I agree 100%. That was a brilliant summary. Watch the crazy, disfunctional brother’s on the lam part and skip the vampire part. It was funny to watch Harvey Keitel being a minister, or whatever, though. [to whoever asked if Clooney has ever made a good movie: Out of Sight co-starring Jennifer Lopez is a fine piece of entertainment.]
I’m going to get blasted for this for sure, but I have to sheepishly admit that I’ve never been able to make it to the end of Casablanca, Maltese Falcon, or The African Queen. I guess there’s just something about Bogart that bores me to tears.
And put me in the “loves Basketball” camp. (Maybe we should form some sort of support group?)
“Satan – I’ve had enough of your two cents!” – The hilarious Federalist
I can’t believe no one has mentioned this yet, THE POWER RANGERS MOVIE. I have a pretty high tolerance for really bad movies, but this one was HORRIBLE! A GF of mine convinced me to take her little cousins to the movies to see this. So we all go, and it is so bad her and i take turns sitting there with the kids while the other goes and sits in the lobby. Yuck.
“Through twilight, darkness and moonrise
My scarlet tears will run
As stolen blood and whispered love
Of fantasies undone”
I’ve watched a lot of bad movies all the way through (January Man) because I can’t stand to not know how something ends. But this just stank. Ellen does a poor pitiful dateless me schtick, then meets a man that is obviously too good to be true. Bill Pullman was dreadfully miscast at the pristine perfect (soon to be revealed as con) man who does a 180 once he has her hooked. I turned it off as soon as he did the 180 bit - he couldn’t pull it off if there was a gun pointed at his head.
I do not merely dance. I bewitch. I seduce. I enchant and I bewilder. Throw money.
(Gee, Wally must have seen me dance!)
I’ve never walked out of a movie in a theatre (I’m not counting movies I’ve started watching at home and switched off since there are many reasons for doing so besides the wretchedness of the movie). I have put myself to sleep in several theatres as a quiet protest against the movies.
Quest for Fire.
Aliens.
And perhaps the steamiest pile of crap ever, Dracula: Dead and Loving It!
The only movie I have walked out on was some forgettable waste called “Staying Together,” with Daphne Zuniga. It was out about 10 years ago.
There have been several I wished I walked out on, though. I tend to just sit and suffer. Movies I wished I walked out on: “Vibes” with Cyndi Lauper, “Cruel Intentions” (although it was worth the “Wrong! Bad! Bad! Wrong!” line–so hokey, so funny), “Godzilla,” “Mr. Wrong.” Oh, man, I want my money back. With interest!
The only movie I’ve actually walked out of was Eight Millimeter. I can normally deal with quite a lot of violence, but this made me sick. I walked out 30 minutes early after I realized it was never going to end.
Second worst (and definetly the worst film experience) was The Waterboy. My new boyfriend had talked me into seeing it even though I hate Adam Sandler movies. He loved it. He laughed hysterically at every joke and each time he did it, my respect for him went down a few notches until the pathetic end when I realized what an idiot he was. Later that night I broke up with him.
Ed (that baseball playin’ monkey movie)
These were so vile, so godawful, that I could not sit through them, either at home or in the theater. My poor traumatized child agrees with me. As for adult movies:
Interiors (Woody Allen. “drama”.)
Armageddon
Pulp Fiction (I know, I’m sorry, I just can’t see the attraction)
I walked on all of the above, waited out in the lobby till the end.
Let me also add to the list:
anything with Chris Farley, if I wanted to
watch fat stupid guys fall over furniture…
any movie with boxing and closeups of
ugly sweaty guys beating each other up.
Show me anything featuring the above and my svelte dimpled buttcheeks are headed for the exit at a fast clip.
OK, help me out here guys. Sometime during the 1980’s there was a really stupid movie about skiing. I think it was about a bunch of people on a ski team or ski patrol or something.
The only thing I remember about it is that about five minutes in there was a scene in which some characters were skiing down a slope that looked like it was sloping down on about a 60 degree angle. That is, until you looked at the sky in the background, which was sloping down at about a 55 degree angle.
At that point, it was more than enough for us, and out we went.
You don’t have a thing to worry about. I’ll have the jury eating out of my hand. Meanwhile, try to escape.
Sig by Wally M7, master signature architect to the SDMB
The Color Purple is my “hated it so much it still makes me angry thinking of it” movie. I resent everyone who had anything to do with it. Geeze, I hate that movie!
More recently, I think The Negotiator annoyed me particularly, though I didn’t walk out. First, my parents are movie buffs and I wasn’t raised that way, and second, when it stars Samuel Jackson and Kevin Spacey, it’s hard to believe that it really sucks that bad. But along about the time that the hostile, neurotic hostage-taking freak we are supposed to see as a hero decides to create a diversion by blowing up the only computer that contains evidence that can vindicate him – well, things didn’t get any better after that.
Catrandom
Go to a vet that’s also a taxidermist. Either way, you’ll get your cat back. Sig courtesy of the amazing WallyM7
It is interesting to see how many different points of view we Dopers have. For instance I am amazed at how many films I consider great that are listed in this thread : Resevoir Dogs I know , its spelled wrong - screw it . . . I thought was an amazing film with a great cast Fargo For real ?? How can you not like a movie with such fantastic acting and such an interesting plot, or for that matter a film where the heroine is a pregnant cop ? Blair Witch Project People seem to either love this movie or hate it. I for one thought it took a lot of chances, and yes I will admit parts of it were tedious - I will also admit parts of it scared the hell out of me. Pulp Fiction Very well written.
But I digress . . .
I had to walk out of : Thin Red LineThis got nominated for Movie of the Year ?? What was the Academy smoking ? BTW, what the hell was the freakin point of this movie ?? Hello !! Can I get a plot here please ? I left after an hour still wondering when the movie was going to start. The Big Hit This movie was so preposterously stupid that I asked for my money back. You would think they would teach in film making 101 that the audience needs to like at least one character for us to care. The director should have added an “S” to the beginning of the last word in the title. Payback I spent the entire movie wondering why the hell I should care about Mel Gibson’s character. By the end I was truly hoping someone would kill the bastard. The line from the preview was “prepare to root for the bad guy”. I was. I was rooting for anyone to disembowel him.
I have a high tolerance for even the worst movies. I usually don’t risk paying for something awful and I don’t make it to the theatre much any more (since becoming a dad) so I am very careful about what I go see. I’ll rent just about anything though just to see if it’s alright.
BTW, I watched The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover twice in one weekend in college (it was playing at the school theatre). Peter Greenaway is great.
Anyway, Lost in Space sucked out loud. What were William Hurt and Gary Oldman thinking? I should have walked out, but kept wishing for it to get better.
I didn’t see a lot of these films like Anaconda, Krippendorf’s Tribe , or Lake Placid. You people should just know better than to tempt fate like that.
The one that I regret not turning off was She’s so Lovely. What the fuck was that about. I was especially let down by Penn and Wright. Maybe I’m dense, but I just didn’t get it at all. I watched the whole thing thinking I would eventually become enlightened. I was just left shaking my head, thinking I could have been asleep instead of watching this until 1 in the morning.
A lot of these movies I haven’t seen but a bunch I really liked have been listed. Well a couple. Titanic yes I know it sank and all that I like to watch it for the cheering factor when Rose spits in her ex-fiances face. Maverick? I loved that movie! Krippendorf’s Tribe it was funny I knew it wasn’t going to be a masterpiece and I enjoyed it. I don’t often hate movie but some I just can’t get into. For some reason Enemy of the State didn’t hit it with me and I’m a Will Smith Fan. (recent years though he did look kinda cute in Fresh Prince) I can’t think of any others that I really hated but then I don’t go to movies too much.
Oh wait Scream 3 I sat through it going huh? the whole time. It was really dumb. I don’t think I’m ever going to rent 2 and watch it.
Life is an exotic and sonorous nightmare, in which reason does not always play a role… - Exerpted from V:tM
Dreams die hard and we hold them in our hands long after they have turned to dust. - Bowen in Dragonheart
Human beings can always be relied upon to assert, with vigor, their god-given right to be stupid. - Seize the Night by Dean Koontz
You know why people call something impossible? Because it hasn't happened yet. - Robin Williams in What Dreams May Come
Yeah, I posted that in the other thread. But this movie was so bad that it made me angry. I want my three hours back! One thing that really ticked me off was that the director thought he was being so clever. Hey! I “twist” not a twist if everyone can see it coming!!! Stink-O-rama.
“I must leave this planet, if only for an hour.” – Antoine de St. Exupéry
Magnolia was a great 2 1/2 hour movie. Unfortunately, it lasted 3 1/2. You could have cut 45 minutes from the movie just by trimming scenes that went on too damn long. (I disagree with Roger Ebert on this point.)
I thought of another one I should have bolted from, but didn’t–An Awfully Big Adventure with Hugh Grant and Alan Rickman. A girl in my dorm was a big fan of Hugh, and dragged a whole row’s worth of us to see this piece of claptrap. The pivotal line comes not long after the previously virginal young lady starts doffing Rickman (who turns out to be her father) and says (imagine Irish accent) “Ya know, I’m gettin’ used to fuckin’. It’s kinda like playin’ the ukelele. After a while you get the hang of it.”
The only redeeming thing about the whole movie was that it centered around a production of Peter Pan, in which Alan Rickman was playing Captain Hook.
Dr. J
“Seriously, baby, I can prescribe anything I want!” -Dr. Nick Riviera
How can anyone walk out on a movie? Any movie? My rule, which I’ve never broken, is to watch every movie from start to finish. I’m talking about the end credits finished.
Every movie, even really horrible ones, like Porky’s,Police Academy 6,Surf Ninjas,Cabin Boy and Superman IV deserve a chance to be watched to the very end.
I believe the movie you’re talking about is aptly named - “Ski Patrol”. Ah yes, I yearn to return to the days of sexist and exploitive comedies. Wait, what am I thinking…
In any case, back the OP. Night at the Roxbury. Rented it, so I couldn’t walk out but I shut it off after about 25 minutes and those a 25 minutes of my life I just can’t get back.