Little stupid things that are pissing me off but not worth making a whole thread over:
Multiple babies yowling in the library. Some fun for the people studying in there, you bet.
Cashiers who open a new till and don’t make the people who swoop up to it go after the people who have been standing in line for 10 minutes already at a different till.
My knee - what the hell was that loud pop and stabbing pain?!? Don’t you know that I need to get about another 35 years out of you?
My cat - come in here and whine for half an hour again, and you’re getting put in the basement for the rest of the afternoon. I have other things to do than play with you - go play with the other cat.
My job - you hired me for part-time and specific duties. Now you tell me I have to go full-time and do a whole bunch of other duties or I’m fired. That’s not fair. (Yes, I know, life isn’t fair, blah blah blah.)
To eBay dealers and other peer-to-peer sellers who will ship to the continental US only or say “these shipping charges are for continental US only,” despite the fact that they’re going to use the US Postal Service: Hawaii is part of the United States, you doofuses. Sending a package via USPS from Connecticut to Hawaii does not cost more than sending it from Connecticut to Florida, even though we are “overseas.” Do not try to fool me; the USPS website has a rate calculator. You don’t even have to worry about specially wrapping the package! They’re brought here in modern planes and ships! They aren’t going to be forced through some hellish gauntlet of angry volcano goddesses, giant killer sharks, and letter-eating coconuts!
To eBusinesses who will only ship to Hawaii using overnight or two-day express:
FYI, because we’re so far away from anywhere, overnight delivery is impossible. Two-day service is killer expensive. Look, eCommerce! I’m trying to support you! I love you! I’d buy even more if you just gave me cheaper options!
My camera - Today I was trying to take pictures of bikes going very fast (well as fast as 20,30,40 year old bikes can go) I know there is a delay on it for focusing, so there is a feature to set the focus beforehand allowing for instant snaps. But I follow the bike perfectly, press the button, hear the click, then get shown a picture of a road. You see the camera takes the picture a couple of miliseconds after the screen has gone blank, so I can’t see where the bike is while the camera actually takes the picture.
I got a few pretty good pictures of bikes simply by guessing at the bike’s position.
Also I am pitting my webspace, for not having worked for several months, so I can’t upload pictures of bikes to show dopers interested in the TT
To AQA, examinations board from hell - why, why, why do you give me one exam, two weeks of sitting on my ass, and then six exams in three days? Where’s the fucking logic?!
And to Nokia, phone company from hell - why does my phone not work? Why? Do you want me to get a replacement, is that it? Do you want me to get the fourth replacement in a year? Does this not scream “incompetence!” to you?
And to my school and its firewall from hell - you’re blocking Hotmail now? And Livejournal? And Yahoo? What next, Google? The SDMB? And why, why, why does the SDMB’s downtime coincide with my only free time? Why? Does the universe hate me that much?
Random guy who wanted to hug me yesterday - What the heck? Do I look like a hug dispenser to you? You are so not copping a feel.
Spanish finals - I don’t like you. I like my teacher; I like the language; but I hate these damn finals. HATE HATE HATE. So much hate like you wouldn’t believe.
People who attempted to rob our empty rental house, causing prospective renters to flee - I hate you, bastards. I hope you feel like complete and utter fuckheads for kicking in a poor, helpless door when the house was completely EMPTY! What a waste of effort, you stupid dickfaces! You already did this once–I assume it’s the same people, the neighborhood isn’t that fucking bad–and you got JACK for your trouble, and then you assholes came and did it again! And again you got jack! Are you going to keep breaking down our doors til someone moves in? Fuckers.
You call a company and get put on hold for 15 minutes, 20 minutes, half an hour. So you start doing something else to pass the time–staring at your computer, reading your mail, posting to the SDMB. Then they finally come on the line and right away it’s “CompanyXmayIhaveyouraccountnumberplease . . . (pause 0.15 seconds) Hello? Hello? Sir, are you there? Will you please state your account number this instant” and it’s like fuck, you make we wait for half an hour and then expect me to be available and poised with all of the information you need at my fingertips the instant you finally fucking deign to answer my call???
I’ve had extremely bad luck with tires in the last 2 weeks. First, I got a flat on my bike tire by running over a nail (there’s a pit thread about it, but it wasn’t very good, so I won’t bother to post a link). Then, three days later, I get another flat tire on my bike on the same trail, only on a broken bottle this time.
Now today, I take my car in to get an oil change, and I am swiftly informed that I 1) my car has gone out of alignment, causing 2) all 4 tires to be worn unevenly, necessitating 3) 4 new tires and a wheel alignment. Total cost: $350.
My (expletive deleted) coworker who was supposed to meet me for a road trip at 6:45 on the east side of town tomorrow morning. The east side. Near where I live and closer to our destination (4 hours northeast). He calls me half an hour ago to say he needs to be picked up at his house–which is on the far west side of town. This means instead of leaving my house at 6:30, I now have to leave my house at 5:30…drive 30 minutes to the west side of town (following convoluted directions)and then drive 45 minutes back to the far east side, before driving the 4 hours to the meeting. Same extra driving when we get home late tomorrow night.
He has a wife and two grown children and 3 cars. You’d think ONE of them could give him a lift to the rendezvous point. Or at least pick him up at night. But no…
Just who the FUCK decided my time was worth so little and theirs so much.
I am soooo pissed.
Glad to see this mini rant thread, cuz this was hardly worth a full rant.
I’ve had a headache for 2 days which is not going away. The pain killers are upsetting my stomach.
While taking the bus home today - early - I had the misfortune to catch the same bus that the high-school students cuaght. Guys, I know it’s almost summer vacation and I know you’re bubbling over with giddy anticipation of your freedom, but if you could keep such giddy juiblation under 200 dB, that would be swell.
I have 3 mosquito bites - they are itchy - I may have West Nile Virus, but probably not.
To the ladies in the JC Penney’s fitting room this past weekend - look, I know it sucks to have to wait on line to try things on. But would you kindly not leave your children behind to “hold” the cubicle for you while you saunter about looking for more things to try on? (I actually saw two separate women do this, one of whom left a son who was probably 10 years old or so and extremely bored; the other child was a girl of about 7.) Not only is this rude to the folks waiting their turn, but it’s not exactly the best thing in the world these days to leave your child unsupervised like that, is it?
To the cop who gifted me with a $105 ticket last Thursday for double parking during alternate side hours while leaving every other double-parked car on the block untouched - thanks a lot, jerk, but ain’t no way I’m paying this. There are plenty other ways to make your monthly ticket quota - just get off your butt before the last couple days of the month, okay?
To this guy for being a creepy ass pedophile and ever being in the same building as me. Was my boyfriend’s teacher a few years back, now I am entirely skeeved out at the fact that there is a chance he may have thought about my boyfriend in a really creepy way. Ew.
disclaimer: innocent until proven guilty, I know. but he’s 47, and a TEACHER, it is still really creepy, even if he thought the boy was 18.
this is probably worthy of its own thread but I am not motivated enough to do it.
People who open GQ threads intending to debate whether an answer is “right” or not. “Correct” or not? Go for it – that’s what it’s all about. But here’s a handy thread-originating guide:
IF YOU INTEND IN ADVANCE TO ARGUE THE ANSWER, DON’T ASK THE FUCKING QUESTION.
To my university, for screwing up. I withdrew from two of my classes this last semester. I withdrew a week before the deadline. I left the papers at the office. At the end of the semester I contacted them to make sure everything was okay. They sent my email to “someone higher up” to confirm that everything was fine. They never contacted me for a month. NOW I get a letter that I “failed” those two courses. I am sooooo going to contest this. I have everything documented (emails, etc…)
To the bank that handles my student loans. You are incompetent and have lost THREE sets of forms confirming my continuing enrollment in school this last year. It is YOUR fault. I had forms signed and sent to you in September. And again in January when you deigned to inform me that you “never received” the first ones. And then again in April when you finally pulled your thumb out and realized that you hadn’t received those ones either. And now I get a call that you’ve sent my loan to a collection agency. Goddammit. This is your fault. I’ve sent you numerous forms, by registered mail. And I’ll be continuing as a student for several more years. I am not in repayment status for my loan, and I won’t be for quite a while. And by the way, if you lost my forms, and I don’t see how I should have to pay interest on my loan for that period. You screwed up. Not me.
And to my mother. This is definitely a mini-mini rant. Please don’t leave the computer chair so low. You are not that short. We have the same inseam, and we’re both the same height when sitting. So why do you lower the chair as low as it will go every time you use the computer? I know it only takes a few seconds to readjust, but it’s damn annoying.
Damn allergy. I can’t breathe; if I’m not totally congested then I’m sneezing and dripping. My throat itches, my head hurts and the damn allergy medicine isn’t working. And there’s no one to sympathize with me
My fucking moronic sister. I am so sick of hearing, year after year after year after year of how much money you have, how perfect your kids are, how great your life is, how gorgeous you are, how everything in your life is just goddamn PERFECT!
So, how come you’re out hunting 18 year old boys (at age 40) and you claim to hate your husband and everybody is shit but you? Answer me, goddammit, you flea-bitten sleaze bag.
And stop calling our mother to bitch about your “horrible life”, you fucking loser. It ain’t her fucking fault you’re a piece of possum shit. Guess what??? It is *** YOUR FUCKING FAULT***. Not everything in this world is everybody else’s fault. GET OVER YOURSELF! The world doesn’t really, after all, revolve around, YOU!
Oh yeah…and your youngest kid is the biggest brat on this earth, thanks to you. He was cute at age 2. He is not cute now, at age ten. And he won’t be a “model” just because you think he’s the goddamn best thing to come along since Shirley Temple. Just shut the hell up. No really. Just SHUT UP.
Thanks for the mini-pit-rant. I’m sure I’ll get to scream this at her at much louder decibals at a later date, but for the time being…this was really therapeutic.
I’m not sure I can compete after Sylkyn, but here goes anyway.
To the office doofuses and doofettes in my building:
Do not crowd the lift (elevator) doors when they open.
Do NOT try to enter the lift until I have fully exited.
Your gape of astonishment as doors open – “woah, there’s people in there and they want to get out of the lift!” – will irritate me and ensure that I push you aside even more rudely. I will probably get idiot germs on my suit from brushing your sorry arse aside, but that’s a price I’m willing to pay. It should NOT come as a surpise to you that when you summon a lift from the ground floor, people will already be in it. There are over 1000 people in this building; during office hours, a percentage of these people will be in the lifts. These people must be able to EXIT said lifts BEFORE you try to get in at the ground floor.
I have so much pent up Hulk like rage that has been building up for months. Guess I should start with the latest.
To Community College… Fuck you and illiterate ass twidlers that run you. You won’t let me take a class that my college says I can take because you made up a prerequisite that isn’t required at ANY major Texas university. ANY!!!. ANd then you won’t wave me and everyone else into the class that are only at 1/4 capacity. Why??? Because no one has heard of the prereq you require your GED flunkies to take. Community college is supposed to be convenient!!! I don’t want to graduate from your shithole, I just want to take a fucking class so i can graduate next may from real college.
To Dell… Fuck you. you owe me a $150 rebate. Don’t offer them if you can’t come through. Don’t fucking transfer me 7 TIMES!!! and still not give an answer. I know where you live.
To Kohl’s department store… A big fuck you!!! Don’t make me drive 4 hours to fucking Dallas and back for a second round interview and then not have the fucking courtesy to send me a rejection letter. Rejection is a part of life and I’m cool with it, but making my ass wait months to hear from you sacks of shit blows. Two months after I should have received my rejection I still haven’t heard jack shit. Return calls assholes. Learn some fucking class.
To the Physcotic Goddess Whom Resides Over Michigan Weather.
It is June 3rd. It is 54 degrees right now at 830am
All the seeds…ALL THE SEEDS I planted last week ( pumpkins, squash, watermelon, six rows of corn) are now rotting in the soil due to you and your PMS.
In case you missed it, we had frost on June 1st. Frost! Frost is acceptable in early to mid May, but not in the sixth month, you bitch. WE deserve a break from the craptacular winters that are drawn out longer and longer and longer every year. We deserve a longer spring than forty six seconds. We deserve a Summer that is not filled with West Nile Virus panics, lyme disease and mosquitoes that could carry of a chihuahua.
I would, just for once, like to be able to have a summer where I didn’t have to coat my skin with all kinds of petrochemicals to repell the bugs. Do you think I like having this third arm growing out of neck?
I just replanted two rows last night of corn and had to go back out to the store to purchase more seed ( corn, flowers) which cost me $30 because, well, it just did. And it is your friggin’ fault because you are not inclined to let go of winter and let us poor, pathetic Michiganians bask in UV rays for more than twenty minutes a day.
It’s not like we are going to get skin cancer at the rate you don’t let us see the sunshine. The weather forecast for the next six days has several days of 60’s, overcast and rain. We are not England, y’know, old girl. We are Michigan. The Mitten State. We supply cars to the world and have really not much else to offer except potholes and Yooper jokes. Give us a break, will you old girl?
When, dare I ask, will you be over this winter funk so that I may plant all my new purty seeds and watch them grow?
