True revenge of the geeks stories

In My Humble Opinion
1

I was reading the letters at www.patheticgeekstories.com (a great site, by the way), and one letter was from a guy who finally stood up to a bully. Apparently, they had gotten into a fight in the cloak room.

The author said that the outcome was much different from TV and movies. He was not treated with respect afterwards, but was avoided like the plague for being the crazy kid that jumps other people in the cloak room.

Being weaned at Hollywood’s pacifying teat, I love happy endings. I hope that others might have stories where the geeks triumphed over adversity, whether it be the popular kids, antagonizing teacher, or over-protective parents.

I do have one story. Not about me, though. I was a geek, but the kind who was generally ignored. People were friendly to me, but my horrible shyness stopped me from making many friends. There was one girl in my class who did have her own revenge, after a fashion.

She was a plump girl, and not particularly attractive. She was nice enough, but also very poor, making her the target of many bullies. It didn’t help matters that a story (most likely apocryphal) was making the rounds that she had used a frozen hotdog as a dildo during a slumber party, and that it had broken off inside her.

Some of the rowdy bunch in my senior class nominated her for homecoming queen, amid many hoots and hollers. At our high school, each class would nominate four people of each gender for homecoming royalty. The entire school would vote, and the winners would be announced in front of an all school assembly. Each class’s nominees would take the stage, with the freshman class’s eight candidates going first. The winners would be announced, then much high-fiving and hugging, and then the next group of candidates would take the stage, and the process would start again.

I was on pins and needles when this girl finally took the stage, arm in arm with one of my classes more popular (and sincerely nice) guys. Everyone knew that it was a horrible joke. A particular vicious group of girls was actively campaigning for the poor girl, laughing all the while. Had none of these people ever seen “Carrie”?

Even her friends were making fun of her, saying that she never should have been nominated.

During the assembly, however, she took everyone by surprise. She handled herself with dignity and grace. And, she looked stunning. Each candidate was announced, and there were no hoots and hollers when her name was read this time.

She didn’t win. But neither was she relentlessly teased anymore. After the assembly, it seemed as if most people saw her in a different light. A group of the more popular girls took her under their wing. She seemed genuinely happy afterward, even landing herself a boyfriend with a cool car (I can’t remember what he looked like, or even his name, but he had a kick ass Barracuda).

Not a great story, but one I still think about from time to time.

Anyone else?

2

There was a older guy who made my life hell in grade school. He was a year or two ahead of me and relentlessly harrassed me. Never could figure out why. Guy was a real dick. He eventually went to high school and the plague was lifted.

Anyway, fast forward about 10 years. I had a job in the summers at the coolest nightclub in town. I served dinners in the joint till 10 pm then hung out there drinking and partying till the wee hours. One night, this clown shows up and recognizes me and starts to act all “buddy-buddy” like we were long lost pals or something. I hated this dick! He was there with a girl that I had worked with before and “dated” :wink: once. They sit at my table and he is just carrying on like we are the best of friends. The girl gets up to go to the bathroom and he confides in me, telling me, “Oh, man! I am SO in love with this girl! I really think she’s the ONE! BLAH, BLAH, BLAH…” :rolleyes:

A little later, he gets up to go to the bar for a round of drinks. I turn to the girl, and tell her about what a jerk this guy is and how he made my life a living hell and asked her if she had as good a time together as I did the last time I saw her and if she wanted to bail out of there RIGHT THAT SECOND and do it again?

She said, “Yeah! Lets go!”

One of the best rolls I’ve ever had! :smiley:

3

Eh, not a great revenge story, but one of my smoother moments as a 14 year old.

Which isn’t saying much.

I did Outward Bound when I was fourteen with a motley group of kids. Some were great, motivated and decent folk; others were assholes. Because I was really good with the maps and because I used big words a lot, the assholes took to calling me IBM.

At some point were were lost on a mountain and all had our maps out trying to figure out from the terrain where we were. I didn’t like what I’d heard, so I said, “Well, here’s my hypothesis.”

One of the other kids interrupted me, laughing and shouting, “Hypothesis! IBM has a ‘hypothesis’! Let’s here your ‘hypothesis’, IBM!” and so forth.

Normally I just took the mocking, but I was tired, so I turned to him and said, very solemnly, “Look. You can make fun of me, and that’s fine, but I’d like you to answer one question. What’s so great about being stupid.”

Everyone stopped laughing, thought about it, thought about how it was me and not the asshole who was probably gonna get them to the campsite that night. And they didn’t call me IBM again.

('Course, later in the trip they threatened to kill me and stuff my body in a backpack if I didn’t quit arguing with them, but that’s another story).

Daniel

4

One of my friends in junior high (all-boys Catholic school) was very quiet and shy, with a perpetual sleepy-eyed look on his face. Some of the guys decided that he looked just a tad too feminine and began to taunt him on a regular basis (you will find NO more homophobic place than an all-boys Catholic school). His particular nemesis was a football player named Frank, who enjoyed (among other things) stealing Steve’s milk during lunch. One day Steve got fed up with it all and had a word with his dad, who happened to be the chemistry teacher there at school. The dad provided him with a perfect solution.

The next day during lunch, Steve pulled out a small bottle of liquid his father had given him and surreptitiously poured it into his own carton of milk. A few minutes later, as expected, Frank passed by, grabbed Steve’s milk off of the table, drank the whole thing, and then casually tossed the empty carton onto the table. Steve’s face was, as always, a mask. He didn’t even smile.

Our class had P.E. near the end of the day. After getting dressed out, Frank headed over to the “trough” urinal and began to relieve himself. A moment later we heard him shriek in pure, unadulterated horror. “OH MY GOD, MY PISS IS BLUE!!” A bunch of us ran over to investigate and found Frank staring down at himself, thoroughly splattered with his own urine, which was undeniably blue in color. We theorized that he must have let go of himself in the moment of panic, while forgetting to, um, shut off the flow. Frank was pretty close to panic, standing there and looking at his shirt, his hands, and the traces of blue on the urinal and the bathroom walls. He was babbling something incoherently, not even noticing that his shorts and briefs had sunk to the floor.

One of the coaches come in to investigate the noise and had a very difficult time trying not to laugh as he gently restored Frank to a somewhat normal emotional state. As soon as Frank had pulled his pants back up and the coach had led him off to visit the nurse, we heard a click from the toilet stall nearest the urinal. The door opened, and out stepped Steve. With a tape recorder. He was smiling now.

Nobody ever messed with Steve again.

5

Revenge my style:

Ever see the Far Side cartoon named “Shark nerds run the projector” and there’s a shark with glasses? That was me. Probably still is.

I was “back home” a few months ago, and found out where some of the bullies of my childhood were. In no particular order, they wound up stocking shelves at Kmart, assistant night supervisor at McDonalds and in jail.

GEEK - It used to be a four-letter word. Now it’s a six-figure word. :cool:

6

First off, I didn’t know that Pathetic Geek Stories had a website now! I am so happy.

Second, my small “victory” story:
When I was a sophomore in high school I had two classes, Geometry and Biology, with a guy who harassed me every day. He tried to take my bio homework and copy it every day, and when I wouldn’t let him, he whined about how he wouldn’t make the All-State football team if he failed. Too bad, bub, do your own freaking work.
The majority of the harassment was sexual, though, and as I’d already been through one sexual abuse situation in that school that was ignored by the admin, I was afraid that if I told them about this guy, they’d ignore it too, and things would get worse for me. So, one day in Geometry, this guy leaned over and asked me to meet him somewhere at lunch so I could suck his dick. Romantic, no? I told him to fuck off and he kept on and kept on, so finally I told him “Okay, meet me in the girl’s gym at lunch and I’ll do it.”
Lunchtime came and I went off to lunch with my friends like I usually did.
The next day in Geometry, he told me “Angela, I waited for you in the gym at lunch and you never showed up, what’s up?”
I feigned surprise and said “Oh my gosh, I completely forgot! Meet me today, I will be there for sure!”
Lunchtime came, and I went off to lunch with my friends again.
I think this kept up for a few days before he finally realized that I wasn’t going to show up. His comment to me, upon realization? “Fuck you. You’re a slut anyway.”
:rolleyes:

And yes, I know it’s hard to believe, but he really was that dumb.

7

Isn’t it great? I used to read it every week in the Onion, right before I read Dan Savage’s column. The Onion doesn’t even carry it anymore.

Great stories, all!

8

I first discovered it in the Charleston City Paper when we lived there, and when we moved, I took to reading it on the Onion, but always wished that it had a separate site with an archive.

9

True Revenge of the Geeks Story?

Microsoft. :slight_smile:

10

The best revenge is living well.

Tonight the Mrs. and I will slip out of the master bedroom suite at Stately Mercotan Manor and onto the deck overlooking the beach and the lake. We’ll hop into the hot tub and listen to the waves crash about 50 yards from us, and watch for shooting stars overhead. Then we’ll go to bed.

Tomorrow I’ll give two presentations to about 30 of my fellow physicians about how they should be practicing in our clinical setting and why it will give our patients better care. Mrs. Mercotan will continue organizing the Talent Show for the 1st-8th graders set for this weekend, while raising money for our most inportant charity. Then I’ll pick up our youngest from her voice lesson.

And this weekend, I’ll be taking my in-laws to prison!

It just doesn’t get any better than this!! :smiley: :smiley: :smiley:

11

When I was in HS, I was under the average height for my age group and rather portly for my height. In my junior year, the big guys stopped beating me up. I didn’t realize it at the time, but since I’d grown so much the previous year, I was one of the “big guys”, only I hadn’t noticed.

<Fast Forward>
I had been out of HS for about a year and was studying to become a civil engineer in College. The fencing class I wanted to take was full, so I took weight training instead. I was now 6’ tall, 180 pounds of fairly buff guy. Still had the short, fat body image, but WTH.

One day I walked into a clothing store and the clerk there was this guy about a half-head shorter than me, who looked vaguely, but insistently familiar. He also seemed unaccountably nervous in my presence. He helped me find the pants I was looking for and that’s when I finally recognized the guy: Bart Shake*.
“Hey, Bart! Remember me from High School? Sure you do! Remember how you guys used to always beat me up? Ha! Glad to see ya! Thanks for helping me find those pants.”

It wasn’t until I was starting my car in the parking lot that it occurred to me why “Bart” was acting so funny. The last time I saw him (up close, anyway) he was taller than me and all muscle (yes, probably between the ears, too). He recognized me as the punching bag he’d used in HS, and expected this bigger, buffer me to hand him his head! For four years I had been terrified of this guy. This time he was terrified of me. It was a better revenge than just beating him up, and it was entirely unintentional. I could enjoy the irony of the situation without any guilt whatsoever. Occasionally I still do. :cool:

–SSgtBaloo

*Not his real name.

12

I wasn’t a geek, but my best friend at the time was. (Elementary school, btw)
There was this kid named Jim. He was big for his age. About a foot and a bit bigger that me and around 230lbs (fat not muscle). Anyway he would pick on my friend and just generally be an jerk to him. Then one day he started slamming my friend into the lockers full force while his lackeys laughed. This went on for a while, sometimes with me around and sometimes not. My friend became more of a recluse.
Soon I got sick of it. I waited for Jim to do it again and when he did I came up behind him and shoved him into the lockers
Keep in mind I was at least 120lbs smaller than this guy. But I held my ground. So he shoved me back. And I returned the favor.
At this point, Jim’s friends began to laugh at him. And Jim’s eyes tear up. He half heartedly shoved me and ran off.
That as far as I know was the end of it.
Jim, the last time I saw him wasn’t a bad guy. He has a lot of problems though. Most of his friends think he could get drunk and kill himself at any moment. Makes me feel bad looking back on it that no one saw that Jim was just acting out because he really needed someone to pay attention to him. A lot of bad things were happening for him. So, it was kind of a hollow victory for the geeks.

13

It was a short but very pleasant exchange.

In elementary scholl, I had a very unpleasant teacher “teaching” woodshop, a skill my school considered highly important for some reason.

This was the kind of teacher who’d fire off his instructions as fast as possible and then divide his attention between borderline-flirting with the prettiest (7th grade!!) girls and “coach” the three people who could do woodwork on their own. For the rest of the class, he had sarcastic comments on our ineptitude and how we were wasting perfectly good materials. Probably turned me off doing anything practical for a good 10 years. Nothing personal, just an arsehole making clear that until I somehow magically developed a talent for his subject, he wasn’t going to waste time on me - except for a bit of ridicule when he could make a humorous example of me. At the time, I of course couldn’t analyze the situation except that I knew instinctively that an idiot in authority was being unfair. (He was also the teacher who volunteered to do without morning assembly because it was more fun to write up latecomers. Nice guy.)

As it happens, about 15 years later, we met in the hallway of an IT school during a break in evening classes. He recognized me, said hello as if we were long lost buddies and then described his courseload, the (in his opinion) incredibly advanced modules he was taking and how he was just a few classes away from a degree. He then went on to praise my decision to gain IT skills and asked: “What classes are you taking ?” I think I managed to absolutely keep my pokerface and sound almost bored as I replied:“None. I’m teaching Advanced Data Communication & Transmission this semester- you may want to enroll once you get your degree.” :smiley:

14

My revenge of the pathetic geek story is, well, kinda pathetic.

I was just the world’s easiest target through school, and the few friends I had were just as hopelessly geeky as I was. There was a group of cheerleaders and football players (no, really, they were) who seemed to live to make us miserable. And of course I was a late bloomer, and when I left high school I was still pudgy, had a mouthful of braces and coke-bottle glasses. Shortly after high school, I blossomed a bit and was working in a very trendy singles bar. One night two of my erstwhile tormenters tried to get in without ID, and while they were trying to sweet-talk the bouncer, one of them spotted me and did the “long-lost pal” thing, trying to get me to vouch for their age. I got entirely too much pleasure out of telling the bouncer I had no idea who these girls were, and will admit that I crowed to myself as they were unceremoniously shown the door. Woohoo.

15

Man, after seeing some of these stories I wish I’d been tormented more as a young geek, rather than just semi-ostracized.

Okay, no, I don’t, really.

Don’t know how I avoided the torment … I’m as geeky as they come, and I went to highschool in red-neck central.

16

We had a girl in elementary school who was an albino. She had white hair and eyebrows, pale grey eyes, and translucent skin. Plus, her mother made her wear only the palest clothes and transparent plastic glasses. The effect was that she was a ghost.
She was teased mercilessly and shunned. Then one Valentine’s day everyone in the class swapped cards and she got none. She said she was sick and went to see the nurse. The nurse sent her back and eventually the story came out she was too ashamed to face the others. The teacher made a speech and said nobody had to be her friend, but if they wanted to keep the card that she had given each one, then they had to give a card in return. Some threw her cards on the floor, but others picked them up and gave them to her and apologized for being mean and said they wanted to be friends. The next week, when she was composed, the teacher had her say a few words about her condition. She never got flak that year after that.

17

Living well is the best revenge.

Last time I visited my home town I saw one of the guys who made my school days a living hell – selling women’s shoes at the mall.

Visions of Al Bundy …

18

This is my husband’s story. He was a “stocky” kid, wide frame and some extra weight. As he went through school, he gained more weight, to the point where he was a “fat kid,” plus he was pretty short too. Other guys would pick on him for it. Over one summer (I think it was between freshman and sophomore years, he said) - he had a huge growth spurt, at least 10 inches. That amount of weight on his approximately 6-foot-tall frame didn’t look “fat” any longer, plus he was exercising too and toned up some - still looked like he had extra pounds but not like a short blob any longer.

At the start of that next school year, he was outside the building, and one of his tormentors - a fairly popular guy - walked up to him and did a very friendly “you must be new here” introduction. My now-husband said, “You don’t remember me, do you,” and after enjoying the blank can’t-remember reaction, he “introduced” himself to his stunned former tormentor.

Then he picked the jerk up and dumped him into the nearest bush. :smiley: His days of being picked on for being the short fat kid ended.

19

Here is my triumph of the geek story:

In 9th grade, for some reason… I don’t know why… this one kid, Eric, just decided to start picking on me in gym class. Now Eric was easily 3 or 4 inches shorter than me, but that made no difference to him. For some reason he decided I was a nerd and that he was going to start calling me names and harrassing me. I absolutely hated it because I didn’t know how to deal with it. My self esteem was in the toilet because of this. I tried taunting him back by calling him, “Shorty”, on the advice of my dad, but it didn’t work. Eric kept it up, and it got worse.

Other things started happening, coincidentally… like coming into the gym locker room and finding my gym clothes with somone’s nose snot all over them. Nobody ever admitted to doing that, but I know it was Eric. Of course the longer the taunting, teasing and harrasing went on the worse it got, even to the point of him picking a fight with me in the locker room for no apparent reason.

Things changed one Friday evening when I had a school concert. Eric was in Band and played the trumpet. I was in Orchestra and played Cello. This was a concert where both the band and orchestra were slated to perform, so both groups were backstage getting ready at the same time. Here I was in my school-provided suit getting ready to perform and I run across Eric. He also is in his school-provided suit. He looked at me and said, “You look good.”

That was all that was said, but I knew that his perception of me had changed. In that instant he must have realized that there was no reason to pick on me… probably because we had something in common. I said, “Thanks,” and continued to get ready for the performance.

That weekend my dad had asked me about the situation with Eric. I told him that I thought it wasn’t a problem any more and explained what happened before the school concert.

The following Monday in gym class, Eric apologized to me. I could have really ripped into him and gotten all mad and everything, but when he said, “Dragwyr, I just wanted to let you know that I’m sorry.” I could see he was truely sorry for what he had been doing to me. So I forgave him and eventhough we never became friends, I had no problems from him after that.

Not really a revenge of the nerd story, more like a story where the geek earns some respect for a change.

20

This one’s straight out of a movie.

I think I was a senior, so I didn’t know the kid, but his name was Pete he was a freshman and a real geek—think John Stevens from American Idol. He was really sweet though, and really smart, but some of the older kids would pick on him. There was one in particular, Derek, that took extreme pleasure in taunting the poor kid. He’d run into him in the hallway, knock his books out of his hands, tease him about his red hair or his glasses, etc.

Well one day Derek was picking on Pete in the hallway and evidently Pete was prepared. He turned around and punched Derek in the eye, knocking him out, and shocking everyone who saw what happened. By the end of the day everyone in school had heard what happened and Pete became something of a school hero. It was beautiful.

I think they have a plaque hanging on the wall in rememberance. haha j/k.