I just got an email that reads, in it’s entirety,
It’s (supposedly ) from “Fedex Express Courier” <bpal@triad.twcbc.com>
Geez, you losers, at least make some effort…
You think that’s bad, you should see some of the losers showcased on 419eater. Off the top of my head, there was the guy who claimed to be abducted and probed by Martians, several voodoo salesmen, gals with prostate cancer, and guys with uterine cancer, and of course, legions of FBI spokesmen, FedEx people, and major banks with Yahoo email addresses.
I got something similar:
What’s neat is that it made it past Gmail’s usually top-notch spam filters.
Oh man. Does this mean I haven’t won 1,200,000.00 USD?
I got it by mistake. Could you tell me where to send the processing fees?
Don’t worry about it-just send the processing fees to me, and I’ll take care of all the paperwork for you.
Anything for a friend.
Great, thanks. I’m dyslexic and sometimes switch numbers around. Could you send the difference back to me ,please?
No prob, bud.
Would you like that in cashier’s checks or travelers checks?
Wire transfer. I have hEre aLetter of Vouching from Man of ExtreMe Honesty to say to you I am man of Truth when It comes to Money Dealing with. Send of Me youR banKing details and I will handle rest with much Just.
I’d rather you didn’t take such a risk-someone might use a fake I.D. to pick it up. If you give me your full name, social security number and bank routing number, I’ll put it directly into your account.
My name is Todd Davis
My social security number is 457-55-5462
Bank Routing number 180-05433-562
You guys are so cynical. I’ll have you know that I received the same email and sent in the information requested and I actually got a legitimate check for a million pounds which I was able to cash and spend.
Of course, I blew the whole million on some bogus penis enlargement pills I got another email for a week later. So I’m right back where I started.
Except with a million Pounds worth of new penis…right? …uhhh…right?
Yesterday, I had an older gentleman come into my office with a letter saying he’d won $1.4 million, asking if it was legitimate. No, sorry, it’s not, I said, and here are a few clues to spot such things in the future: first, no legitimate contest or sweepstakes will require you to send in a $20 check before they give you your winnings. Second, a legitimate sweepstakes would most likely contact you by special courier rather than regular US Mail. And finally, even before you open the envelope, look at the postmark: if it says “presorted”, that means that thousands of people got a letter exactly like this one.
This was not the first elderly person who has brought in such a letter. They always look different, and they’re always frauds.
And then there was the letter I got from Barack Obama’s banker this past summer:
I had been looking for cars online recently and asked one AutoTrader.com seller a simple question - does the car he was selling have heated seats? (it is a must have for me). This particular car was priced much lower than similar cars; that should have been my first clue. But no harm in asking a question about the seats, right?
A few days later I get a long email about how he wasn’t selling the car because he needed the money, oh no, he was honorably going to donate all the money to some unnamed children’s foundation. He also volunteered to pay all shipping costs to get the car to me! Of course, he needed all my details so an “eBay company” could contact me to ship the car to me (Huh? This was an Autotrader ad, not eBay). Also, he was out of town “in a business trip” so he couldn’t show the car to me.
He totally ignored my heated seats question. What an idiot, and I told him as much in my return email. These scammers don’t even try! If he’d simply emailed back that yes, it does have heated seats I might have fallen for it. (No, I wouldn’t have, but the email I did get back was so stupid).
Amateurs.
I was checking mail for the address I use for online orders, and to fetch spam when I came across this little jewel (and this is after their crazy bit about FedEx sending me money… for some reason):
Furthermore, you might be asking yourself how come this email, cheque or draft. Anyway, your cheque was brought to the processing delivery office by the National Lottery Fiduciary Agent/Claim, signifying that you are a rightful winner to their Lottery Award selected randomly from three thousand (3000) lucky email addresses which your email address is among the lucky email addresses.
That doesn’t even make any sense.
FedEx Courier Service Company is mailing you as per your parcel that was brought to our subsidiary courier company “World-Tropic Courier Services” to be delivered to you.
What?
*You are to make the payment of the Ј150 (One Hundred & Fifty British Pounds) to the details below through Western Union or Money Gram. *
Wait, why am I sending money to the UK again to get a package from FedEx? Do they want me to pay shipping fees in advance? Why not just deduct shipping costs from whatever money they’re talking about sending me? This just seems like bad customer service.