I’m in the process of writing my memoir, a fairly involved process.
The general gist is how the environment affects our personality and development.
My ?, Is it worth pursuing a lawsuit against my step-mother who lied and spread malicious gossip about me for over twenty years or write about it and inform the family about the truth this way. Her lies & manipulations went as far as to make my father strap my bare backside up to age 17. I caught her listening once. Too many other things to list here. She has turned everyone in family against me.
Can someone be sued for lying and psychological abuse? If it is not worth the trouble & time can said defendant sue for defamation against the truth?
Hi there,
Yes truth is a valid defense and there is plenty of evidence I have a permanent scar on my right cheek from said defendant when I was ten, witnessed by father.
Problem is rest of family say I was just a naughty little boy. Kinda hard to accept as they knew of my autistic traits known back then as ADHD.
My intention is to show a correlation between her suspected mental instability as a mental illness or other. I find it hard to believe anyone can do this out of sheer malice.
Sounds like much more trouble than it is worth. Better to just move on with your life. You could write the memoir as catharsis or to help other people going through similar difficulties, but you aren’t going to get much out trying to discredit the woman. People will just see it as attention seeking behavior. Tell the truth if someone asks or brings up the topic, but there’s not much point in bringing it up yourself.
Why don’t you speak with a lawyer licensed in your state? I would think your chances of having a valid lawsuit are slim and none – but why ask strangers on the Internet when you can speak with someone who actually knows?
The law does not right all wrongs. Neither a lawsuit or a tell-all book will undo what has been done to you. Go ahead if you feel you need to, but understand that the people you want to hurt wont care what you have to say anyway.
In order to prove defamation you will have to prove that she made inaccurate factual statements about you. Not that she told people her negative opinions but that the statements were factual and she knew those factual statements to be wrong. Also that the statements were not vulgar abuse and she intended the statements to be taken literally and they were not made in a fit of anger. If you do prove all of that you will then have to prove that the slander caused you actual harm.
I have no legal training at atll, but I would be shocked if you could get a lawyer to represent you or a court to hear this case.
Living well is the best revenge.
No-one cares about your theory of “how the environment affects our personality and development”. If you want to write a memoir, write a memoir, and let other people reach the conclusions.
But chances are no-one will read your memoir unless you are an unusually talented writer or famous in some other regard.
Don’t forget, a common reaction of people who are being sued is to countersue. So you could sue your stepmother for defamation, only to have her turn around and sue you for defaming her in your lawsuit. For that matter, you could publish a memoir calling her a liar and abuser, and she could then sue you for libel.
A lot of people have had unhappy childhoods and will carry scars, both physical and psychological, with them the rest of their lives. I wish I could say that most people had happy childhoods and enjoy their families, but I think that that is not the case.
You say your step mother has turned the rest of your family against you. She may have the influence of status within the family and other may well be inclined to believe her regardless of how much evidence is exposed through either a memoir or a lawsuit. In their eyes you may come off as whiny and vindictive.
You can not control what other people think of you and you can’t make people like or love you.
Now is the time to move forward and take control of your life. Don’t look towards the past, but to the future. Move on both psychologically and physically. Take a hiatus from your family and move someplace where you make new friends. Find what makes you happy and pursue that with an eye always on the future.
You sound like a huge drama queen. Your memoir-expose revenge plan is supremely idiotic. Many of us have had toxic parents, relatives or SOs screwing up our lives when we were kids. It happens. You get over it by living well as an adult and not indulging childish fantasies of revenge.
Stop dwelling on whippings you got at age 10. It’s mentally dysfunctional. You need to move on. Don’t you have concrete, productive things to do in your life as an adult man? This silly plan will yield nothing but wasted time and high drama.
I think it’s weird that you seem to blame your stepmother for your father beating you. A lawsuit sounds like a waste of your mental energy. Better spend that on some good therapy.
Thanks for the helpful advice and by making me feel welcome.
I think I needed to hear this from others that were not afraid to tell me straight instead of telling me something they thought they wanted me to hear.
