Time travel is one of those topics that frequently pops up here on the dope, especially in GQ and IMHO ranging from possibility of said technology to if you could send a piece of technology back in time what would you send, and multiple variations of the theme.
Here’s the joke:
Guy decides is would be great to take a smart phone back in time to amaze famous scientists such as Leonardo DaVinci, etc. So he travels back in time and hops out of his time machine carrying a brand new iPhone walks up to DaVinci who is quite simply amazed at the arrival of this stranger before him. The guy says holding up the iPhone, “I am from the future and I have brought to you this amazing device that will allow us to talk wirelessly, play music, collect data such as the weather, be our personal organizer, etc.” DaVinci looks at him for a second, and says “Fuck that, let me see your time machine!”
The Time Machine will be more impressive. Try getting a WiFi link in Italy in 1500, let alone accessing websites for weather and the like. Leonardo will think you’ve got a nifty portable light source and chime, though.
Personally, I’m putting my money on da Vinci himself being a time traveler. Picture the scene: your average Joe gets ahold of a time machine, travels back to the past to visit Leonardo with a bunch of sketches of modern day inventions he can impress him with, then finds that he’s the one who has to fill the role.
It’s tough to make the joke work on it’s own, the time machine is obviously better technology than a cell phone. It needs some kind of set up to de-emphasize the time machine.
Guy decides it would be great to show a smart phone to such famous scientists as Leonardo DaVinci, etc. in orde to amaze them. So he walks up to Leonardo carrying a brand new iPhone who is quite simply awed at the arrival of this stranger before him. The guy says holding up the iPhone, “I am from the future and I have brought to you this amazing device that will allow us to talk wirelessly, play music, collect data such as the weather, be our personal organizer, etc.” DaVinci looks at him for a second, and says “Fuck that, let me see your time machine!”
Getting there. Other reactions from scientists that don’t focus on the time machine would help in the set up. The time machine gets mentioned up front, but the expected reactions from other scientists distract the listener from it. The punch line is pretty good, people aren’t expecting Da Vinci to say “Fuck that”.
I think the joke would work better if the premise was a little more in-depth. For example:
A historian and a scientist are in a bar having an argument. The scientist says that if she were to go back to the renaissance and show the average man an iPhone, they would accuse her of witchcraft and burn her at the stake. The historian says that’s nonsense, the superstitiousness of people back then has been heavily exaggerated.
They can’t come to an agreement so they decide there’s only one way to settle this. The scientist gets her time machine and they both time travel back to the renaissance and find a peasant man walking along a road. The scientist shows the peasant her iPhone. Rather than draw back in fear, the peasant is intrigued by the various features, and is even able to ask fairly intelligent questions about how it works, with the historian smiling smugly the entire time.
Finally, the peasant asks “Where did you strange travelers come from?” The scientist says “Oh, we’re from the future, we came here through that time machine.” The peasant’s eyes grow wide in fear, and he shouts “Witch!”
A historian and a scientist are in a bar having an argument. The scientist says that if she were to go back to the renaissance and show Leonardo Da Vinci an iPhone, he would accuse her of witchcraft and burn her at the stake. The historian says that’s nonsense; in those days the peasants were superstitious, but the educated people back then were rational thinkers.
They can’t come to an agreement, so they decide there’s only one way to settle this. The scientist gets her time machine and they both time travel back to the renaissance and land the time machine right outside Leonardo’s house.
Not at all superstitious, Leonardo, is intrigued by the various features, and is even able to ask fairly intelligent questions about how it works, with the historian smiling smugly the entire time.
Then naturally, he asks “Where did you strange travelers come from?” The scientist says “Oh, we’re from the future, we came here through that time machine which we parked right there across the street.”
“Wow” answers Leonardo, “a time machine! That’s the most amazing technology I can imagine—show me how it works.”
The scientist says, “fine, but we just shut off the engine, so it will take a few minutes till we re-start it and open the portal. Wait here in the house, we’ll go start it, and call you when it’s ready. In the meantime, feel free to examine the iPhone.” The scientist walks across the street to the time machine.
Five minutes later, the scientist calls out “okay…The amazing technology is up and running… Leonado, come on into our time machine.”
But Leonardo stays in his room and answers : “Fuck that…I’ve just found 14.7 giga of porn!”
This thread is fun. I get a little of the feeling I got when I first heard the Beatles Anthology albums – getting to witness a collaborative creative process.
