Toys You Got For Christmas That Disappointed You...

Inspired by this thread.

We’ve all gotten toys for Christmas that we really, really wanted, but once in our hot little hands turned out to be highly overhyped, right? That’s what this thread is for!

I can remember getting the most amazing toy one year, Milky the Cow! It was a plastic cow with working udders. You basically put a little white pill (that came with it) into the udders, then put her head down into her full water trough and pumped her tail. When the head came up, it meant she was full and you could actually milk her!

I think I played with this for about five minutes before I realized it was bogus. That wasn’t milk, man! That was some kind of chalky water! I been had!

What are some of your Christmas toy disappointments?

Sunburst She-Ra doll. It was a She-Ra action figure with a cape that was designed to look like a sunburst, and when she raised her arms, it looked like she had wings.

Only the cape was made so that her arms needed to be spread to the sides. And her arms just went straight up, so the cape bunched and didn’t fit right. That sucked.

Mine was an Oopsie Daisy.

I was so excited that I brought it to school for show and tell the first day back. She broke right there in the classroom never to crawl again :frowning:

When I was 9 my parents separated my dad and us kids went to live my grandparents. The grandparents were disciplinarians (eg ‘I want never gets’, ‘children should be seen and not heard’, etc). That Christmas instead of toys I got a couple of books and 3 pieces of fruit in one of my dad’s socks. Seems funny in retrospect.

A dolls’ house. I think I was about eight when I finally got a dolls’ house, having wanted one for years. It was a huge disappointment. Apart from amassing lots of furniture and moving people around in it, you just can’t do anything with a dolls’ house.

I recall some sort of Disney themed “candy factory” that sounds a lot like the Milky the Cow exeperince.

But it taught me to never trust Disney so it was good for something.

The EZ Bake oven.

Budding young baker that I was, and even though I hadn’t asked for one, I was thrilled to unwrap this on Christmas day! Santa had even brought one of the big old expansion sets that went with it - someone in the other thread mentioned they got the wedding cake expansion; mine was more cakes, cookies, pies, sprinkles, brownies, frosting, plus tiny animal shaped cookie cutters, tiny plastic rolling pins, pie tins, teeny little measuring cups and spoons, and small plastic utensils. Neat-o!

So, I got everything ready, turned on my cool new oven, peeked inside - um. It was a lightbulb. That’s an EZ Bake oven: a box with a lightbulb inside. You slid your little tray under the light and waited an hour or so for that little, teeny cake to bake. The “cakes” would always come out hard as a rock. I would cut back on the time, and end up with cake that was mush in the middle. There just never seemed to be a happy medium. I couldn’t find that magical spot that you could slide that tiny cake out of there, somewhere between soggy mush and crunchy rock. The cookies were small and crunchy, too, but that was okay. It just didn’t make enough of them. It was like waiting an hour for two animal crackers. The brownies were the same as the cake - there was some magical, mystical time that could never quite be achieved.

The fruit pies, however, were pretty good. I remember waiting an hour for my little apple pie. Mmm. That was A-OK.

I remember using up all of my pie mixes, then saving the cookie cutters to cut my mother’s real cookies out, making much more of the little things, and saving my sprinkles and frosting mixes for Mom’s “real” cooking, as well. The cookie, cake, and brownie mixes got thrown into the spare closet, alongside the EZ Bake. It was all thrown out years later during a good closet cleaning, with no regrets.

jayjay The milking cow toy was my brother’s favorite toy. He solved the milk problem in his own way. We went through a lot of extra milk.

Anastasaeon

I was around before EZ Bake was the rage, and they sold a lot of miniature house hold items for kids. I got some aluminum cooking, and baking pans at maybe five years old. I would bring them out everytime somebody baked and a little bit of the cake batter went into my pan. I had cookie cutters in the shapes used for animal cookies. The two stove top pans got used once in a while, but not too often. I never wanted one of those ovens. I held them in contempt. They were alright for the kids that would grow up to make tv dinners, but not for a real cook.

I got a doll house when I was 8, and I loved it to death. My father built it for me, but we bought all the furniture and such. I still have it today.

As far as disappointing gifts, I remember one year I got this electronic gizmo that supposedly let you “program” it to play any sort of game you wanted! Within about 2 hours, I figured out that really all it was was something where you’d fill in dots on paper with a #2 pencil, and it had some sort of reader that could tell which was filled in and what wasn’t. About the most complex thing you could do was a maze game (“oops, you hit a filled-in dot, that’s a wall, turn around!”). I hated it, and made my mother take it back to the store and get me a better present.

Funny… Mine had arms that were out to the sides.

I can’t think of anything for the OP.

The only toys I ever remember being disappointed with were the ones that weren’t age appropriate. I remember thinking they were just too complicated, but if I’d gotten them just a year or two later, they would have been great. The only one I can remember off the top of my head was the candle making kit I got when I seven (which no one ever wanted to help me with). I know there were more, though.

Guinastasia most have gotten the black market version. Santa bought it out of a car trunk.

Guinastasia I believe you. Some number cruncher made production changes, without checking with the engineer I’m sure.

I just remembered that we had Milky the Cow, too! We have a picture of my brother, wearing nothing but a diaper, sitting on the cow’s back. I remember asking my mom for aspirin to put in the cow when we ran out of milk tablets. She said no. :frowning:

I forget what it was called, but it was a kit of 1000 or more dominos and it came with a domino setup kit with a bunch of patterns. Neat idea, it helped you to set up cool domino patterns and watch them fall in sequence.

Until you open the box and realize that the dominos are 3/4" tall, 3/8" wide and 3/16" thick. It was next to impossible to set them up using the patterns, so tippy, and so hard to manipulate with my clunky fingers. I think I used them once.

I only ended up with a dollhouse because I was too scared of department store Santa to actually talk. Santa suggested a dollhouse (store must have had a big stock) and I just nodded. But I played with it a lot. It eventually ended up being the bank when we kids set up our independent country down in the basement. The dollhouse front door made a nifty teller’s window.
And my EZ Bake oven worked fine. My only disappointment there was that Mom wouldn’t buy any more mixes once I ran out of the initial set.
The only toy I can recall being somewhat unhappy with was the Ken doll Olympic ski set. His skis kept coming off and I never could get him to go down the ski jump, he kept falling over the side. Not to mention his lack of certain anatomic features… quite disturbing.

I think I was eleven or twelve, and I saw in the JC Penney’s catalouge the best toy ever: A set of night vision goggles. Oh, I wanted them, so bad. So. Bad. I mean, with night vision goggles, you could spy on people. And…and…see in the dark! Oh, I wanted them.

So I did what any self-respecting petulant child would do: I begged. I pleaded. I put them near the top of my Christmas list, which I had kindly drawn out with the prices of each item and where they could be acquired.

So Christmas comes, and what do I get? A friggin’ pair of binoculars with red lens and a little red light that pops up. I looked back and forth between the binoculars and the catalogue, to insure that I had gotten the right item. Yup. It was the right item alright.

Stupid JC Penney’s.

Does ‘Domino Rally’ ring a bell? 'Cause I think my brother and I got that to fight over one Christmas. You kind of jam them into the patterns on end, right?
I got some age-inappropriate gifts; I was 14 and some great-aunt got me the Heidi books, in a boxed set.
And once my mom got us an Atari game that we couldn’t figure out - till we realized it needed to be played on a color tv and the one we were allowed to use for the Atari was a black & white.

I got duped by Penney’s, too! The only disappointment I can remember was a model TIE fighter from Star Wars. The catalog described how you could push a button and have the TIE fighter EXPLODE as if hit by a blaster. The picture accompanying the description showed a kid holding the model above his head, vrooming around the room. The thing looked HUGE - like at least 12" from wing to wing.

So I did the whole begging and pleading thing… please please please if I get just onnnnnnne gift please let it be this one pleeeeeeeeaaaase?

And Christmas morning, I opened the package I saved for last, because I knew it had to be the totally rad, super-awesome, near-to-life-sized exploding TIE fighter. It was like 5" big. And when you pushed the button to make it “explode” … the wings wobbled. That’s it. They were attached to the model by a little cable that loosened slightly when you hit the button.

Vvvvvvvvrooooooooooommmm, BRzAAPt!! PikKEWW PikKEWWW!!! BOOOSSSHHHT!!!
wibble wibble wibble

So very, very very disappointing.

I loved my dollhouse when I was a kid (I still have it, it’s up in our attic). The only problem is my little sister managed to lose almost all of the little silverwear.