tropicana strawberry melon

I am not a very temperamentful person, so concider this an expression of minor annoyance rather than a flaming pitting.

Today I had lunch at the American food institution Panda Express (their chow mein was tasty, by the way). Among the drinks avaible were the regular soda, water and bottles juice. I opted for the juice, a Tropicana Strawberry Melon.
I had a sip of it and reacted towards its sweetness. It really tastes more like a soft drink than a juice and sure enough, it had corn syrup added to it, though the quantities are not mentioned. The thing here is that I put a lot of value into the word ‘juice’. I know that fast-processed juice that you buy in stores is typically sweetened, but using the juice label should come with a responsibility to ensure that the juice in question really does resemble actual fruit juice. That might be the case for the Tropicana (which tasted fine, in all honesty), but I found the product suspicious.

This is probably the lamest rant you’ve ever read. I’m sorry.

I prefer to call it a “niche” rant. :slight_smile:

I thought Tropicana already fixed this after pressure from a lawsuit. Yep, Tropicana actually go sued over what you’re ranting about. Here’s the story from 2005: Tropicana to Change Labeling of Fruit-Flavored Drinks

Did the bottle actually say “juice”?

The bottle reads Flavored juice drink from concentrate with other natural flavors (yum!). It is labeled in the Panda Express menu as ‘juice’, however, so maybe it is rather the Panda’s fault.

God damned pandas. This is why they are dying out.

Yeah, high fructose corn syrup really is bad stuff. And I mean, you know how much pandas love those damn fruit flavored drinks and processed cheese foods. Silly pandas.

Well now, this sounds like money in the bank for cactus waltz via class action settlements against both Tropicana and Panda Express.

*Dear Mr. waltz

In the aforementioned action in which the party of the second part, hereafter (riiiip) and the party of the fifth part (riiiiiip)…anyway, our lawyers have collected $22,500,000.16 for their part in the action and if you sign on the dotted line below we will send you a cashier’s check for $0.75.


your friends at

Venal, Shyster and Godwin, Attys-At-Law*

Go for it!

The real outrage here is that Panda Express serves no Panda-meat dishes. It’s like going to Pizza Hut and being told they don’t serve pizza.

You really thought you were going to get real melon juice and strawberry juice? Unfortunaely, that’s a bit naieve. Anytime you run across a tuti-fruiti, red and prudey, unholy and unnatural, super energy, combo flavor in a bottle or can-- chances are it is a mix of a neutral fruit juice from concentrate, like Apple or in Tropicana’s case, Pear juice, plus natural and artificial flavors, preservatives, and stabilizers. That’s modern food science.

There were probably other juice types available at the Panda, weren’t there? Tropicana Orange Juice and Apple Juice are pretty safe bets if you prefer your juice unadulterated. Chances are the Panda Express labels all of their juice and juice-drinks as juice on the menu because they are all the same price…

It’s finger Ling-Ling good!

I hate it when they put high-fructose corn syrup in my panda juice.

I am sure it was naive, but I learned my lesson. Though, it’s not like two fruit juices cannot be mixed without a handful of syrup. And the only other time I tried to get juice at a fast-food restaurant here in the United States was when I ordered orange juice at McDonald’s, and then I was served non-suspicious orange juice from Minute Maiden. Naturally, I thought the juice sortiment was a solid thing with fast food restaurants, in the cases that it’s avaible (though I almost only see variations of soda pop).

I didn’t anticipate the panda effect.

No, if you want finger Ling-Ling, you pay more.

My guess is that Minute Maid is owned by Coca-Cola, the same as Tropicana is owned by Pepsi. McDonald’s serves Coke products and my bet is that Panda serves Pepsi products. The juice from McDonalds is 100% real and served from the fountain.

Speaking of McDonald’s, I tried one of their regular sized Hazelnut Iced Coffees for the first time and went back the next day for a large. Now, everytime I pass a McDonald’s I get a craving for one. That should be illegal.

Those things really are good. Even now, with the weather below freezing and sleet falling from the sky, I still crave one whenever I walk past McD’s. If they made them hot I’d probably have one every day.

Seems appropriate.

Strawberry juice and melon juice are very expensive by themselves, which is why almost any time you see them, they will usually have an apple or pear juice base, as **devilsknew ** said above. Even when you go to a smoothie or ice cream place and ask for a strawberry smoothie, they’ll usually add apple or even orange juice to take up space.

But have you tried Burger King’s BK Mocha Joe (or whatever it’s called)? Dude. It’s crazy good.

You should be illegal… You are a HOT Hazel Nut Coffee. Delicious, you are. I always order a hazlenut syrupy, sweet, beautiful espresso, if I chance a coffee house. Your complexion is butternut, coffee, and cream. so HOT.

:: blinks stupidly :: Oh. Hah. Indeed.

Ooh, I love it when you talk dirty. I bet you say that to all the hot beverages, though.