Gack! Thomas Kinkade, Painter of Light, has made a movie! It’s got Peter O’Toole! Sweet Jesus, will any Doper be brave enough to watch this and report back? Personally, I don’t have the stomach for it. It’s got Chris Elliot though, and I always thought that guy was a riot. This Vanity Fair article talks about Thomas Kinkade’s Christmas Cottage. Check out The sixteen guidelines for creating the “The Thomas Kinkade Look”.
I’m too afraid to even click on the links. A few days ago there was a thread about his NASCAR painting, and I still have blisters on my corneas.
May it go over as well as his planned community.
My favorite part of the article was the comparison to Jack Chick.
What can it be? As the Inventor of Light (or whatever he claims), will he have the occasional sparkle on the actors’ teeth ala Kyle Waggoner from the Carol Burnett Show? Will shiny twinkles emit from the sets? Does the action pause when these luminary events occur?
I’ll admit I’m embarrassed FOR Peter O’Toole. Does he need money that badly? 
I’m embarrassed for Peter O’Toole and Jared Padalecki (fortunately, the latter has Friday the Thirteenth coming out next year). Yeeesh.
Possibly this should go over to Cafe Society?
::nitpick::Lyle Waggoner.
I’m not clicking on the link either. Is this a TV movie, or go-to-the-movies-and-buy-a-ticket-you-sucker movie?
A sequential thread title winner:
Your Most Embarrassing Moment/Experience
Thomas Kinkade: The Movie
My favorite tip:
So…filmmakers are supposed to put random Ns in the movie?
Possibly the most horrifying movie ever made.
SO it appears. I’ll be skipping this one.
I love item 12, in which Kinkade explains how certain things are done “in the realm of fine art.” In particular, he mentions the role of teddy bears in fine art.
Did anyone else notice the names on the movie poster? O’toole’s name was over his head, Gay-Harden and Padalecki were switched. That annoys the crap out of me. Either match them all or none!
In that article, it’s pretty funny how blatantly Kincade confuses depth of field with focal length. The man doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
Is he reprising his role in Caligula?
I’m thinking references to Evie and Winsor scrawled on quaint yet sketchy bathroom stalls.
"In a world where dogs play billiards and Elvis Presley is the king of black velvet, one heroic artist will set out to paint the globe in surreal, saturated pastels…"
Didn’t they make a movie based on that Christmas Shoes song?
Hopefully only in my own personal hell.
Straight-to-home-video. The fact that it doesn’t even rate a spot in ABC Family’s month-long all-Christmas programming extravaganza is a pretty good indication of how bad it is.
I like the way, in his 16 points, Kinkade seems to be trying to tell the cinematographer how to do his or her job. Even though he doesn’t know the difference between depth of field and focal length.
"Hidden N’s throughout – preferably thirty N’s, commemorating one N for each year since the events happened. "
What events? How deliciously enigmatic…