To the assistant county clerk that makes me want to use the C-word

The BBQ Pit
1

Hi Sweetie -

You should understand this, but apparently you don’t. So, I will try to make it clear for you.

My job frequently requires me to get information, documents, etc., from your office. Now, here’s a news flash. Are you sitting down?

You work in a COUNTY CLERK’S office. One of the main purposes of your office is to serve as a repository of information that people come and obtain.

So all of your sighs, rolled eyes, icy words and open contempt you display to me everytime I come there really don’t amount to a hill of ant shit. I still need the stuff I need, and it’s still YOUR JOB to get it for me.

I have been nothing but courteous to you every single time, too. Do you know that it isn’t easy to be courteous in response to someone who treats you like a sub-human for no reason, other than that you are forcing them to do the job for which they are paid? But, on the plus side, it does seem to piss you off even more.

Perhaps someone working in a county clerk’s office should not have “I don’t have to do that” as a mantra. Try, “How can I help?” Nah; I’m just kidding. Your head might explode or something if you did that.

Despite the fact that you inconvenience me, I take a little perverse delight at the fact that, more than once now, you’ve expended more energy not helping me than you would have had you just helped.

I have toyed with the idea of wallpapering your office with Freedom of Information Act requests, asking for info such as the weekly breakdown of the amount paid for dental insurance for every left-handed janitor working in the county building for the past 15 years. Just because I can. Think getting off that straining roller-chair is a chore now?

But, maybe some other day.

At least I can take some solace in the fact that you seem to work in a job you hate, facing person after person that you loathe coming to the counter, to make you do tasks you can’t stand. That clock edging toward your retirement is a slow-ticking motherfucker, innit? ::tee-hee::

Well, see you next time.

2

I detect a Stage V ass pole. Terminal, I’m afraid.

3

Why don’t you ask her sometime why she hates her job so much? That usually pisses people off royally. Plus, it has the added benefit of maybe, just maybe, encouraging her to do her job a little better. Or quit.

4

Next time, bring her flowers, and compliment her on her wig…er…hair. Don’t forget to thank her for helping you out (which I imagine you do, anyway).

5

Seriously, though. Next time you’re in there, bring a big bag of hard candies and some kind of K-Mart candy dish, and tell her, with perfect sincerity, “You know, my grandma [or mom, or Aunt Ruth, or whoever] used to work in an office just like this, and one thing she really enjoyed doing was keeping a dish of sourballs [or whatever] on the counter for folks to help themselves. And I spend so much time in here, and it just really brings my grandma back to me, so would you mind if I donated this candy dish to your office, and kept it filled? Just in memory of Grandma?”

Pure BS, I know, but she won’t know that. Try it.

And then remember to bring candy when it gets low, or God help you, boy. :smiley:

6

DDG: Just out of curiosity, what would that accomplsh?

7

Um, it might make her like him better? It might make her less cranky? It might make her realize that there are caring, nice people out there, that not everybody is an asshole? It might make her look at him in a new way, like he’s a regular human being? “All the other people who come in here are jerks and assholes, except for that guy who brings me candy”?

If nothing else, for the reason that sometimes officious clerks who are so shallow that they take their frustration out on the general public are also frequently so shallow that they may be easily bribed with candy.

8

However, you may get her into trouble. Candy at the work station may not have “management approval”.

Yes, I’ve heard that where I work, along with “That’s not an approved activity”, even though both of my hands were visible.

9

Talk to her boss. Several letters, with dates and quotes, may lit a fire under her.