This Girl I like, The PAIN that I feel

Factual Questions
1

Sorry if this offends anyone-Their is this Goddess of a Woman, a year younger than me, I’ll call her “Pam” who works near where I work, a couple of years ago, I introduced myself to her and things worked out great, I got her cell phone number, but at that time I had OCD(Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder) which soon RUINED everything.
“Pam” thinks I’m a loser and wants nothing to due with me, anyway, every time I see her it’s like a DAGGER in my heart. Wondering what could have been if it wasn’t for my OCD. It’s not fair.
Anyway I think I got this OCD from my Mother’s side of the family, and I do blame my mother for it.
It’s been over 5 years, and still every time I see her it’s like a DAGGER in my Heart.

My ONLY hope is that someway/somehow on the “Other side” Afterlife, I could perhaps have a 2nd chance with “Pam” and who knows be intimate with her, that is my ONLY hope, and part of me lacks Faith in God. I am a Christian, and the Bible says “With God all things are possible” I want her to see the REAL me, whatever that is. The Perfectly “Normal” me that would exist in the Afterlife.
The website Near-Death.com shows that Universalism is True, and that all the hobbies of Earthly life exist in Heaven. Including Sex,
I ask myself , does God feel my pain regarding “Pam”
And I tell my Mother, since I got OCD from her side of the family, that in Heaven to Just Talk to God or some Spirit Being, and make it possible for me to be with “Pam”
I tell my Mom, “I don’t care how,just make it happen, and that she had better make it possible”
I mean so many other Girls I couldn’t have because of my OCD in the past, but this one girl “Pam” it upsets me, I still haven’t gotten over it.
Not to be offensive, but if I couldn’t get “Pam” in the Afterlife, in the intimate sense , I wonder if God would create like a “Clone” of “Pam” that would look and feel, and sound exactly like her, if I was intimate with her. Like a Solid-Hologram that would feel 100 human and natural.
I long to be with “Pam” if not in this life, then maybe the Afterlife.
Or at least I could be friends with Pam, and she would realize it’s just my OCD that made me Screw up.

I wonder if God could show me an alternate reality where I didn’t have OCD, and where “Pam” and I were together.
Does anyone else here share my Afterlife hope, that I share with “Pam”
I continue to tell my mother to Pray and Hope that someway/somehow “Pam” and I could be together on the “Otherside”

2

I would strongly encourage you to discuss your feelings with a mental health professional. I do not mean this as an insult or to dismiss what you say, I genuinely feel that would be best for you and the other people in your life.

Best of luck

3

Believe me, I plan to,
I hope my suffering shall not be in silence.

4

woah…this belongs in adifferent forum…perhaps MPSIMS…some advice: let her go, no girl should feel like a dagger…find some other fish in the sea.

5

But I don’t want some other girl , I want “Pam”

6

This is in the wrong forum and everything; not to mention that your state of agitation makes it unlilkely that this would prove a productive thread anyway, but.

The quoted section of your post above makes me wonder if you see Pam as an individual with her own life, hopes, desires etc. Or just as an object that isn’t performing its designated role of satisfying you. I know you’re talking about a ‘copy’ of her, not the real thing, but I wonder if you see (and treat) her the same way.

Sorry if that sounds harsh.

7

Dude,

Get over it and move out of your Mom’s basement. If you keep going like this you’ll be slapped with a nice restraining order.

8

If I couldn’t have “Pam” in the intimate sense, then a “Clone” or Solid Hologram of her would be the next best thing.
I don’t just view her as some sex object, I would like to have a relationship with her, I wonder what type of person she is.
Who knows, maybe every time she see’s me, although she wants nothing to do with me, she wonders what might have been if I were perfecty “Normal” if it wasn’t for my OCD.

9

Many Guys like Britney Spears, and would like to be intimate with her.
But if they couldn’t get Britney, the next best thing would be a Solid-Hologram (like the Holodeck on Star Trek:TNG) of Britney, it would feel exactly like human flesh.
Sorry if this seems offensive. I am NOT a bad person or a stalker or anything. I just hope to be with “Pam” on the other side.
I wonder, if I collapsed and died in Front of “Pam” would she feel any sadness over me being dead.

10

This is my concern, because in a sense, this is like saying “If I can’t have you by your own consent, I’m prepared to have you without it.”

11

If you love something, set it free, if it comes back it was meant to be.

Clichéd I know, but if “Pam” is not for you, she’s just not for you. But you’ll find someone in the future you’ll love just as much and who’ll love you aswell.

Hang in there man.

12

I am hanging in their, and I hope to be with “Pam” in the Afterlife, that’s my ONLY hope.

13

Grape Kool-Aid?

14

If you are serious, I BEG you to seek help from a mental health provider. You seem to be suffering from another aspect of your admitted OCD. I fear that you may be well on your way to legal trouble. I am not trying to insult you, I am genuinely concerned. For “PAM” as well as you.

15

Not so nice, Ilsa. I think this kid needs some help and guidance-- beyond what this message board can offer.

16

I suspect something else, something of which speaking is verboten.

17

I, too, urge you will all my will to consult a doctor immediately. Today. No delay whatsoever.

The strong feelings you describe seem a long way from a normal crush on someone or even the laments of the lovelorn. What you described is not healthy, and I am sure that you can be helped to get past these intense and terrible feelings.

I send you all my best wishes that things work out well for you, but please call a doctor right now and explain your situation. It can help you enormously.

18

You could have put it a bit more tactfully, Ilsa, but I think you may have a point. I am getting definite overtones of “my life is over” from this guy’s post.

GarfieldFan, if you are not doing something “verboten,” then I really think you should call a psychiatrist or a helpline. These people are very friendly and understanding and they will do what they can to help you. I think you know that this obsession you have with Pam is unhealthy and is a product of your OCD, and I want you to get help with that.

Please call them.

19

Seems to me that you pretty obviously are not going to ever get ‘Pam’.

You need to seek counseling to help you get over her. She is NOT as great as you have made her out to be.

Hopefully the mods will come in and either move this or close it as you are oversharing with your first post and it is in the wrong forum.

Best of luck to you.

20

GarfieldFan:
Since you said that she thinks you’re “a loser and wants nothing to do with me” it is extremely unlikely that she’ll become romantically attracted to you. The odds of you having a long term relationship with her within your lifetime are probably a trillion to one or less. i.e. practically impossible.
If you continue to be so obsessed about Pam it is near-certain that your feelings won’t be returned. So you’d spend your life feeling frustrated and possibly be annoying her and possibly getting a restraining order. The alternative is to stop being obsessed about her. You should take a more easy going approach to dating - and only consider making the relationship really deep and committed (i.e. being “in love” with her) after you’ve been dating for 3 months. (Well that advice could be questionable)
As far as heaven goes, no-one knows for sure.