Is this a joke? How are you supposed to eat bacon if you don’t use a fork?
Just lean over and pick it up with your mouth. Cut out the middlemen whether they’re forks, chopsticks or fingers.
In a vehicle provided by bread, lettuce, tomato and mayo.
Or with your fingers. Proper bacon is too crispy for a fork. Are we talking about the same kind of bacon?
I think you guys are thinking different bacons.
cactus waltz, you mean this kind of bacon, don’t you?
We are referring to bacon strips like these.
As Wile E explained, American bacon is usually too crisp to eat with a fork. Even if it’s not particularly crisp, it still eaten with one’s fingers. Boyfriend grew up eating the same sort that you’re probably familiar with, which is thick and tender enough to eat with a fork. You’d think after a few episodes of watching bacon shrapnel fly around the breakfast table he’d realize he’s not in dear old Blighty anymore, but noooooooooo. . .
Bolding mine. I could put up with most of the other things in this thread, but if my SO licked her plate, even in private, the relationship would be over.
My German family cooking vegetables until they are good and dead! And meat, too, but I thought green beans were supposed to be limp and grayish-green, surrounded by chunks of bacon fat, when I was growing up.
I have been meaning to say this about the wooden paddles for a long time. I love them. To me they symbolize summer and one of the really good things about my childhood: buying ice cream with whatever change I had managed to scrounge and then eating it with a wooden paddle. I wouldn’t let you take it from me. I do eat popsicles and then scrape my teeth along the wood to get the last bit. Sorry.
I also hate eating with my hands, and I’m Indian! Half our food is meant to be eaten with hands. I love ribs and stuff like that but I do wipe my hands after almost every bite. I hate having messy hands, and I would never eat bacon with my fingers.
Also,
I’ll take him. I like those sorts of eating habits. 
I like propriety at my mealtimes. But then, my SO is also very proper. Just not English.
ETA: schnuckiputzi, half the time I think so many American (nd othres, I only have experience with American) kids don’t like their veggies is they have only experienced dead veggies. I was appalled when I saw how my friends’ parents cooked them!
One of my friends hates her food to have any…well, taste, pretty much. When she cooks, she likes her chicken plain, her vegetables boiled, and her bread white and 65% air. Her spice cabinet has 1) salt 2) pepper (but not too much) 3) maple syrup (she is Canadian) and 4) ketchup. Just the thought of choking down a plain chicken breast, no marinade, no seasonings, no breading, no ANYTHING, that’s been baked in the oven, with ketchup on the side, and a slice of white Wonder bread with margarine on the side…euurgh. I can’t stand it. Thus, I don’t cook for her (because I like, you know, flavor) and she doesn’t cook for me. Dessert is the only thing we agree on.
Something that many more of my friends eat that I can’t stand is eating vegetables that have been drowned in cheese sauce, or butter sauce, or au gratin or what ever. Look, I really really like Brussels sprouts–if I’m going to eat them, I want to taste THEM, not the overwhelming butter sauce flavor. And similarly, I really like broccoli, and if I’m eating broccoli, I want to taste broccoli. Not cheese sauce. There’s a time and a place for melted cheese, and that is “nachos.” Please, not on any broccoli that I’m going to be eating.
I eat the parsley.
However, it serves a far more important purpose. It means that some thought, however minimal, was given to the appearance of the food. It means that whoever wrote up the standard was not cutting every single cost to the bone. “Look, if we eliminate the parsley on our breakfast dishes, we can save half a dollar on every hundred entrees!” Having a slice of orange or tomato is an even better sign.
I know how foie gras is made and I would try it if it was placed in front of me. I don’t your get reaction to a legitimate answer to the question. You aren’t a skinny Japanese guy are you?
Indeed.
However, I have to say that I’ve developed an extreme aversion to the phrase “comfort food”. Every food show on TV breaks that one out so often that it’s become even more meaningless than it was to begin with. I think it’s shorthand for saying, “I’m much too sophisticated to eat something this low-class, but I can justify it by enjoying it ironically.” People who use it make me want to punch them in the nose.
I just have to say
regarding hot dogs
how can you possibly be a food snob about what people put on a hot dog? really? are we talking about the same hot dog? or are yours made of prime rib? its like complaining that people eat top ramen with soy sauce or something.
Find a way to get behind some, then. Foie is freakin’ fabulous.
Sloppy food preparation will annoy me if it’s served pretentiously, whether it’s not-enough attention to detail, or just laziness. I’m ok with shortcuts for time and substitution decisions made on expense, but don’t try and tell me I should like Tang better than orange juice. Cheap food cooked right is better than expensive food made inedible by lack of attention.
My brother likes to ice a slice of bread with a half stick of butter, then masturbate his corn on the cob with it. Then, when he’s done with the corn, use the half-destroyed piece to Zamboni up the inevitable butter that dripped onto his plate, and eat it.
At least I think he still does this - for the past fifteen years or so I’ve usually left the room at this point.
Make sure you wash your hands before you do that if you’ve been handling wasabi…
…I just promised my girlfriend to never, ever again, even in jest, so much as comment on her insignificant, tiny, and completely benign food hangups. :eek:
I’d wager most American folk on here have rarely if ever even tasted real wasabi, given its price and rarity. And while certainly in your finer sushi restaurants the chef will slip a bit of wasabi under the fish on a piece of nigiri, most run-of-the-mill places seem to not bother doing so, leaving the wasabi as an exercise for the customer.
Back to the question, though, I can’t stand it when people squirt ketchup straight onto a bed of french fries, much less shudder over scrambled eggs. What the hell is that about?
People who try to eat pizza, fried chicken, or spare ribs with a knife and fork always feel kind of sad to me. Lighten up, Francis!
And oh! People who are excessively picky and don’t make any attempt to compromise with reality on the issue. We did Sunday brunch with my husband’s sister, who was very hungry and decided to order “an omelette, but make it very well cooked, like dry, please.” And then sent it back when it did not come out of the kitchen bone-dry, and eventually just left it on her plate untouched after it had been back in the pan twice. The way I see it, if you can’t stand a food when it is prepared in a common fashion, and have a history of your special request failing, then take the hint already and save it for home! Maybe try the pancakes instead?
Similarly, if I am hungry and delicate and know that accidentally ending up with a burger with mayo all over it would just make me burst into tears, maybe I should order something different and not take the chance.
Apart from truly gross things like chewing your food with your mouth open or making smacking noises, why should it matter to you how other people eat their food? If they want to put catsup on eggs, so what? If they want to eat ice cream with little wooden spoons, what’s it to you? They “over salt” their food and you have a conniption fit? Good grief!
Can I have the experience of watching people shove food into their mouths before I starve to death?
I’m man enough not to have to…:eek: