it’s “don’t trust NO backwoods southern lawyer”
ain’t yoo nevah bin to the south?
This turkey said hello to my li’l fren
This turkey died from drinking too much water in a hold your Wee for a Wii radio contest.
This turkey died from an IED in Iraq.
This turkey died when his mother heard the voice of God who told her to drown him in a bathtub.
This turkey died playing too much World of Warcraft in a Chinese labor farm.
This turkey died of avian flu.
This turkey died from Severe Combined Immune Deficiency Syndrome after living for 12 months in a plastic bubble.
This turkey died by being tasered by a trigger-happy officer who didn’t know it was wearing a pacemaker.
That’s right, it’s The Turkinator.
This turkey tried taking a canoe trip down the Cahulawassee.
This turkey was hit on the head by a plummeting tortoise that was dropped by an eagle.
The tortoise was unharmed (though rather surprised).
This turkey was east bound and down but failed to make it into the safety of the rockin’ chair.
Eleanor Rigby keeps this turkey’s face in a jar by the door.
This turkey was trapped in time, surrounded by evil, and ran out of gas.
Tom Turkey, gobbler. A bird barely alive. “Gentlemen, we can rebuild it. We have the technology. We have the capability to make the world’s first bionic fowl. Tom Turkey will be that fowl. Better than it was before. Juicier…meatier…tastier.”
All this and more -
news at eleven.
And now back to Judge Judy. This turkey is suing that turkey for using fowl language.
But you have to admit, it was poultry in motion.
This turkey gave Marsellus Wallace’s wife a foot massage. I ain’t saying it’s right for Marsellus to throw this turkey into a four hundred degree motherfucking oven but this turkey should have fucking known better.
This turkey went hunting with Dick Chaney. 'Nuff said.
At 11 pm when the main hatchway caved in, this Turkey said:
“Fellows it’s been good to know 'ya.”
This turkey said “nuff said” one too many times!
(sorta)
Peace,
mangeorge
…and with strange aeons, even turkey may die…
And with that it is over.
This turkey told Tommy to get his shinebox and was buried upstate.
This turkey used a match to check for a gas leak.
This turkey operated the hair dryer while sleeping in the bathtub. Precooked.
Silly turkey. If you’re gonna do that, you gotta stand back!
This turkey declared war on the Allies in 1914.