My sister’s ex was exactly like that.
Once we were in his kitchen and something spilled. He asked me to wipe it up with two paper towels. Not one. Not three. Two!
Somehow I had managed to fly from Tokyo all the way to Georgia but I needed help figuring out how many towels I’d need to absorb that particular amount of spilled milk.
( chuckling ) GF does this constantly! It’s usually the second half I miss, and when I ask her to repeat, I specifically use the last word of the part I understood so as to give her the appropriate place for her to begin. Of course she repeats everything, prompting me to blurt out “no no no, I heard that part” with as little hostility and impatience as I can muster.
I promise, it won’t make a bit of difference.
We have been a couple for 53 years and have worked the annoyances out. The few that are left are small and not worth fretting about.
I think most of the annoyances mentioned here are small and not worth fretting about, the idea is to share and laugh about them.
“What’s that?”
I know he heard me, I’m in close proximity speaking clearly to him.
I wait, lock eyes on him, raise my brows, and then he answers my question. He heard it, he just needed it to soak in first?
I do this, and yes, exactly, the question is in the buffer but hasn’t yet been processed, so I ask “what?” but if you wait a bit the question reaches the CPU and I can answer it.
I do not do it on purpose I swear, it’s just the way my mind works.
I call that “replaying the tape”.
i.e. I heard and comprehended most of it the first time. If there’s a gap in the convo I can mentally re-hear and re-process what was said and understand it fully the second time. If the other person keeps on blathering I’m forced to choose between replay or listening to the now current sentence. Can’t do both, and both the capacity and the half-life of the “tape” is only a few seconds. So my usual response isn’t “what”, but “hold on”.
As I’ve gotten older and my hearing has deteriorated, I find that I can still replay the tape, but it’s now often unintelligible. The sounds I recorded were just as muffled and jumbled as I perceived in real time. So no second chance for me any more. Or at least not very often.
Uggh!
A long, long time ago, I was eating an apple, and my husband said to me, “Don’t forget to take the sticker off your apple.”
That immediately became a running joke whenever he tries to micromanage me.
And yes, I did actually forget once. But he’ll never know.
I used to pride myself on my ability to eat all the components of the apple, the skin, the pith, the core, the seeds, even the peduncle and yes, the sticker. (an skill I developed when my parents tried to stop me from eating ALL the apples in the fridge and I needed to get rid of the evidence of my thefts).
That’s obscene. My husband eats bell peppers like apples, which is equally wrong.
I knew a guy in USAF who ate oranges that way. WTF, dude! That’s just wrong!
Didn’t peel them, just took a big bite out of the side as you would an apple, then kept going until the whole thing was gone.
He probably ate the stickers too, but I can’t vouch for that. 
I don’t do it anymore, (not needed now that I buy my own apples). Now I throw the peduncle and the sticker in the trash.
You’ll all be glad to know that the stickers on fruit are mandated to be edible. For obvious reasons
FTR: In the US, all fruit labels are food-grade.
It was likely the case in Argentina in the 80’s and 90’s or I would be long dead by now.
You can bet I informed Spouse Weasel of that immediately.
If my wife goes to bed before me, she sometimes leaves her detritus on my side of the bed. I often have to relocate her phone and Kindle. Sometimes hair clips. At least once I found her laptop. If it’s dark and I’m keeping the lights out it can be a whole discovery journey where I keep finding more things as I nestle into bed.
She also wears socks to bed and then takes them off in the middle of the night. I once found six pairs of socks under the sheets.
I used to do this and they were on the floor as well. I’d justify it as tending my “sock garden.”
Since I started taking stimulants for ADHD I don’t do that any more.
That’s funny. I’ve never looked at a sticker and had a conscious that that it must be taken off, let alone tell an adult that.
My wife does that a lot, although not to the same degree. She’ll remind me to take things when we go somewhere.
But I tend to forget things as well, so maybe she’s got a point.