Things like short skirts and heels are idiotic holdovers from a time when women had no societal value beyond looking pretty in between popping out babies. They’re impractical. I don’t care if you can dance in them or find them completely comfortable: they were designed solely for the aesthetic benefit of others.
Maybe it’s just because I’m not terribly attractive, but I personally think I have other things beyond “ooh pretty” to offer, so I don’t bother with that crap.
(And this ignores how stupidly overpriced things like that are. And those allegedly comfortable heels? How many hours of your life did you waste shopping for the perfect pair? Two? Three? More?)
For me it is a shoe fetish. Heels are sexy to me in the store, on a young woman walking by, or at the end of my big legs. What in the world is with all the over analysing of ‘sexy’? Sexy is something that makes me think of hot sex. Sure, a fast car could do it, and often does.
Really? I love driving a fast car. The Gs, the sound of tires at the edge of traction through a nice long, fast turn. I love it, but age now gets in the way. Never had an erection or anything close to it though. So I drive a Honda pickup. And take my meds like a good boy. And get fat and lazy.
To tell the truth, it’s kinda nice.
I wish I had a fetish.
Do you conduct these negotiations on carpeting?
I guess heels are sorta hot, but only if the woman wearing them can walk in them somewhat naturally; looking like you’re about to fall over at any moment isn’t too sexy. Regardless, I’m usually more likely to think “she looks uncomfortable” than I am to think “that’s hot.”
You know, I’ve been thinking about this, and I guess it’s true, a pair of steel toed Doc Martens are “powerful”, in the sense that you can scramble over a heap of concrete rubble, take the cigar out of your mouth and laugh as you machinegun down a platoon of hapless men… but that’s a very male concept of power. Doc Martens empower you to do things yourself, to get things done.
When I think of the answer to the question “why do heels connote power?” I think of the more feminine concept of power, the power to get people to do things for you, rather than having to do things yourself. Much like how heels originated - only the rich (both men and women!) had the luxury of wearing shoes for the sake of looking good. And I don’t think that only men look at women in a nice pair of heels - some of the more blatent gawkers I notice are women! The power to attract is just as powerful as the power to impose.
Soo… I don’t know where I’m going with this. I guess I can understand why heels are seen as quite literally “hobbing” women, but at the same time, they empower women in a very feminine way as well, in a way which men can never hope to achieve.
In honour of this thread, today I am wearing a short-ish denim skirt and knee-length stiletto boots. People at work have been commenting on this, but I think it’s mostly because I rarely wear skirts.
Tabby_Cat, I think I see where you’re coming from, but I don’t agree that “doing things yourself” is inherently masculine and “getting other people to do things for you” is inherently feminine.
At least socially inherent, if not biologically inherent… think about it,
Woman: “My husband bought me a diamond necklace!” vs Man: “My wife bought me a tailored suit!”
Most women would be envious of the women, but most men would not be envious of the man. Why?
Woman: “I put together my own bed!” vs Man: “I repaired the car!”
Would any woman brag about that? Whereas men pride themselves on being self-sufficient all the time.
I guess this is kind of a hijack, but ever since I started noticing the differences between men and women, these things really stick out in my mind. I understand why being attractive would be a liability sometimes, especially in places where social norms allow for physical domination over people. At the same time, in my social sphere and I should think most civilised societies, where physical domination is not acceptable, attractiveness is really a power in its own right.
Not inherently female, I admit, but definitely more commonly used by women than men, and more socially acceptable to be used by women than men.
My dad says he gets compliments on the shirts my mom buys him all the time from his co-workers. My roommate and I put together our own desks and bookshelves, and it was awesome, and yes, we did run around bragging about that to anyone who would listen. I can’t think of any woman friends I have who don’t pride themselves on being competent, intelligent and self-sufficient. I hope everybody does, men and women.
I don’t think attractiveness (as you’re describing it) is actually a power, it’s a way of persuading powerful people to do something. The seducer can’t actually accomplish anything on their own, they have to rely on someone else to do whatever they want for them.
Wow. So much buzzkill in such a tiny little bit of computer screen.
I buy my clothes based on their aesthetic appeal to me. And personally, I think it’s pretty cool that in *addition *to everything else I have to offer, there’s not only “ooh pretty”, but the confidence to realize that being so does not make me a tool of the patriarchy.
Also, I LIKE shoe shopping. Time spent in an activity one enjoys is never time wasted.
And Tabby_Cat, I put together every piece of furniture in my apartment, and damn sure I brag about it. Especially since I did it in heels.
Oh, good point, I forgot to add that. I love spending half an hour at lunch or after work going shoe shopping. I usually don’t buy anything, but I like checking out the new styles and going, “ooh, I look great in those! and those! ooh, and those!” It’s both a little boost and really relaxing.
I probably have about 50/50 flats (mostly ballet flats) and heels in my closet, not counting running shoes and hiking boots.
I still don’t think that’s actually power. It’s getting somebody with actual power to use that power in a way that the persuader want, but nowhere in that situation does the persuader possess power. According to your theory, why would men need to persuade a woman to do anything?* They could do it themselves.
*I am excluding things that require the consent and action of two people, such as sexual and romantic relationships.
Ain’t that the truth! But I’ve just realized what a hijack this is. Let’s talk about shoes! My birthday is in two weeks, and I’ve bought myself these to wrap up and give myself:
The power to attract is just as powerful as the power to impose.
I can’t think of any woman friends I have who don’t pride themselves on being competent, intelligent and self-sufficient. I hope everybody does, men and women.
