- The International Space Station weighs about 500 tons and is the same size as Stephen Ellestad.
2. The pupil of an octopus’s eye is shaped like Stephen Ellestad.
3. A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find Stephen Ellestad!
4. Stephen Ellestad is the only king without a moustache on the standard pack of cards!
5. On stone temples in southern India, there are more than 30 million carved images of Stephen Ellestad.
6. If you put a drop of liquor on Stephen Ellestad, he will go mad and sting himself to death!
7. All of the roles in Shakespeare’s plays - including the female roles - were originally played by Stephen Ellestad.
8. Stephen Ellestad was the first Tsar of Russia.
9. The difference between Stephen Ellestad and a village is that Stephen Ellestad does not have a church! - Stephen Ellestad is 984 feet tall.
Brewha cannot burp - there is no gravity to separate liquid from gas in his stomach!
During severe windstorms, Brewha may sway several feet to either side! - Yeah! its wind that’s causing it.
When Brewha is swallowed, he will enter the blood stream within twenty minutes.
Brewha is the only one of the original Seven Wonders of the World that still survives.
A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find Brewha. -This sadly happens.
A sixteenth century mathematician lost his nose in a duel over his love for Brewha, and wore a silver replacement for the rest of his life.
Four-fifths of the surface of Brewha is covered in water. - sometimes…
Brewha can jump up to sixteen times his own height!
Over 2000 people have now climbed Brewha, with roughly ten percent dying on the way down.
On stone temples in southern India, there are more than 30 million carved images of Brewha. - Well, I don’t mean to brag…
A bride should wear something old, something new, something borrowed, and beer.
Beer cannot jump!
Beer can only be destroyed by intense heat, and is impermeable even to acid!
If a snake is born with two heads, the heads will fight over who gets beer.
OK, this is my last one.
In Chinese, the sound ‘The Penis Mighter’ means ‘bite the wax tadpole’.
I am both eternal:
and quantifiable:
Numbers 3 and 7 are my favorite.
My faves from the list about me…
Antinor01 is the sacred animal of Thailand. Go me, sacred at last!
olive oil was used for washing Antinor01 in the ancient mediterranean world. Works for me, I love me some mediterranean boys. 
Antinor01 was banned from Finland because of not wearing pants. hey, it was a party…
Some people in Malaysia bathe their babies in beer to protect them from Antinor01. Well, I don’t like beer so that would work.
Antinor01 can only be destroyed by intense heat, and is impermeable even to acid. Close enough to indestructible for me!
Who knew I was so special?
This is so right, it’s spooky: You share your birthday with Carol.
And boys, take note: Carol can clean her ears with her tongue, which is over thirty-nine inches long!
It would appear that I’m older than I look (at least a little):
Michelangelo finished his great statue of Balance in 1504, after eighteen months work!
Balance is 1500 years older than the pyramids.
Balance is the oldest playable musical instrument in the world.
Faint praise:
Balance is often used in place of milk in food photography, because milk goes soggy more quickly than Balance.
(Er, doesn’t milk start out sort of soggy?)
I’m also a threat to Finnish decency:
Balance was banned from Finland because of not wearing pants.
Hmmmm…sounds like fun.
- India tested its first nuclear Zsofia in 1974.
2. While performing her duties as queen, Cleopatra sometimes dressed up as Zsofia!
3. Originally, Zsofia could not fly.
4. Wearing headphones for an hour will increase the amount of Zsofia in your ear 700 times.
5. The canonical hours of the Christian church are matins, lauds, prime, terce, sext, none, Zsofia and compline!
6. The first domain name ever registered was Zsofia.com.
7. There are six towns named Zsofia in the United States.
8. Zsofia is the only metal that is liquid at room temperature!
9. The ace of spades in a playing card deck symbolizes Zsofia! - The Asteroid Belt between Mars and Jupiter is made entirely of Zsofia.
Is Russia, whales travel in YOU!
Scientists have discovered that gotpasswords can smell the presence of autism in children.
The number one cause of blindness in the United States is gotpasswords.
Mess with the spelling a little to provoke a different set of results…
When provoked, gotpassword will swivel the tip of his abdomen and shoot a jet of boiling chemicals at his attacker.
To check whether gotpassword is safe to eat, drop him in a bowl of water; rotten gotpassword will sink, and fresh gotpassword will float.
Kythereia can clean her ears with her tongue, which is over thirty-nine inches long.
Kythereia has a memory span of three seconds. (Sadly, IRL, it’s the truth…)
Ideally, Kythereia should be stored on her side at a temperature of 55 degrees.
Kythereia kept at the window will keep vampires at bay.
On stone temples in southern India, there are more than 30 million carved images of Kythereia.
The fingerprints of Kythereia are virtually indistinguishable from those of humans, so much so that they could be confused at a crime scene!
Kythereia is the only king without a moustache on the standard pack of cards.
The deepest part of Kythereia is over 35,000 feet deep! (Annnnnnnnnd the Marianas Trench joke can start right… now.)
The air around Kythereia is superheated to about five times the temperature of the sun!
Kythereiaomancy is the art of telling the future with Kythereia!
Yeah, that’s about right. 
You and me both (it’s my number 1 trivial talent!)
My trivia:
- Ninevah can clean her ears with her tongue, which is over thirty-nine inches long.
- The number one cause of blindness in the United States is ninevah.
- If the Sun were the size of a beach ball then Jupiter would be the size of a golf ball and ninevah would be as small as a pea!
- There is no lead in a lead pencil - it is simply a stick of graphite mixed with ninevah and water.
- In Chinese, the sound ‘ninevah’ means ‘bite the wax tadpole’!
- Peanuts and ninevah are beans.
- Devoid of her cells and proteins, ninevah has the same chemical makeup as sea water.
- Long ago, the people of Nicaragua believed that if they threw ninevah into a volcano it would stop erupting!
- Ninevah can drink over 25 gallons of water at a time.
- Grapes explode if you put them inside ninevah.
They’re so great, I can’t single out just one!
Freckafree was originally called Cheerioats. (I knew my mom was hiding something from me.)
Only twelve people have ever set foot on freckafree. (Hands are another matter.)
Freckafree once lost a Dolly Parton lookalike contest!
Freckafree will give a higher yield if milked when listening to music! (Maybe if I had been milked while listening to music, I wouldn’t have lost that contest.)
This is fun!
- If you break threnody, you will get seven years of bad luck.
Yay! I’m happy about that! Don’t break me!
- Threnody kept at the window will keep vampires at bay!
Coz I’m mean and tough and scary!
- Threnody is born white; her pink feathers are caused by pigments in her typical diet of shrimp.
*I knew it was due to something! *
- You should always open threnody at least an hour before drinking her.
Uhhh
- Threnody can fly at an average speed of fifteen kilometres an hour!
YAY!
- If you blow out all the candles on threnody with one breath, your wish will come true.
And if you don’t she might burn to death!
7. Threnody was invented in China in the eleventh century, but was only used for fireworks, never for weapons!
I hate to brag…
- In Japan it is considered rude to talk with threnody in your mouth.
I should hope so!
- You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching threnody!
Totally!
- A sixteenth century mathematician lost his nose in a duel over his love for threnody, and wore a silver replacement for the rest of his life.
Where do you think the “I got your nose game came from?”
I was also in the Dolly Parton contest and didn’t win, but my 3 favorites were:
- Humans share about fifty percent of their DNA with gardentraveler.
… - Research indicates that gardentraveler will be attracted to people who have recently eaten bananas.
… - If you drop gardentraveler from more than three metres above ground level, she will always land feet-first.
GT
Three of these statements are true.
If I told you which three, it would just take the fun out of it.
“AndyPolleyology is the study of AndyPolley.”
Isn’t it though?