Traveling for Business: Share Your Stories

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
21

I had an appointment in St. George, Utah (nice town). I could have flown there, but I’d have to change planes in SLC and the airport there is pretty scary (I flew in once.) Las Vegas is quite close, though, so I booked my flight there. We were well into Utah when all of a sudden we started to circle. The pilot announced that GW Bush and Air Force One were flying to Vegas for Bush to give an election year speech at the AARP Annual Convention. We finally started to move toward Vegas and I was OK because I had built in plenty of time cushion. We landed and I got on the bus to the rental car lots. Stop. The Presidential motorcade was passing by. By the time I got in my car, I had about two hours to get to St. George.

I finally get to the state line with about an hour and a half to spare and an hour drive. Then, right behind the state line sign is another one saying “You are entering the Mountain time zone”.

Oops. I really had to scramble to explain that one. I mostly blamed it on Bush.

22

Traveled hundred of times in my career; standard business meetings to long term deployments in war zones. Desert Storm - the good war - I’m at the end of tour around mid-April 1991. Turning in my rental 4x4, a three year old Isuzu Trooper, which has been my “home” for the past 6 months. I’m beat, 18 hour days/7 day weeks/great experience, and I’m not too with it. Dan, our admin. guy asks if I have a government credit card. Today, most government folks have them for travel but back then, it was far more rare and it was Diners Club. The Sheik, our rental car agency owner, was looking to get paid since he’d let out the vehicles with no down payment and had expenses of his own. Dan needs to charge 7 other vehicles. :eek:

Dan: "It’s going to be $31,500.00. What kind of limits on the card?
Me: “No clue.”
D: “Think we’d better call?”
M: “Yes, keep me out of jail, please?”

ring ring ring …

D: “Homefront, Missile Command, just says bring the receipt.”

Over to the Sheik, he whips out the old style charge plate where you run the arm back and forth over the charge card/6-copy carbon receipt pad. He write up a an invoice in Arabic and adds several stamping. Dan adds several stampings of his own, nonsense but he has to keep up appearances. $31,500.00 is added in several spots. And I fly out.

Back in Huntsville, I turn in incomprehensible form and fifth copy of charge card rubbing. Five minutes later, I’m walking out with a check to mail to Diner’s Club. Easy peasy. I’d sleep 12 hours a day for the next couple of weeks.

23

I travel a lot for business. Right now I’m in Ramallah for work. Some years I travel as much as six months out of the year. They all kind of blend together and I’ve woken up in hotel rooms and not has any idea what country I was in or where the light switch is for a couple of minutes, the first time that happens can be panic inducing, but you get used to it.

24

Uptil now the worst thing that happened to me was me arriving in Dubai and my clothes in Djibouti. When I had a business meet next morning. I now know why hotels have shops and why they are so expensive.

A few years ago the George Clooney movie about business travel came out. In it he is having a long term affair with another frequent traveler, an otherwise happily married woman. I was done my a lot of counsultancy work at the time and while affairs and hookups on the don’t happen as much shown in the movies, they happen much more regularly than people imagine. And within the traveling consultants community; not a secret. And information on these tends to stay within the groups.

25

Question- where do you park your RV? I see people parking in Walmarts all the time. do you do that or try to find an RV park?

I wouldnt think either of those would be near major cities like NYC or LA.

26

So far I haven’t had to go to NY, so I don’t know about RV parking there. Like you, I imagine it would be difficult. Most major cities have RV resorts nearby, and most of the cities in the West (my usual destinations) have upscale trailer parks. I’ve found that a lot of high end trailer parks keep a few sites open for transients. If none of the above are available, I just use the nearest State park.

FWIW: Staying with people who live in a city can be more interesting than a hotel with other travelers. Some of the older established parks have a bohemian aspect that makes them fun. As an example (although this was a short trip), I spent a week at the Pecan Grove park in Austin. It was like a little slice of Burning Man with shade trees. I could ride my bike to a lot of the interesting brewpubs and eclectic restaurants. This is an unexpected bonus to being a travel curmudgeon.

27

I was, too, but one place where I worked seemed to delight in screwing us over for travel. Because engineers don’t get overtime, they would schedule us to travel after working hours or on weekends, even if it didn’t make sense. They wouldn’t allow us to pick our own hotels within the allowed rate, instead making us drive unnecessarily far from hotel to meeting site. They were just flat-out surly, and I’m pretty sure there was a policy that travel claims had to sit, untouched, for 3 weeks before being processed. Thankfully, I didn’t have to travel too often while there.

Another place I worked gave us more flexibility, which was nice - you know, being treated like a competent adult. Unfortunately, for one particular trip, I allowed a coworker to make our plans, not realizing he was a major league cheapskate.

First off, rather than booking a non-stop flight, he had us going out of a remote airport and changing airplanes twice to get cheaper tickets - which ended up being negated by the mileage cost to drive to and from the airport as well as the parking fees. No one should have to take off and land 3 times when going from DC to San Francisco - EVER!!!

We were attending a conference at a hotel, but he booked us at a crappy, cheap hotel some miles away that was way below the allowed rate. He insisted on going to a grocery store to get cheese and crackers so we wouldn’t have to spend our per diem on eating out because he saw travel as a money- making opportunity for him.

The conference had a social event the first night and we were all given drink tickets. I don’t drink. He wanted mine so he didn’t have to pay for a second drink. When I had enough of his idiocy, I had to BEG for the rental car keys so I could go get a real meal in a real restaurant.

Needless to say, I never traveled with him again. Moral of the story - never travel with a tightwad!

28

I was in the workforce for 20 years before I started to travel. I liked it, since it let me go places like San Francisco, Atlanta, Toronto, NYC, Las Vegas, and Frederickton, New Brunswick (wonderful city, BTW).

My first trips were to NY and I stayed at the Downtown Athletic Club. Yes, the ones giving the Heisman Trophy, which was in the lobby. It was cheaper for the company (a brokerage) to buy a membership and have its staff stay there than to rent a room in NYC.

My story was when I was going down to NYC via Amtrak. We had reached the Rhinebeck station – about a hour south of Albany – when the train stopped. And stayed. It was a brand new locomotive, and it have failed. So they had to wait until the next train arrived from Albany – about an hour later – and we’d get on that. They gave us vouchers for a free trip.

About an hour later (around 5 pm), the other train arrived. You could see its light on the track behind us. So it sat there. And it sat there. And it sat there.

After about 20 minutes, they told us of the problem. It had been raining. They had to switch the train to another track, and the switch wouldn’t work, shorted out in the rain.

There was a manual switch. It was in a box. With a padlock.

One problem: This was an Amtrak train. But the tracks were owned by Conrail. Only Conrail had the key. And the guy with the key was on his way.

He was expected in an hour.

The passengers offered to take up a collection to buy a bolt cutter and a new padlock, but it couldn’t be done. Amtrak did offer to buy pizza for the entire train, since it was dinner time.

Finally, after an hour, the guy with the key arrived. As did the pizza. When they told us to board the new train, the passengers basically said, “Screw you. We’re getting our pizza!”

29

Another former road warrior checking in. I went from working for a Japanese company flying economy class trans-Pacific four or five times a year to setting up a branch office of an American company there and flying business class; then back to a Japanese company and back into the cattle car. The first transition was much easier than the second.

Everyone thinks international travel is supposed to be fun, but it gets tiring. I also remember waking up in a hotel room and forgetting what country I was in. You go to these conventions: the booths look exactly the same, the international hotels look the same, you talk to the same people and only the restaurants are a little different, sometimes.

One trip which wasn’t particularly fun was a trip to NYC just after Christmas back in about 2012? There was a huge snowstorm and we were diverted to Detroit with absolutely no way of getting to NY for several days. Wound up renting a car and driving when I was completely jet lagged.

Another time, our Delta flight connecting flight from Las Vegas was cancelled, and it was going to take a couple of days to get back to Japan. Instead we took the red-eye to NY and the morning flight to Japan, only losing one day. That was in economy and it was a long day.

30

I’ve done fair amount of traveling, both for Uncle Sam and for civilian employers.

[ul]
[li]It’s always fun to attempt to check into a hotel after a 22hr working/flying day, only to find out that your gov’t travel card has been turned off because the gov’t is months behind on paying travel vouchers. Bonus points when it’s a foreign country and the language barrier is impenetrable by anyone on the crew, and super terrific bonus multiplier when there’s 12 of you in the lobby, in uniform, and you’re in a part of the world that’s not a big fan of the ol’ U.S of A. That was fun.[/li]
[li]It’s always fun to get a phone call from the rental car company, and the person who called you (the same person who rented you the car at the beginning of the month, at the location closest to your home) is glad you answered, because the next phone call she was making was to the police to report the car stolen. Turns out the employer that had promised they would take care of the rental car bill… didn’t.[/li]
[li]It’s always fun to get an unlimited-miles rental car on a long business trip that you actually *like *driving, and some unexpected free time drops into your lap. Road trip![/li]
[li]It’s cool to be able to work a business trip to include a milestone wedding anniversary (which was otherwise going to be spent at home), have the company pay for your hotel room & rental car, sweet-talk the hotel into a significant room upgrade while staying within the company’s hotel cost restriction, and bring your spouse along for a week-long, kid-free anniversary “vacation”.[/li]
[li]It’s always fun to land at Base X late at night after a long working/flying day, offload cargo, put the airplane to bed, check into billeting, then find out every food option on base is closed for the night, and there’s a curfew for off-base travel… and we just missed the cutoff.[/li]
[li]It’s awesome to fly halfway around the globe in one of Uncle Sam’s tankers, and occasionally have 2-3 full days off between flying legs. There’s no other way I would’ve ever seen a glacier or a herd of wild moose in Alaska, toured Gibraltar, Taormina, Ronda, the Tower of London, etc., or been able to roam/snorkel Wake Island for hours and see POW Rock with my own eyes.[/li][/ul]

31

I worked for a great company. Did on the road sales. About 3 nights a month out of town.

The company said eat like you would at home. So, it was steak and wine. Never a problem with the expense report.

Had a company car. And they paid for the car washes. One time I thought the one dollar wax option was a good idea. They said don’t do that again. Oh well.

I stayed at a hotel in Lake Tahoe, NV. In the winter. Checked into the room and it was freezing. Maxed out the thermostat. Looked around the room for a vent. No fan, nothing. Called the desk and they said it was ceiling electric heat. Went out to eat. Came back and the room was toasty. Went to sleep.

Woke up at 3am, sweating, like I was in a sauna. I didn’t turn down the thermostat when I came back from dinner. Stood up, from the bed, and it was worse. I about died. Opened windows and doors and it eventually was bearable.

32

Kill. Me.

My worst work travel stories are:

Driving 2 hours each way to a salt mine in a hellacious blizzard in a rental car with pathetic all season tires. Constantly sliding while slowly crawling along and holding up traffic on tertiary highways and gravel roads. At points I had to basically stop because the road was indistinguishable from the surrounding farmer’s fields due to the snow.
I was the representative for the supplier (my company) of a significant chunk of machinery the salt mine was purchasing, and I was attending a project kickoff meeting hosted by the salt mine on site. We do all of our own commissioning, so when it came time for the customer to ask what we need in terms of 1) Equipment and, 2) manpower, my answers were; 1) None, and 2) Umm, stay out of my guys’ way? After the meeting was done, the customer was like “wow, that was easy,” slapped me on the back and jokingly said, “well at least we got you out of the office for a day, guffaw!”
Another time I spent all night awake trying to get my luggage out of luggage jail. I flew into Atlanta to visit a sister company and my luggage was routed to the wrong carousel. By the time I noticed and found it, it was in a locked office on the other side of a glass door. Me and my coworker called every available customer service line looking for an after-hours contact. We begged cleaners, we got the personal number of a baggage handler who pitied us but couldn’t help. In the end we went to the hotel at about 5AM and returned to the airport at 9AM to pick up our bags. That first day of the trip was a waste.

33

I travel fairly frequently for work, I just happen submitting an expense report right now so I can see that I made 16 trips last year.

I was in Orlando Florida all of last week. The weather in Atlanta on the 22nd delayed and diverted my flight so I didn’t get to my hotel until 2am. I was then in training every day from 8am until at least 6:45pm and often later. I accumulated maybe 10 minutes of exposure to the sun over the course of the week. May as well have been Buffalo, NY.

I refuse to eat at chain restaurants, and let me tell you that Orlando is the ultimate world champion, ne plus ultra, pinnacle of achievement in density of chain restaurants. One night I found myself in a Colombian restaurant in a rough neighborhood with lots of poorly concealed weapons around. One guy ordered a steak and fed it to his pit bull that was sitting in the courtyard. The food was great, though!

I agree with everyone’s sentiment that it isn’t particularly enjoyable. I was in Mexico City three times last year, and if I hadn’t intentionally booked an extra half-day on one trip to visit Chapultapec, I would have seen nothing other than a manufacturing plant and my hotel room, just like every other business trip I make.

34

“So what can I expense?”

“Expense anything you have to pay for on the road that you wouldn’t have to pay for at home.”

“I don’t have to pay for sex at home.”

35

I’ve only had one expense report flagged, and I usually eat pretty well.

The one that was flagged, I was stuck in Louisville, KY after all flights were cancelled. I managed to grab one of the last remaining hotel rooms in the city and went to an upscale chain steakhouse across the street for a meal (yes, I know I said I don’t eat at chains, it was late and they were open and nearby).

I was tired and exhausted and ordered at the bar without even looking at the menu. The bartender listed the steaks and I ordered a NY strip. He asked if I wanted sides, and I ordered the hash browns and creamed spinach.

Time passes, and soon a waitress appears with a massive platter of hash browns and a vat of creamed spinach. Upon questioning, the bartender informs me that sides are served “family-style” and they are in the neighborhood of $20 each. On top of my $60 steak and my multiple $12 glasses of wine and my $15 bourbon manhattan.

36

My absolute all-time best business trip was to the UK in 2007(ish). I booked a Monday to Monday trip, stayed Monday-Thursday night in a (really nice) hotel in Slough, and managed to find a room (also in a really nice hotel, & for the same price as the one in Slough) in downtown London, right off Oxford Street, near Marble Arch for Friday, Saturday & Sunday night. I worked all week then my driver took me to London after work on Friday and I had the whole weekend free to see the sights, drink beer, and wander around. Without a doubt one of the best weekends of my life.

37

Jeff Ruby’s? My coworker and I found that place in Louisville for training at UK. We mentioned it to our boss when we came back, and he took grandbosses there when they went down for training. We all ended up back there a month later, and grandboss HAD to take us to this awesome steakhouse he found the last time he was in town. He was so proud until I pointed out a specific bottle of Barolo that was fantastic, even if a bit underaged. When he asked about the amazing breadth of my wine knowledge, I just responded that it was the one we had gotten the first time we came here. Apparently, when you’re dropping $10k a seat for training, the travel expenses (travel itself booked by the company, corporate card for food/gas/miscellaneous, and no per diem) hardly register notice.

Another time, my boss (immigrant from Mexico) decided to teach me about tequila. We got so smashed that I don’t remember what all I said, but it probably included how much I loved having him for a boss, all the opportunities he’s provided, etc. We didn’t even wait until the last night before we left, oh no - Monday night, with 4 more days of training left. I’m sure I’ve made worse decisions, but I can’t recall them.

38

Traveling on business for 40 years is why I rarely travel by air for pleasure now that I’m retired, and when I do I go first class. While I loved doing it back then, it takes quite a toll on you. I saw a lot of really cool places I never thought I’d see, and it satisfied what I thought was an insatiable wanderlust, so there’s that.

One of the worst trips was with my boss back in about 2003. The office admin assistant was a total waste of skin who spent most of her time on family drama. She booked us on a flight to WDC and put us (#1 & #2 in the company!) in a 2-star hotel. We went out to dinner with a client and the waitress dumped a full glass of red wine down my shirt and into my lap, without so much as an offer of a towel to clean it up. I sat there in a puddle and rode back to the hotel sitting on a plastic garbage bag.

That was all bad enough, but the dimwit had booked us into Washington National Airport, and back out of Dulles without telling us. For those not familiar, they are 30 miles apart and involve negotiating some heavy traffic. The morning of our flight, we took a taxi to National (Reagan). After some confusion and a futile waste of time waiting for our flight to appear on the trip board, I pulled out the tickets and saw that we were at the wrong airport.

We jumped in a taxi, but it was hopeless, and we missed out flight. So the we got in two different lines to get on a next-day flight; I got to the counter first and was given the last first-class ticket on the flight, much to the annoyance of the boss lady.

We go to the bar and she calls the office dimwit and tells her to find us hotel rooms close to the airport. This fool tells her (the fucking CEO, for god’s sake) “Well, why don’t you just have a taxi drive you around to different hotels and find rooms?” The boss blew her stack. A most unpleasant trip, but typical for the short time I worked there.

39

No horror stories for me. I travel maybe twice or thrice a year for business. I once worked for a company that had a site in Beijing, so I got to travel there a couple times within a couple months of each other. In the last couple years for another former company, I did peer reviews in Évreux, France, and in 's-Hertogenbosch, the Netherlands. I’d been to Paris and Amsterdam on vacations before, but the business trips gave me a chance to see stuff I missed the first time around. I saw the WWII historical sites in Normandy, and I saw a great deal of the Netherlands during the weekends before and after the peer reviews.

40

I’ve found that the boss usually wants you to spend plenty, so his receipts don’t look so unreasonable in comparison.