TSDMB Enemies List

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
101

Vince is the marketing genius that developed the WWF and is currently proposing the WWXFL which will be the side show equivalent of the NFL for dummies. I’d second him for the list but someone will do a flying what’sie off the ropes and crush all my bones. A few days ago Vince announced the prospect of the WWXFL to Wall Street. The reaction from Wall Street was to downgrade his stock. Vince was whapping mad and went on CNBC and publicly stated that Wall Street could “kiss my ass”. The upshot was Vince got about 45 seconds of free air time to promote the WWXFL.

Second on the Taliban.

Go easy on Lyndon Larouche. After all, several years ago one plank to his presidential campaign was to house government in outer space and the credit card fraud is, well, everyone does it.

102

Well, in his first interview, Ventura played off the Tailhook scandel as no big deal-- that sexual harassment was perfectly acceptable under those conditions. And then, here’s his paranoia in the latest Playboy interview, along with some Picasso bashing:

Charming.

–John

103

Since this is my first post, I may as well make it controversial. Hopefully I won’t get run out of here before I post again.

Here are the folks that I believe don’t belong on the enemies list:

Howard stern - Many of you are more like Howard than you’re willing to admit. Lambasting self-important celebrities, frank discussions of sexuality, raunchy humor. Um, not like I listen to him or anything.

WB channel - Hey, Voyager is a good show. Dilbert isn’t bad either. If you’re going to pick on a network, pick on Fox.

Marilyn vos Savant - We’re all on the same team here. It’s not as if she’s advocating astrology or any other pseudo-science.

Martha Stewart - Don’t blame Martha because she’s perfect and your house or apartment looks like it’s been ransacked.

Slim Fast - They never imply loosing weight is easy. The packaging literature explicitly says you should exercise 30 minutes per day and eat “sensibly.” For me it’s a quick breakfast so I can wake up at 8:30 and be at work by 9:00.

Unknown who dreamed up the term “infomercial” - The original infomercials tried to make gullible viewers believe that they were “real” talk or science shows. The term “infomercial” makes it pretty clear that you’re watching an extended commercial.

Steve Case, Bill Gates - Yes, we all hate successful monolithic American corporations and their leaders. Give me a break. Gates does use unscrupulous business practices but does he in any way promote ignorance?

Judge Judy - She is pretty condescending, but only to the litigants who deserve it (unlike her husband who is condescending to everyone).

Trey Parker and Matt Stone - I assume you prefer the saccharine Rugrats over South Park?
My own pick: Sheriff John Bunnell, the host of almost all of Fox’s cheap, sleazy reality shows. I only pick on him because he’s more visible than some anonymous Fox executive.

No sig yet.

104

Okay, Pete Knight is a California State Senator (R-Palmdale) who has sponsored one of those DOMAs, which will be voted on on March 7. The things is, his own son is gay, as was his brother, who died of AIDS. His son has written an editorial for the LA Times condemning his father for acting out unreasonably due to his own fears and, like I said, inability to deal with his family situation. In case you need more proof, let me quote something from the ACLU:

“In 1993, Knight circulated a poem to legislative colleagues that the LA Times described as ‘racist,’ ‘reprehensible,’ and a gross affront to Latinos in general.’ The poem included some insulting lines as, ‘We have a hobby, it’s called breeding, welfare pay for baby feeding’ and ‘We think America damn good place; Too damn good for white man race.’
Despite the uproar it caused, Knight told the LA Times he thought the poem was ‘interesting, clever, and funny,’ and he was surprised anyone would be offended by it.’”

How’s that? Does he make the list?

~Harborina

“This is my sandbox. I’m not allowed to go in the deep end. That’s where I saw the leprechauns.”

105

Again, getting personal opinions mixed up in the matter. South Park is great social parody. If you don’t like it, well then nuts to you.

As far as Yue Han’s Ventura quotes the only thing that would concern me is the Tailhook thing. So what if he doesn’t like religion or art? I will, however, withdraw my opposition to adding his name for blowing off Tailhook. 'tis only fair I guess.

“I’m not done and I won’t be 'till my head falls off.”
–TMBG

106

Bara, you are out of your farking mind.

This is the Straight Dope. We fight ignorance here.

Don’t be a yutz. That is, unless you want to be taunted, mocked and derided.

107

Are you having an anti-Fox problem?

I have a hobby. I have the world’s largest collection of seashells. I keep it scattered on beaches all over the world. Maybe you’ve seen some of it.

108

Bara, not everybody who’s nominated makes the list; some of the people you name aren’t actually OTL, like Parker and Stone.

However, almost any network is a worthy enemy as a promoter of ignorance. Just the nightly news is (I think purposely and sensationalistically) misleading enough on a regular basis for that, not to mention various other pandering specials and series - “When Bunnies Attack” or the like. Even if Dilbert is a good show, we can be sure the WB is guilty of something. If that seems unfair, well, this is an enemies list (Bum bum BUUUUUMMMMMMM!)

Marilyn vos Savant is OTL in a rather tongue-in-cheek way, for her perceived attempt to usurp the title of “world’s smartest human” from Cecil. No enemies list is complete without at least one heretic.

I may have been thinking of one of the other diet gangs when I wrote Slim Fast. I’ve heard one advertise, literally “lose weight without diet or exercise”. They weren’t selling liposuction. I suppose they could have meant “without diet or without exercise”, in which case they would have been safe on a technicality. At any rate, the diet industry certainly needs a representative, and Slim Fast will be it until a better nominee is suggested.

Say no more. He’s ON THE LIST.

109

I would have listed the FOX network, but the Simpsons saved them. Plus, I really like that Malcolm in the Middle show so far.

Are you people denying that “South Park” promotes ignorance? Have you ever seen the show? It’s PURE IGNORANCE. And, as if the show alone didn’t qualify Mssrs. Parker and Stone for the List, Baseketball certainly would.

“History will be kind to me, for I intend to write it.” -Winston Churchill

110

I nominate Richard M. Nixon, just for the irony of putting him on an enemies list.

111

Yeah, and in that vein, I nominate Sen. Joseph McCarthy. Are we allowed to nominate dead people?

~Harborina

“This is my sandbox. I’m not allowed to go in the deep end. That’s where I saw the leprechauns.”

112

No, it’s a show that pokes fun at ignorant people. It’s just that some dumbasses can’t tell the difference and they get all miffed about it. Oh well…

In the manned space program’s early days, NASA spent $1 million
to develop a pen that wrote upside down. The Russians used a pencil.

113

So, recap, who’s ON THE LIST now?

114

To Baraqiyal: I don’t care for the Rugrats (saccharine), nor for South Park (vitriol).

115

Yeah, so was Beavis and Butthead, right? These are shows by the ignorant, for the ignorant. You may watch it and laugh because you think they’re making fun of someone else, but guess what…

“History will be kind to me, for I intend to write it.” -Winston Churchill

116

I nominate Karen P. for telling me I could not paint a picture of Noah with a red robe because they didnt have colors back then. Her proof? Didnt I see Charlton Heston in The Ten Commandments? It was in black and white.

She also insists that the tennis match that the Queen of England keeps showing up at and that Johnny Carson cant resist is played in a small town just outside of Dallas.
When Mother Nature needs a little help call for …

Darwins Elf

117

and another thing…

How about nominating Slim Fast for hiring Monica Lewinsky as a spokesperson.

Like I’d put something in my mouth because she says it tastes good!!!

Queen of Maroons

118

Jenny Craig hired Monica Lewinsky.

119

Voyager is on UPN.

She isn’t perfect, she just thinks she is. I hear her next book is going to be called How to Be As Perfect As Me.

But welcome to The Straight Dope. This is not meant as a personal attack. That’s an interesting UserName. What does it mean?

>< DARWIN >
__L___L

120

How about the Rev. Al Sharpton for his part in the Tawanda Brawley debacle?

And Johnny Cochran?