Thinking Out Loud™

Thinking Out Loud: Why do they put babies on toilet paper packaging? You never see a baby wiping their ass.

What are you Thinking Out Loud™?

I’m expressing surprise that special characters are now allowed in titles.

I am thinking the ™ character is special… but not really all that special.

Excuse me while I whip this out: ®

The TP is soft as a baby’s bottom? And will keep your bottom unmangled like theirs?

I’m thinking anyone who thinks of a baby’s bottom as unmangled hasn’t seen a good diaper rash recently. :wink:

Unmangled? Who has a bottom that’s mangled? :dubious:

Mangled Bottom … BAND NAME.

Oh no, I get it… it’s just, can’t we come up with a better marketing metaphor than a creepy, angelic baby on every damn TP package? What a nice thing to associate with wiping my ass. If you have to relate ‘soft’, why not clouds, or cotton, or a bunny? Although, If I saw some TP with chainsaws, barbed wire and fire on it, I’d totally buy that out of respect.

And, yeh… WhyNot’s on to something. Baby crap is something special. Maybe it’s their lack of fiber, I don’t know, but when I changed my own kids diapers, I went through 14 wet wipes every time.

I’m pretty sure it’s because it’s socially acceptable to show naked baby butts. Same reason the other brand has those creepy bears.

OMG…those bears are so creepy. We buy the brand with the golden retriever puppy on it. No idea what brand it is, but I like puppies, so I buy the brand with puppies…it’s as good a reason as any to pick one tp over another.

Those bears are freaks. I don’t buy the bears.

Maybe I would like to wipe my ass with a puppy. So long as it’s white, so you can tell when you’re done. Maybe a Bichon Frise, or a Toy Poodle, or something. I’m thinking you gotta go French.

Why do the makers of chewing gum think that advertising their gum as being good enough that people will send attack rams in to butt us in the stomach and make us spit the gum out so they can pick up our half-chewed gum and race away in their van makes us want to buy their gum? This makes less sense than the jeans ads that made us think their pants were so good that our psycho ex-SOs would hunt us down so they could steal them and wear them themselves.

Someone who used that tan sandpaper toilet paper from hell in a public bathroom. Or Scott tissue.

I haven’t seen the gum one, but it sounds lame. And the Levi’s one was lame too. Is clever marketing really that hard.

I’m usually a sucker for self-depreciating/creepy marketing. I admit to loving the Skittles™, Burger King™, and Altoids™ stuff.

I think that Snuggle Bear would make a good ass wiper.

Oh, hell yeh! Can I get a package of 50?

Now I really wanna wipe my ass on that bear. WTF?

Ahh, THIS is what I was looking for.

I like that one, if only for the incongruity of a ram in the city. Their gum is so long-lasting they are going out of business, so they are trying to get you to spit it out and take a new piece.