Now you may ask, “Jack, why would you ask such a stupid question?”
I have my reasons.
Want to hear them? Ok.
There is this woman in my neighborhood who recently got her first dog. Now she thinks she is the authority on all matters canine related - but that’s a different rant. Anyway, I ran into her the other day, and struck up a conversation, in which she informed me that her dog was at the vetrinary hospital having it’s knees replaced.
My first response, spoken to myself was, “Knees? Dogs have knees?”
So I figure one of three possibilities are true …
1 - The vet saw her coming. “I’m afraid to tell you ma’am but your dog’s, um, uh, knees, yeah that’s it, his knees need to be um, uh, replaced. Yes his knees need to be replaced. And I need a new DVD player so three/four hundred dollars ought to cover it.”
2 - This woman is suffering from some sort of strange condition - Canine Munchausen by Proxy Syndrome, in which dog owners subject their pets to unnecessary medical procedures to garner attention for themselves. In which case she needs more help than that yippy little rat she calls a dog.
or
3 - Dogs actually have knees, which on occasion need to be replaced.
I just fondled my dog’s legs. Okay, maybe it’s because I’m a human and she’s not, but they don’t feel like knees to me. I guess I’m wondering how one might go about replacing them.
Think about this,though - if what you say is true, what if you had conjoin twin schnauzers, attached at the hip, might you be able to say that this animal is a dog with four knees? Or would it be an elephant?
We had this question in Trivial Pursuit the other night, and this was what the card gave as the correct answer. FWIW, since they aren’t always accurate.
Okay, I guess I can call off the social workers from the canine division. I have been enlightened. Dogs have knees, as appearantly do all four legged vertabrates, birds, insects, and even willing to believe most fish at this point.
I think I’ll tell her if she’ll give me 50 bucks, I’ll change the batteries in her hamster.
That is unless Michi can come through and tell me that, yes, in fact, dogs do, on occasion, find themselves in the situation, wherein, the above mention knees, need to be replaced.
The knee of a dog is located really close to its body, with an extremely short forearm. The ankle is the main joint in what we call its leg. I’ve never heard of a dog getting its knees replaced, but for large breeds that suffer from hip dysplasia, hip replacements are occasionally given to champions so they can continue to breed.(Which always seemed like they are breeding bad traits in, which is one of the reasons I will never get another purebred.)
If quadrupeds (except elephants) have got knees only on the hind legs, may I assume that what they’ve got in their front legs is elbows?
Note: To you it may look like dogs’ and cats’ knees bend backwards. Not so; the joint bending backwards is actually their ankle. Their paws are actually their toes, and their foreleg is actually the arch of their foot.
Really weak pictogrammic depiction:
Human:
|
P )
/
/
K
\
\
_M__A
Cat (since that is what I have near me at the moment):
\
----P--/
K--/
\__A
/
_M/
Note:
P: pelvis, K: knee, A: ankle, M: metatarsophalangeal joints (also known as the ball of the foot).
Carnivorous mammals (like dogs and cats) are what are called digitigrade, meaning they walk on their toes. Humans are plantigrade, meaning they walk on the soles of their feet. Hoofed mammals are unguligrade, because they walk on their hoofs (equivalent to their toenails).
Birds are basically built the same as cats, except one or more of their toes usually bend backwards (check out your local parakeet).