I think I’d scream and run, though I’m not entirely sure since I’ve never been faced with this situation.
Why is everybody yelling “Fire”? Wouldn’t that cause would-be helpers to run away, or at least confuse them about what they are supposed to do?
3 words:
Concealed Weapons Permit
4 words:
I will shoot you
**If he keeps coming at me:
3 more words:
Bang Bang Bang
Oh yeah- I guess I should include that I am only 5’2, so physical overpowering would not be an option.
“He behaves in an intimidating manner, and clearly wants to hurt you. No weapons. He advances toward you and if you don’t do anything his next move will be to grab you with one arm and hit you with the other.”
There are two aspects to fighting, the physical and the psychological. As he acts intimidating in order to cause fear I will be putting on my big “I am so going to enjoy this” smile. This in itself has been an effective deterrent in many confrontations I’ve had as my assailants have stopped in their tracks when the little guy (me) actually looks like he’s happy to have found a playmate… causing doubt is a powerful weapon.
If our new friend doesn’t reconsider his decision that I am an easy target then he will be due for a huge surprise.
Because our misguided friend seems intent on punching me I would target his legs and reduce or completely eliminate his ability to stand. The guy he wanted to punch just won’t be standing still quivering with fear.
Depending on our respective positioning this would mean striking his knees or ankles with a quick follow up to other targets of opportunity. Having your knee dislocated will often distract you from protecting yourself… 
If he does grab me (easier said then done) then I would reverse the hold, block his punches, and strike any targets that are offered, besides the legs I would go for the throat, eyes, nose, solar plex, ears, and one of my favourites… the collar bone.
I have nearly 24 years of teaching / training and quite a bit of real world experience in winning fights.
I can’t think why I would be walking down a dark alley in the first place but if this scenario did occur our friend might become a little phobic of meeting small guys in alleys.
I need a psycho smiley.
I’m surprised no-one has mentioned the offensive and defensive uses of briefcases and bookbags. I have a very handy forty pound backpack/briefcase, very durable. It’s saved me from a mugging once. (I used it to bounce the very stupid mugger off a car twice, then ran for the office door)
Frankly, shift the bag so if he grabs at me, I can give him it instead, and smile like a madman. Get ready to charge through/past him if I can.
If he is close enough, hard kick in the nuts and run away yelling “Fire”.
If he is not close enough for the kick, I’d pull out my money clip, show it to him, and say “Here is all my money.” I would then throw it past him, turn, and run yelling “Fire”. I figure, which would he prefer, a screaming, moneyless guy or quiet money?
If he’s too close, fight dirty - nuts, knees, nose, eyes, throat, etc. while yelling “Fire”.
Avoid eye contact or any show of fear (so as not to hurt his feelings). Then squeak in surprise as he attacks. After that, it’s up to him.
Put on the One Ring™
Oh wait, that’s just a replica. I disbelieve in illusion! I am invisible! You do not see me! I am just an illusion!
Well, if this ever happens to me I just hope that Feynn is somewhere nearby. 
Either that or I might try the suggestion I saw on a talk show once–screaming and flailing your arms and generally acting completely insane. Maybe I could scare the guy away.
If not and he actually grabs me, I think I’d go into complete panic mode and scratch and hit any sensitive areas I could reach-- like the eyes, ears and throat.
Move back gently as his grabbing hand comes in, take a light grip of it with my opposite hand. When the punch comes in move under it taking the grabbing hand with me and twisting with the power generated by a hip rotation in order to force his wrist through about 270 degrees. Carry on moving under the punch and watch the surprise on the other persons face as there wrist breaks and they are thrown into the wall of the alley. Berate myself for ever going down an alley like that during the night time, and not spotting the potential risky person before they were in range of attacking me. Running would be good if I had enough space to be sure he couldn’t grab my turned back, if he wasn’t telegraphing his actions as much as the OP suggests I would still take out the grabbing hand but with a more defensive movement. Unless the attacker was somehow intoxicated, he would expect you to run, so I would run only if their was somewhere within about 50 paces that was lit and likely to be safe, and only if I was confident he could not attack my back as I turned to run. If he had extremely strong looking arms and wrists I might roll into his back leg coming up with a foot in his groin area and then keep running. If the opponent looks completely relaxed and in control, a skilled fighter, I would try and punch hard and fast under the grabbing arm into the side of his ribs, trying to break a rib or two, since the grab is almost certainly a feint by such a skilled person, and I would need to cause damage quickly to have a chance of beating such an opponent.
The question of making a lot of noise would depend on how likely I thought attracting help was over attracting more potential muggers.
I’m going to have to agree with Feynn on this one. Even though someone bigger than me would be hard to find (6’3", 250), I’d still try to bluff my way out of it. I’ve done it before (to a man holding a knife); hopefully I won’t have to do it again.
If bluffing didn’t work, I would have to go with 2trew’s little girl voice option. “eeeeeeeeek!!”
Also, El Marko’s “key in fist” idea is something I do anytime I’m in a dark, scary place. Saw it in some movie once, and it seemed like a good idea. (famous last words)
Fretful Porpentine, I’ve always been taught that people RUN TO cries of “fire” and are more likely to not respond to “RAPE” or “HELP”. Sorry, I don’t have a cite for that. Pretty f*&ked up if you ask me.
If I didn’t have my gun for whatever reason, I’d probably start limping, mumbling to myself try to pee myself, etc. Anything to make him not want to mess with me.
I have been in said situation. For reference, I’m 5’10", 180 pounds. Guy was taller than me, but didn’t outweigh me. In broad daylight, he comes up behind me, grabs a hold of my jacket, and demands I let him have it. My stunned reaction was, “Wha…?” He punched me in the ear. Brain said, “This is serious!” My next instinct was to make a fist with the middle knuckle sticking out and jam it right in his neck. He grabbed his neck, but his other hand wouldn’t let go of my jacket. His armpit was exposed to me, so I hit him there. He fell, and pulled me down using my jacket. Getting back up I managed to kick him in the throat. He lay there gagging as I half-walked, half-trotted away.
So the first thing I’m going to do from now on if I’m accosted is to hit the attacker right in the Adam’s Apple. Its a soft target that nearly no one thinks to protect, and the instinct of losing air will overwhelm even the toughest tough guy.
Given the sketchy scenario, and the motion of the guy to grab/hit me, we would probably end up dancing. That is, I would evade the initial grab while closing. We would probably end up grappling, because my strengths tend toward grappling techniques.
I can’t give a more complete answer because each fight is individual (hand crafted, if you will :D). There wouldn’t be much chance of me running from this situation-that’s not my usual response to the physical threat, as described.
I’m firmly in the ‘Gift of Fear’ camp to avoiding situations like that, but…
I have a blade on me 99% of the time so that would be the first thing I would get in my hand. I probably wouldn’t open it or advertise I have it, but it would be ready in case it looked like the guy had/was going for a weapon. Then I would do one of two things depending on what I thought of first or what the situation was:
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HARD kick to the side of the leg. A modified football punt/thai kick with my shin to the knee or thigh. Then create distance and see if I can run.
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Close the gap with a solid punch or up-elbow to the throat/face. This is a timing thing; as an attacker closes in on you they are timing where their punch will be on a stationary object, maybe one moving away from them. If you close the gap before they expect it, then the punch they have for you won’t have the power behind it, and they won’t be ready to defend your attack. This is where Aikido meets boxing. Then I’d try and create distance and see if I can run.
IF they caught ahold of me and wouldn’t let go, that is when I would probably slice their hand or forearm and then run. Yeah, it escalates it and if I got caught I’d probably be in more trouble than them, but this is a guy in an alley and I can afford good lawyers.
I agree with Feynn about the smiling. I think this is the main reason I haven’t been in a fight outside the ring in over 10 years. I smile at agro guys, and keep walking. They don’t persue it, they generally go onto the next guy and try it on them. Unfortunately my smile is a ruse, whereas I feel Feynn’s is one based on experience and talent I simply do not have.
-Tcat
Duck and kick him as hard as I can in the side of his knee as soon as he is in range. After his knee is dislocated, it should be fairly easy to kill him, or run away. If he had a weapon I’d probably kill him, would love to have an opportunity and an excuse to kill someone. Maybe break his neck.
Wow, I didn’t read the responses before I posted, lots of people going for that dislocated knee. Maybe I better keep an eye out for that low kick next time I’m menacing someone in an alley.
BTW, I’m 6’6" and 320 lbs., I might be freaked out if I was threatened by someone significantly bigger than me!
I’d try to swallow my fear and ask him to step aside in a firm, confident voice. If that didn’t make him think I was a poor choice of victim, I’d turn and run. If he grabbed me from behind, let’s hope it’s around the neck because I actually know what to do then. I’d turn my chin into the crook of his elbow, because it gives room for my windpipe. Then I’d use my foot to kick backwards and scrape down the knee and shin, ending with a stomp on his instep. If he let go of me to double over in pain, I’d try to get one more nut-cracking kick in before hauling ass. If he were utterly down in pain, I think I’d kick him about 40 times, all the while screaming “WHO taught you it’s OKAY to try to HURT PEOPLE? What kind of WEAK pitiful excuse for a human would DO something like that? Is your grandmother PROUD?”
I tend to be the kind of person that upon seeing a dark alley thinks “Oh a dark alley! I wonder where it goes…” so I can easilly (and often do) imagine myself in such a situation. I also fall into the “always have a blade on me” camp for that very reason.
At 5’6" and 140# most other guys are bigger and meaner than me, it’s not too unusual to find people double my weight (including a number of dopers in this thread) and a good foot taller. Any attack from such an opponent is, IMHO, an attack with a deadly weapon. In such a situation I’d immediatly escalate it to a knife fight. I can have my knife (a 4" Benchmade one hander w/pocket clip) out and open about one second after sensing danger. I’d slash at the arm trying to grab me first, hopefully severing a few tendons in the process. If possible I’d break off the engagement at that point and head to safety. If he continued to press his attack I’d keep some distance between us, keeping my knife hand in close to prevent him from taking it, and wait for him to make a move, attacking with the knife again once he was in easy striking distance. Whatever part of his body he exposed during the attack is where I’d try and stab/slash again, even if it meant killing him.
Since this is a dark alley I’m assuming no witnesses, under such circumstances I wouldn’t feel obligated to report the incident to the police. Especially if I left my attacker dead. They ask too many questions and depending on what state I’m in I could end up in more trouble for defending myself than my attacker would’ve been in for assaulting me to begin with.
Of course I’ve never been in a situation like this before so I’m really only guessing how I’d react. For all I know I could end up wetting myself and curling into the fetal position while crying like a little girl at the first sign of danger.
Instep
I’m a 5’8" sphere on tiny little feet. This much weight coming down on an instep WILL break a foot. (Yes, I’ve used it and yes it works)
Even I can waddle faster than he at that point.
If that doesn’t work, and he has no other weapons, I hit the ground and curl up in a ball. There is no way he can move me and I can scream like nobody’s business.
I suppose that if this happens and he manages to hit me - I carry an Epi-Pen and could use that. Just what he needs, more epinephrine, but it should scare the pee out of him.