It was a big enough pain in the ass that a friend had to call me and tell me someone sent him an IM with my AIM name. Luckily, he knew it wasn’t me, as I’m more circumspect than “Wanna fuck?”
It was an even bigger and less welcome pain to get out of the shower tonight only to hear the phone ring and the same friend tell me whoever it was had come back for more. I jumped online with my other SN. Another friend sent an IM to the same effect. I got hold of your dumb ass and let you know I was onto you. Some general angry back-and-forth ensued. You tried the old “I know where you live” bit. Creepy, but not terrifying, as I have a .38 caliber welcome available for unwanted house guests.
One friend keeps IMing with you, and relaying information back to me. I’m already pissed off, when he mentioned a familiar name, one not likely to be often heard. And I realize I fucking know you. This is your idea of a joke. I’m not amused. I’m well beyond “not amused.”
“Don’t be mad” you typed. I am fucking well beyond mad. I’m enraged. I could beat you cheerfully, smiling and whistling a jaunty tune. Does it sound like I appreciate the joke?
You then had the nerve to ask how the paper was going. Well, you stupid bastard, the paper has been put on hold for now as I spent a good long while figuring out your identity. Now I’m too keyed up either to read or sleep, so you’ve doubly screwed me there. Lovely joke, was it not? Next time I see you, remind me to show you the prank that involves a good swift kick in the nuts. I find that one absolutely hilarious.
I’m too pissed to think of a snappy ending to this rant. Sorry to anyone who received an oddly forward IM from “me.”