I just took a huge pay cut and turned town several months of possibly collecting unemployment, and I’m quite happy about it. Why? Because I am so sick and tired of being fucked with by the Philly School System! Tired, tired, tired of these people taking teachers full of energy and slowly squeezing it out of them with a willy-nilly team of bureaucratic ass clowns. (Is ass clowns supposed to be hyphenated?)
To Paul Vallas (Superintendent):
You claim to know what goes on in your schools, but every time you are supposed to show up at a school and employees scramble to greet you, and you stand us up. Three times in my experience no less. If you knew these kids you would not be getting rid of many vocational programs, many of the kids never even contemplate college. Yes, their test scores are important, but the kids needs should come first.
Oh, and it wouldn’t hurt if you’d put a few competent people in the administrative offices so that the “New Teacher Incentives” would include the actual check that is promised and that it would not be four months late. Ahem…
To Ed Rendell (Governor):
I sat in the audience when you addressed the teacher’s union and I heard you say, “Our kids need more Art and Music.” Really? Then why did I, a certified Art Teacher get a letter saying that I may or may not have my job next year with the district, due to layoffs. How does a district give kids more Art while they layoff Art Teachers? I heard no mention of an Art Teacher Cloning Program (patent pending). Not to mention when I was a waitress, I waited on you. You tip for shit and your table manners are atrocious.
To the Teacher’s Union:
You are the lucky winner of my Mixed Reviews Award! You were there to listen to my groaning about workman’s comp and my missing money. The job I got filling in for a Teacher That Doesn’t Exert Any More Effort Than Absolutely Required (TTDEAMETAR). So, outshining him didn’t take much. But I [preacher sermon voice] believe in the power of Art [/preacher sermon voice] and I know what “non-tenured Art Teacher” means. It means being aesthetic task monkey for administration. I am Bulletin Board Bitch, I am Signage Slave, I am Graphic Design Grunt. As an aside, I will get the kids to behave and work as well as learn a few things. Just when everything is going according to plan (I am behaving, and doing a good job) the school requests re-allocation of funds so that I can be a permanent teacher there. Me, they liked me because I did my job. But noooo, it doesn’t work that way. If a job gets created it will belong to whomever has enough seniority to get it because of union rules, i. e. not me and perhaps another TTDEAMETAR.
To Edison Schools:
I’d sooner clean toilets with my certification than to ever work for you ever, ever again. (I’d like my dignity done medium-rare please.)
To the private school that just hired me:
I am a troublemaker, but I am trying to be good. You really don’t have to try all that hard to do better than these folks. I’ll really try to be good.
To the waitress:
I asked for my dignity medium-rare, there must have been a mistake, because this appears to be over-done. Oh, you’re out of that, I’ll take the vegetarian plate then, thanks.