[QUOTE=Leviosaurus] Heavy Sigh. I offer humorous commentary, decorate it with fantastical numbers, draw hilarious and unlikely conclusions juxtaposed against a backdrop of dark comedy, and all you post in response is cold logic. Such is the death of the great classic tradition of sarcasm and schadenfreude-laced discourse on the SDMB. Maybe free subscriptions will bring it back.
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Sorry, I had just seen my new “performance review sheet” for the upcoming year, which has no less than 5 major and 17 sub-categories to review my performance for the upcoming year, each one a 3-paragraph essay of unreasonable and sometimes impossible goals, all so I get out of the “average performer” box they stick 91% of the company in each year to get only an inflation-rate COLA. So I was humour-impaired.
[QUOTE=sturmhauke]
What is the point of a weapon that is so powerful it can only be wielded with difficulty?
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To ask such a question demonstrates that you clearly have no doubts on the topic of your manhood.
[QUOTE=Una Persson]
I can easily see the following situation: dude is trying to set up satellite dish system, “saving money” by doing it himself, even though he’s a complete and total fuckup for a handyman. He doesn’t have a hammer, he has a brick wrapped in duct tape. He had a power drill once but his kid set it on fire trying to drill through the DVD player. His screwdriver set is a cheap Ugandan slave-labour-made set he got as a 15th anniversary present from his job at the Honey-wagon septic tank sucking company. It consists of 1 rounded “flat” blade, one Phillips blade which was long since rendered useless by prying out broken glass from his truck tires, and one Torx-bit which doesn’t fit anything manufactured in a country with a vowel in its name.
The kids are screaming and fighting, and the wife is asking him when he’s going to be done, and why doesn’t he pay the $99 to have it installed. He keeps trying but can’t figure it out, and then gashes himself with the rounded flat-blade screwdriver. Maybe his life sucks in general and each day he thinks about driving his pickup off the highway and into a bridge pillar. Maybe his job involves getting kicked in the family jewels hard and without mercy every single day. Maybe alcohol, pot, and/or pills are involved, who knows. It’s cold in the house because the last time they turned on their Kero-Sun heater they all saw Jesus asking them to come and visit grandma and their dead pets. He gashes himself again, and he watches his blood, falling in slow motion, landing on the bare plywood floor (the Labradors ate the carpet…) next to a crusted piece of old cat vomit, with a stop-action splash. The kids are outside SCREAMING at the top of their lungs and fighting AGAIN. “DADDY JIMMY HIT ME!” “NO I DIDN’T, LIAR!” “YES YOU DID, DADDY! DADDY! DADDY! DADDY! DAD-DY! DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-DY! WHY AREN’T YOU PAYING ATTENTION TO ME!?”, and the wife is telling him “God damn it, call the fucking company and have someone install it! You know you can’t do this! You always get into these things and I’m tired of it!” and then he just snaps.<snip>
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Brrrr. That’s a chillingly realistic scenario.
[QUOTE=sturmhauke]
What is the point of a weapon that is so powerful it can only be wielded with difficulty?
[/QUOTE]
The 600 Nitro Express revolver is admittedly a “macho” weapon, but you know, I’d still like to fire it once.
The 700 Nitro Express rifle, on the other hand, has a single purpose: bring down the largest of game under any and all circumstances. The catch is that in order to ensure that you have the ability to do so, you have to spend up to $100 a shot to practice. It’s a safari rifle, nothing more and nothing less.
[QUOTE=Airman Doors, USAF]
The 600 Nitro Express revolver is admittedly a “macho” weapon, but you know, I’d still like to fire it once.
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I fired a Desert Eagle at a range once, that was plenty enough kick for me.
The guy in the 700 video, unlike the guy in the 600 video, seemed well prepared for the recoil, and still struggled to keep the gun under control. I have doubts about the damn thing’s accuracy, and I’d be afraid if I tried to shoot at a charging cape buffalo that I’d get knocked on my ass and then trampled.
If you want to see the ultimate in ridiculously overpowered personal weaponry, check out Nock’s Volley Gun. This late 18th century longarm had 7 fucking barrels, and apparently had the unfortunate tendency of breaking the wielder’s shoulder when fired.
I know this isn’t a gun control thread, 'cuz the OP said so, but would it be Constitutional to deny stupid people guns? I mean it’s not like they are strict on SAT scores for joining the cops* or the military.
