That is my thought, we regularly go to 3, one in Henrietta NY, one in Lisbon CT and one in WIllimantic CT, and they all seem to have good produce.
My bitch is so many of their products have palm oil as the shortening in them, which I am allergic to - and is not any better for you than any other form of vegetable oil …
I got it off of a facebook meme someone posted about 2 years ago, that is why we named our cat Tiny Apex Predator =)
Is it to much to ask that if you know you’re going to mow today, and you hear Fred across the street crank up his mower, go out and mow at the same time? Instead of this bullshit 30 minutes of quiet after Fred is done…then you decide “Welp, may as well start!”
It’s been nothing but on / off mowing since about 11am.
I, too, planned on yard work, but instead have spent the day with a miserable headache.
This is super neurotic and stupid. I’m aware.
I have, and have had for quite a long time (like, since my age was in single digits), only two modes when it comes to food. The first is that I eat whatever I like and entirely and very deliberately ignore any and all associated numbers, including calories, vitamins, and my own weight. I get exercise over the course of the day, but never work out “on purpose.” And, naturally, I get fat.
That’s because the only other mode is absolute obsession and restriction to the point of starvation. Sometimes, that includes a huge focus on exercise and sometimes, it’s mostly just denial of food. There is no in between. Trying to be a little careful and smart about what I eat has inevitably led to obsession-ville. Getting more exercise but deciding from the start that I am NOT going to calorie-count? Cool, for five minutes, and then… I mean, I can’t eat before I run, right? And if I run/go to the gym in the morning and walk or bike to and from work (not an option currently for several reasons, but it was once upon a time), then it would be straight-up stupid to completely ruin all that by eating a doughnut or getting takeout for lunch or whatever, right? And then one day I realize I know I’ve eaten X and Y and happen to know how many calories they have and I know my workout was LMNOP and maybe part of that was at the gym, where the machines tell you how many calories you’ve burned, soooo…
You know, everyone always says disordered eating never leaves you, but it’s been a minute for me. No counting, no workouts, stupid stuff I used to never dream of like… frappuccinos. But like I said… it was very deliberate. Stick my fingers in my ears and lalalalalala… lalalala I don’t care if I’m fat lalalalalalala my value has nothing to do with my size and shape lalalalalala it’s not like I’m worth anything anyway so who gives a fuck lalalalalalala it’s just a number lalalalalalala there are more important things lalalalalala you need nutrition if you’re going to have a chance at getting your life back lalalalalala your cats love you anyway lalalala.
And now, here I am. I don’t even know what to call this. Basically- I have no appetite. It’s not deliberate. I’m not counting. I have no intention of counting. I didn’t at any point set out to restrict or diet. But it’s… not much appetite, but lots and lots and lots of baggage in both directions. And a body that is trying to do a lot of healing. So like… I’ve lost about 50 lb, according to my medical app/record. So suddenly, I’m super conscious of it again. I mean, I could absolutely afford to lose that and can afford to lose more. So sometimes, it’s that I have every intention of eating something and then I’ve got it in front of me and… ugh. Suddenly I hate peanut butter sandwich and also feel like I’ve just eaten nine of them and can’t possibly choke down another. And sometimes, I’m looking at my options and… I think I could handle noodles in some form and have one 200-calorie noodle soup and one 500-calorie noodle cup and that’s what the choice comes down to. Even though it’s the only thing I’ll eat that day and I am intellectually aware that eating 500 calories in a day is not going to make me fat and is actually much more likely to, again, help me heal… which is what will allow me to have a run/hike/ice skate/work/maybe actually contribute something to the world/walk a dog/bike/etc sort of life, so like… if losing/not gaining weight really is a top priority to me (which it isn’t), then my long-term strategy should not involve restricting right now.
This is so hard to explain- how in some ways, it feels out of my control. And in some ways, it’s all about control. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve told myself I need to eat, made a plan for it, and then just can’t handle it once it’s in front of me. How I don’t want to be this way and I know I’m the only one who has any control over it, but I just… can’t.
I have a few “safe” foods. Cottage cheese and most raw fresh fruit/veg are okay most of the time. Eggs are okay sometimes. Toast is okay sometimes. Separate from the eggs, though. And all of that is complicated further by the fact that I get my groceries by delivery, which is a) expensive, so I get them as seldom as I can b) very unpredictable in terms of quality and availability, especially when it comes to produce c) sometimes booked up and not available at all.
I don’t think I’ve really explained it well, but I don’t think it’s actually possible to. It’s incredibly stupid. It doesn’t make sense. I’m sorry. It’s just way number 45643737567356 that I’m an irredeemable mess of a human being. Like… god, sometimes I think if I were to disappear, everyone else in the world, whether they’d ever had contact with me or not, would instantly feel a little weight lift off their shoulders just because the vibe of the world in general had suddenly gotten a little less complicated, neurotic, and unpleasant. I’m exhausted and exhausting and I’m sorry.
Understand you’re exhausted, but you aren’t exhausting. Big difference. Only suggestion I have to offer is to talk to a therapist as soon as feasible. Lots of good therapy happening virtually. I’ll be holding you in the light (Quaker prayer).
Growing up, I had a favorite aunt on my dad’s side of the family (who was also my Godmother). After her divorce, she moved back in with my grandma, and was my parents’ preferred sitter if they had to go out of town for any length of time. To my eyes, she was the cool aunt – she smoked and drank and cussed; she had a manual pickup truck with a “you toucha my truck, I breaka your face” sticker (along with a small shrine to her beloved mice on the dashboard); and any time she came to stay at the house she brought bag-loads of whatever craft interested her at the time so she could share it with me. (At some point, she switched to Dr. Pepper, which she was also happy to share since I was the only other person in the family who liked the stuff.)
Somewhere around the early '90s, this aunt and my parents had a massive falling out. I’m still not entirely sure what happened, but looking back it’s obvious that she had become very jealous of how successful Dad had been in his line of work. Many years later, I would learn that this aunt had never cared for my mother for some unknown reason, and thought Dad should never have married her (even though this aunt loaned Dad the money to purchase the engagement ring…). Needless to say, I didn’t have much contact with this aunt once I grew up; I saw her a few times when I was in college, and most recently at my grandmother’s funeral in 2014. We weren’t even friended on Facebook.
This aunt passed away yesterday afternoon of a suspected heart attack. Despite the pandemic situation, the rest of the family is going ahead with a funeral mass, complete with singing. 
I can’t even get updates on Facebook – apparently everyone else in the family is discussing this on the aunt’s page, which I can’t view due to the lack of friend status. (One relative has made a public post there; it appears that I can at least leave a comment on that.) I guess I’ll send flowers? I’ve talked to one of my uncles, who can’t believe they’re going ahead with the mass and understands my concerns about attending. Maybe there will be a separate memorial service at a later date? The last time she discussed such things with me, she said she wanted “Born to Be Wild” played at her funeral…I’m pretty sure that’s not a standard part of a Catholic funeral mass.
@SurrenderDorothy- we may not know you in a physical space, but know we feel your words. In those words we see your value. You are worth so much more than your brain is telling you.
As @BippityBoppityBoo said, you’re exhausted, but not exhausting.
My brain has a fun quirk where if I am tired at all, say because I was up late getting school stuff ready for the daughter, it will constantly be filled with thoughts of how worthless I am. So I have a major case of the worthless feelings because I slept one hour less than usual. Great.
On top of this, my stomach decided today would be a good day to try to digest my entire esophagus. I am already being treated to GERD but, every once in a while, I get some hours long, wicked heartburn. I feel like I’m breathing fire.
Oh, dear lord yes - I was working with a particularly potent batch of chipotles and poblano (which is surprising because poblanos aren’t normally known to be terribly hot) and failed to wash my hands thoroughly yesterday. Unfortunately my skin was very dry and my hands and face burned all yesterday afternoon and evening (of course I forgot about the burn and rubbed my face and eyes last night out of irritation at something or other). That was fun.
So…for bacon/jalapeno/cheddar bread, did you make beer bread with said ingredients or was it just regular bread with those items thrown in? Next time I grope hot peppers, I’m going to have to get something good and more lasting from it - although the tacos we had for lunch yesterday were really good, they sure weren’t as carb-y as I was in the mood for.
I used this recipe. It did come out a little heavy. I did discover a schmear of butter and fry it up a bit is fabulous.
That looks amazing - thank you!
Since this is the Pit, I feel like I should be cursing.
Windex is on my list to but now. I hate the little blood suckers and I am allergic to them.
Forget to wash your hands thoroughly after making it and you will be.
My NC State ID card expired on my birthday last month, which slipped my notice until I happened to look at it a couple of weeks ago. So I went to the NCDMV website to see what I needed to do about getting it renewed. It turns out that this can only be done in person, which means I have to make an appointment at my local DMV office. Obviously, since I don’t drive, I have to take public transit; two buses whose schedules are only intermittently compatible.
Of course, if I was trying to renew a drivers license I could do it online.
That’s just stupid. The only reason ID cards expire is because they want to charge you for another bad picture. The DMV workers don’t want to deal with you either, they want you to be able to do it online.
What’s the worse that could happen if you didn’t notice your ID was expired at this point in time? Maybe forget and notice it later when public transit is easier, or something?
edited to say that if I’m calling something stupid, I am obviously too crabby to be posting. I hope you understand that I was saying that the policy was stupid, not you.
What’s particularly annoying about this is that I had gotten the card in October 2017, when I upgraded to a Real ID. I forget what the normal renewal period is for a state ID card, but I know it’s more than three years. I think they set the renewal date based on when I had previously renewed my ID. I’m certain that I had paid for the Real ID, and now I’ve got to pay another $14. Yeah, an obvious cash grab by the state.
I did verify that I don’t need to bring any paperwork for the renewal, just my old ID. Which, of course, makes the whole “have to come into the office” even more ridiculous.
For us North Carolinians, we have to be concerned because of the ongoing court battles regarding the voter ID amendment. Although this ruling won’t impact the 2020 election, if the amendment is allowed to stand it will hurt people who don’t maintain some form of up-to-date state identification.
My mini-rant about the Real ID process: I have to get my name updated on my Social Security card before I can apply for that; my card only shows my middle initial, but your full legal name is required in order to use the card as part of the Real ID application. 
Mini-rant for all seasons: infamous does NOT mean really famous! I just received an ad for a restaurant offering “a six pack of our infamous pita.” 
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
Small, unimportant rant but I got a root canal last Thursday. I had had one many years ago and it was no problem. They cleaned me out, put it putty and no problem. I never completed it. Well, this time, my totth was worm down half the level of the others, so there was no putty, there was smoke involved (they heated something to bond it as I understood it) and it took long and it felt uncomfortable when they were doing it, even under novocaine. When I got home, it was difficult to eat spaghetti even and it was sensitive, even when brushing. Finally it has calmed down.
My mini-rant about the Real ID is that I didn’t check the box for it when I renewed my license a few years ago so at some point in the future I have to go to the DMV to get it.
Yikes.
Clarify, please. Being treated TO GERD, or being treated FOR Gerd?