
Do NOT ask to use my account and get pissed when I say no.
If you are a faculty member-do NOT have cyber sex and look at porn in the labs! (true story).
DO NOT enter the labs in the middle of midterm week with a bunch of friends, find your other friends, and start talking loudly about how drunk you were last night and how drunk youre gonna be tonight,and start chasing each other around the room cuz someone made a joke about you, and start sharing the terminal to check your hotmail accounts when there are a dozen people waiting in line to get a computer so they can print out their assignments and papers that are due in the next hour, and glare at people and insult them when they ask you to please be quiet, cant you see people are trying to work???
Do not sit down at an unused computer, start talking with your friend using the next computer, if you aren’t going to use the computer you’re sitting at.
The labs are crowded enough as it is, fuckface!
Go use the typing rooms in the library like everyone else! Someone’s probably already left a whole stack of L’Espressos in there for you.